


We Belong

by butterfingers



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, in cannon universe, slowish burn, tasteful smut (hopefully)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-14
Updated: 2019-02-10
Packaged: 2019-06-27 08:09:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 18
Words: 66,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15681426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/butterfingers/pseuds/butterfingers
Summary: Ben Solo has succeeded where many thought he would fail. As Kylo Ren he has lead the First Order for almost two years. But the person that was Kylo Ren is slipping away, leaving only a thin veneer for Ben Solo to hide behind. Tomorrow is a special day for Supreme Leader Kylo Ren and the First Order. At least it will be if Ben can stay alive. Hux has made his plans and Ben has made his counter-plans. But of course their deadly game goes to hell in a hand-basket when Rey shows up...and she’s angry. Angry enough to open the bond that they had ignored since she'd left him behind. Ben can't resist her call and she’s just as crafty, powerful, and beautiful as ever.So it was a bad idea for Ben to go after her, right?





	1. Just Another Day Without The Sun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He was Kylo Ren. He was Vader's heir. And he would follow his destiny. With or without her.

Kylo Ren stood upon the cold black floor of the repaired and restored to service Supremacy. He stared past another massive ship that hung outside the window of his quarters and into the cold of space, its vacuum echoing his melancholy thoughts. What do you get the man who has everything? Another mega star destroyer it would seem. At least Hux thought so. The General stood next to him and grinned like an idiot down at the latest monstrosity that would have cost enough to fund an entire system for a year.

“Is not the Ascendancy a marvel? Greater than even the Supremacy,” Hux crowed. “Supreme Leader, I believe you are looking at the solution to the Khalak system.”

“Perhaps,” Kylo said, cutting in quickly to forestall Hux’s tendency towards self-congratulatory speeches. “It would certainly be the solution to your need to subdue the Khalakans, General.”

Hux’s grin changed to a smile that held more venom than all the snakes of Dagobah.

“Supreme Leader.” A mocking tone crept dangerously into Hux’s words. Kylo turned and looked his General in the eye. Hux reigned in all appearance of emotion but Kylo could still feel the burning rage tinged with fear within the man. Snoke must have been so disappointed that Hux was not force sensitive.

The General pressed on, chin up, back rigid.

“There is a greater task at hand and one star system that does not want to contribute to the greater good of the galaxy…”

“I don’t need speeches, Hux. Why are you here?”

Kylo noted how Hux’s shoulders hunched just a little and his eyes skittered away for a brief moment before he straightened and calmly continued.

“There has been a report of Resistance activity on Judlan Kee.”

Kylo said nothing. So many reports had been little more than malicious attempts to take out a rival, or gain a reward. Bounty hunters had turned up little and what they’d found was old. Even his sense of _her_ had somehow been masked. He swept unwelcome memories from his thoughts and considered the blank expression of the man before him. The General’s irksome face covered none of his seething emotions when Kylo took the time to test them. Did Hux know how much Kylo could feel him churning and seething?

“Why do you feel the need to go there, personally?”

Hux shifted on his feet just a little. “Supreme Leader, this report seemed more credible.”

Kylo knew it wasn’t. Still, there was a glimmer of something else, as though the force was...

“We overheard a suspicious droid communication.”

Kylo opened himself to the force but, like a mist in the morning light, that glimmer of _something_ dissolved before he could capture its meaning. He clenched his fist and ground his teeth in frustration. The light never failed to tempt him, tantalising and inviting him to return to its waiting arms, to see, know and feel again what it had to offer. He would not. The light had betrayed him before and so, in bitter resignation, he turned back to the cold expanse of space on the other side of the transparisteel.

He waved a dismissive hand. “Go. Send me regular updates.”

“Supreme Leader,” Hux murmured in deference as the General retreated from his presence. When the General was gone the persona of Kylo Ren slipped away and Ben Solo breathed a sigh of relief. It was getting harder and harder to maintain the facade. Ben sensed the lingering subterfuge surrounding the General; the dark side whispered its warning to him again. Yes, Ben was aware that the General had secret plans and that tomorrow was important to Hux in more ways than one. Ben let a smile play about his lips for a moment then returned to his solitary contemplation of space.

Tomorrow Hux would take command of the repaired Supremacy, the imposing declaration of power and military might on whose polished floors Ben now stood. Tomorrow would also see the launch of the Ascendancy, Kylo Ren’s new mega destroyer, both larger and containing even greater surprises than the Supremacy. There would be parades and inspections, and Hux would make grand speeches as he was wont to do. Then they would leave to subdue the Khalak system.

Ben should have been proud of his achievements as Supreme Leader Kylo Ren. He had lead the First Order to greater military feats than many had expected. Yet, with each empty triumph he knew…

…it was just another day without the sun.

Ben looked out into the depths of space, wondering what it held. Who. Where she…Kylo Ren clenched a fist and quashed the memory.

He refocused back to the matter at hand. Hux was ready to make his move. He had to ensure the General did not succeed. Ben turned to the protocol droid standing behind him.

“Is everything prepared for tomorrow, C3N1?”

The droid looked up from the data screen.  “Yes, Supreme Leader. I have prepared everything as you ordered.”

Ben nodded. “You will go ahead of me to the Ascendancy. I have further instructions awaiting you there when you log into my personal computer.”

Ben pulled a cylinder from his belt and handed it to C3N1. The droid looked at it for a moment then took it, its round silver eyes regarding him with polite inquiry.

“Ensure that General Organa gets this in the event of my death.”

The droid stepped back, its normally unflappable composure gone. “Supreme Leader, I…”

Ben cut the droid off with a curt wave of his hand.

“I should also warn you that droids who involve themselves in espionage will have their memories deleted if they get caught.” C3N1 looked as terrified as a droid could look.

The droid nodded, its posture drooping in calm acceptance. “Yes, Supreme Leader.”

Ben smirked and patted the droids smooth metallic shoulder with his gloved hand. “I’m trusting you C3N1.”

The droid straightened again, the tilt of its head signalling its confusion even as its fluttering hands appeared to celebrate its reprieve. “Yes, Supreme Leader.”

Ben grew pensive as the droid shuffled away with hurried steps to carry out its orders.

Ben turned and continued to stare out into space. Maybe he would try to sleep, at least for a little while. He slowly breathed in and out. No, he would meditate, at least that way he wouldn’t dream…

A point of light caught his eye; a comet maybe. He watched it, mesmerized by the brightness as it cut a swathe through the dark of space.  

The brilliant intensity of its radiance illuminated the cold, sterile room as the fiery projectile soared past the fleet. He quietly watched nature’s violent display of heat and energy blaze its course through the dark expanse of space, a mix of wonder and hopelessness rising within him. Ben swallowed the sting of tears as he foolishly wished he could be consumed in its fire.

There had been a brief glow of fire once, in the cold emptiness of his life.

And no matter how hard he looked for her he could not find her.

His loss and loneliness welled up, its claws at his throat. He clenched his fists, willing his pain to fuel the dark side in him, except all he felt was the pain, the full power of the dark ever elusive.

He turned and strode into his private chamber and knelt before the glass case that still held his one treasure.

He was Kylo Ren.

He was Vader’s heir.

And he would follow his destiny.

With or without her.


	2. Betrayal of Chalst

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey bit her lip. There were a few things that had caught her eye in their travels - things she could fix and repurpose.  
> "Do you mind if I head back? I thought I saw some used power units we could fix up."  
> Finn sighed and shook his head in mock disapproval, a wry smile on his face. "You still love junk."

“Don’t be long,” Rose’s voice came over the comm.

“No worries sweetheart, we won’t,” Finn replied, turning to mutter under his breath out of hearing range of the comm. “Lomas isn’t the most exciting place in the galaxy. I doubt there’ll be much to keep us there.”

Rey smiled as she completed the nav computer coordinates while Chewie went through pre-hyperspace checks. Lomas, their destination, was an almost invisible world, even in the outer rim. The one main port of Chalst was a small city on a small planet but it had what they needed.

Rey could feel that Finn was already itching to get back to Rose. Except that Rose was hard at work on her cloaking technology, well…as hard as she could manage to work right now. Leia had decided Finn was a distraction so she’d sent him with Rey and Chewie on their little shopping trip.

Before leaving for Lomas, Rey peered down through the grimy thermal window of the Millennium Falcon, idly examining the planet below. All it had was a number, BH056. Rey thought of it as the “little rock”. A perfect place for their new Resistance base. This was their second new base since Crait, their last one having been discovered by a smuggling gang also looking for a new hideout. Fortunately the Resistance was long gone by the time the First Order arrived.

Poe and Snap had found this new base. It was hospitable, to an extent. A rocky, barren place on the surface but riddled with cooled lava tunnels underneath. Furthermore, it had a breathable atmosphere and a power source, abandoned but salvageable. Water was a little scarce but they had the technology for that. Most important it was far enough out of the way to make detection by the First Order difficult but not so far that it would hinder them from maintaining their connection to the network they had so meticulously created.

The main issue was food. Whoever had abandoned the settlement in the past hadn’t left much behind, but there were enough rations to keep them going while they got the hydroponics unit functioning. Of course medical supplies were in the shortest supply right now, having used almost everything they had.

The jump to hyperspace was smooth for an old rust bucket. Rey had spent a lot of time with Chewie working on the Falcon as one of their few means of transport in the beginning. She loved the thing as much as he did. They had avoided large craft at first so as to be harder to track. Rose had been certain that, in spite of the substantial repairs made by the First Order to the heavily damaged Supremacy, the First Order’s now useless hyperspace tracking technology would not stay that way forever. Soon enough the tyrants would be able to find them again. Smaller, cloaked craft seemed better able to avoid detection.

Rebuilding the Resistance fleet and numbers since Crait had been a slow and disheartening process. At first many of their allies were scattered and under duress from the First Order. The story that a young Jedi, taught by the legendary Luke Skywalker himself, was now fighting for the Resistance had buoyed some, but initial support had not been as encouraging as Leia had hoped. And yet, in recent months, the network had bloomed like wildflowers in hidden valleys. C3PO babbled like a child as he reported news of confirmed and vetted links that spread across the galaxy.

Chewie clapped a huge hairy hand on Rey’s shoulder, huffed an excuse and then headed back to the lounge where he engaged in a zillionth round of battle with R2 over the Dejarik table. Rey shook her head. The battle had apparently been going on since forever. Smiling warmly, she turned in her seat to face Finn.

“How are things going with Rose?”

“Good,” Finn replied, not quite hiding his tired smile.

“She hates being pregnant though.”

Rey smiled, glad that her friend had found so much happiness. She wished…  In spite of herself, she looked down and closed her eyes, the memory of _his_ face looking up at her burned her heart once again.

Rey and Finn sat in companionable silence for a little while until they heard Chewie howl his displeasure from the lounge, followed by R2’s expletive-laden droid speak reply. Rey shook her head and chuckled. Two old friends who never cared to be anything other than themselves together.

Finn’s next words startled her.

“I heard a rumour on the holonet that it was Luke Skywalker who killed Snoke.”

Rey laughed, a bitter sound. Leia was the only person with whom she’d shared the truth about that day. Or, at least, _part_ of it – that Ben had killed Snoke.

“Which is funny seeing as the only Jedi I know who was there was you,” he said. There was only the sound of the hyperspace engines between them.

“I know it was Kylo Ren,” Finn said. Rey flinched.

“You went there to convince him to leave, like Han, didn’t you?”

Rey nodded, dashing an unexpected tear away as the painful memories she tried so hard to keep below the surface rose up again. She gulped down a breath and squared her shoulders, determined to banish the ache in her heart.

Finn shook his head in disbelief. “Rey. He could’ve killed you too.”

Rey scowled and stared hard out into hyperspace. “He had the chance to do that.”

Finn’s brows lowered and the look in his eye sharpened. “What do you mean?”

Rey bit her lip. She shouldn’t have said that. She looked away. Maybe it was time to talk about it, maybe someone else should know that Ben was still in there somewhere.

“Snoke ordered him to kill me but he killed Snoke instead.”

Finn’s mouth dropped open but then he closed it. Rey watched with a plummeting heart as he pursed his lips, pessimism sharpening the look in his eye. Had she been wrong to think he might see some hope for Ben as well? Maybe now wasn’t the right time to tell him after all.

A disdainful snort from Finn confirmed her suspicion. “And now he’s Supreme Leader. _How_ convenient.”

Rey saw the questions in his eyes that he couldn’t quite find all the answers to. She knew she couldn’t tell him the rest yet. Let them know Ben had killed Snoke instead of her - they could puzzle on that for now. There were some things she wasn’t going to revisit.

“Why did he let you go?”

Rey swallowed, returning to her stoic contemplation of hyperspace, quashing the guilt and heartbreak. “Who says he let me go?”

Finn’s wry laugh and head shake put Rey at ease again but there were still questions in Finn’s eyes. To her relief he didn’t pursue any more answers.

The alarm signifying the end of their journey sounded and she turned back to her piloting duties, grateful to put uncomfortable thoughts from her mind.

There was no trouble landing until local customs officials turned a wary eye their way. Their story that they were colonists looking to replenish basic supplies was scrutinised more than she would have expected but Rey couldn’t feel any imminent danger, just an undercurrent of worry. They were both relieved when officials were diverted by a call about contraband goods from another ship.

“I thought we were gone there for a minute,” Rey said.

Finn looked more rattled. “We need to keep our eyes open. That smelled too much like the First Order.”

As agreed, Chewie stayed with the ship and kept her ready for a fast take off if needed. R2 rolled along behind them.

It took them almost an hour to get all the supplies they needed. They chose to haul their supplies back to the Falcon themselves, to avoid extra porting costs and unwanted questions about their transport. Rey used it as an excuse to practice her force skills, ensuring everything was stashed quickly without using local labour. R2 also manipulated city computer logs into believing they hadn’t really been there as well.

“Okay, time to go,” Finn said.

Rey bit her lip. There were a few things that had caught her eye in their travels - things she could fix and repurpose.

“Do you mind if I head back? I thought I saw some used power units we could fix up.”

Finn sighed and shook his head in mock disapproval, a wry smile on his face. “You still love junk.”

“Hey, it’s not junk if it works and helps the Resistance,” she said. R2 whistled his agreement.

“Fine, let’s go. This better not take too long though.” R2 whistled and beeped. Rey sensed an unexpected pull in the force, just a glimmer of – _something_ – and stopped.  She looked at R2.

“Sorry R2. I think you should stay here, just in case we have to leave fast.” R2 made a low grumpy beep that caused Rey to chuckle. However, he turned and trundled back up the Falcon’s ramp.

Heading out again, Rey knew where they were going so they covered ground quickly. As they walked through dusty streets full of rusting metal, peeling paint and makeshift stalls Rey felt that tug from the force again. She let herself feel what it was but it was too vague and ethereal as yet.

When they reached the junk seller, almost on the other side of town, Rey discovered, to her disappointment, that the power units were missing several key components.

“It would cost the same to buy new power units as it would to buy all the separate bits to fix these up,” Finn grumbled. Reluctantly Rey agreed, so they moved on, continuing her quest for useful scrap.

Something else caught her eye. A box made of graflex metal sheeting; the box didn’t matter but the metal sheeting was exactly what she was looking for to repair Luke’s lightsaber. She stubbornly refused to think of it as anyone other than Luke’s. It stopped her from dwelling on its more recent history. Determined to linger as little as possible, she made the purchase quickly with little haggling and turned to go.

The pull came again, this time more urgent. She let herself open up to it and it felt like a warning. Cautiously looking around, she felt and saw nothing in the locals that implied the threat came from there.

She took another step but far away voices called to her. Rey stopped, closed her eyes and breathed. Screaming, anger and fear assaulted her, and she sensed something in the sky.

“Rey?” Finn said. Rey opened her eyes, wary of attracting attention to themselves.

“We need to leave. Now.” Finn’s eyes grew wide. Rey didn’t wait to explain, breaking into longer strides so as to cover more ground without appearing to rush.

Finn caught up quickly, looking rattled again. “What is it? Do you sense something?”

“Yes…no…I don’t know.” They tried to hurry without attracting attention. As they made their way back to the Falcon it seemed as though the whole planet had heard the same thing as Rey. A tension began to creep into the people around them.

They’d ventured further from the Falcon than Rey had realised and were still several streets away when they heard the first gasps and cries of dismay. They looked up in alarm as the thunder of a star destroyer slowing caught their attention, its bulk emerging from over a mountain range. It must have come out of hyperspace on the other side of the planet, then skimmed along the surface to their location, no doubt hoping to catch people off guard.

“What the hell?” Rey muttered. What was the First Order doing here? The scream of TIE fighters sent chills along every fiber of her body.

“Come, on we gotta get out of sight. The Falcon’s too far away,” Finn yelled. As if validating his words, troop transports began landing in the streets.

“If they find the Falcon…” Rey started to say. Finn grabbed her hand and pulled her into an arched alcove covering a doorway. They soon realised they weren’t alone. A mother and her two children also hid there, their fear palpable as they huddled together in front of the locked door.

Rey made a decision. She pulled out her comm unit.

“Chewie if you can take off and get away from here, leave. Finn and I will find another way…” she was interrupted by his growl of dismay at leaving them behind. She looked at Finn and he nodded.

“Chewie, the Falcon is one of the few ships the…” she stopped mid-sentence, glancing over to where the mother and her two children cowered. She didn’t want to say the word in front of strangers, however innocent they looked.

“Just get the hell out.” She barked into the comm unit. “You have R2 and the medical and food supplies. They need them. We’ll hide ‘til you can come back.”

Chewie huffed a reluctant assent. She could already hear him powering up for a fast exit as he severed the connection.

Rey heard the distant roar of the Falcon overhead, quickly joined by the deafening rumbles of other ships choosing speed over stealth in their haste to leave. Hopefully the Falcon would be lost in the flurry of ships blasting out of the atmosphere.

Rey ignored the rising sense of dread building inside, relying on the force to calm her fears.

“We’re on our own,” she whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you're all enjoying this fic and can bear with me while I catch up to where I was. I would just like to say thank you to my beta partner @colliderofhadron for all of her help in improving this fic. 
> 
> Please have a look at her artwork that was inspired by the moments when Ben finally catches up with Rey. https://soylent-shirl.tumblr.com/post/177140724676/beauty-and-power-and-here-she-was-standing . I love it and I hope you do too.


	3. Children in the Dust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey froze. One passenger had red hair and an arrogant tilt of his chin that all but declared his presumed ownership of everything about him. A disdainful smirk spread across his insipid face as a giant silver-clad storm trooper stepped forward to meet him.  
> General Hux. On a personal mission, was he?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to my beta reader @colliderofhadron for all of your help in rewriting this fic.

The Star Destroyer didn’t seem to be interested in chasing the escaping ships as they fled the small planet of Lomas. Shrouded in the protective shadows of their alcove hiding place, Rey and Finn stood in front of the mother and her children and looked out at the street as chaos and panic escalated around them. The mother tried to quiet her crying children, fear etched into their faces as they clung to her. Rey peeked out as she watched stormtroopers begin their march down the street. If the soldiers came this way, there was no way they wouldn’t spot them.

Rey moved a little more to the front of the archway, closed her eyes and reached out. She’d attempted this with one or two stormtroopers before but she was stronger now, more familiar with the ways of the force.

“They’re going to find us,” Finn whispered, his breathing quickening at the crunch of storm trooper boots on the stony streets. The mother and her children squeezed themselves further into the corner of the alcove, the children’s whimpers growing louder in spite of their mother’s desperate efforts to comfort them in their small, dark hiding place.

Rey breathed and let go of the growing tension threatening to suck the air out of her lungs. She knew what she was going do. She imagined a barrier in front of her, a shield through which the stormtroopers couldn’t see. Or maybe it was a wall, one that looked the same as all the other walls: stone and mortar, patchy, pock-marked and stained by age. At least that is what the stormtroopers would be convinced that they saw.

“Wait a minute,” Finn hissed, his voice filled with horror.

“I remember now. No, no, no…” He turned to look at Rey, his eyes wide with anger and alarm. His mouth dropped open as though some sickening realisation had just occurred to him. “Rey, they’re here for the _younglings_.” The mother snarled at Finn as her children cried louder again. Finn held up his hands in apology and fell quiet.

Rey looked about and nodded. Yes, that would explain everything. She spoke to the mother, feeling the woman’s terror at losing her children. “It will be all right.” Unsurprisingly the woman did not appear to believe her.

Rey turned back to the street and closed her eyes, concentrating on her task.

Finn stepped closer to her, his voice low and urgent as he spoke but there was a query in it as well. “Rey?” She answered by raising a hand towards the street, letting the force move through her and do as she had asked it. She felt his fears subside as he began to understand that she was doing something before he turned back to the woman and her children and knelt down to reassure them.

The hair along Rey’s arms stood on end and a prickle slithered down her spine as the pounding crunch of storm trooper boots drew closer. She recalled Luke’s first lesson: breathe and let the force flow. Her breathing slowed and her mind cleared, assured that her little illusion would work. No one would even know they were here.

Rey could feel the turmoil churning in her friend’s heart at the possibility of being reunited with the First Order, but she sensed courage too - he would face whatever came their way. She could feel his bravery feeding off her own calm assurance. Another idea came to her.

Rey extended her reach in the force to the mother and her children where they cowered in the corner. She allowed herself a small smile as she felt them respond to the flow of light into their little alcove, knowing that they needed to be quiet as the stormtroopers passed. The atmosphere around them hummed with the tension of the force at work, the light consuming the darkness of fear surrounding her and within her. Rey basked in the light but was determined not to be drawn too far in and forget what she was doing.

After what felt like an eternity, the stormtroopers marched by without even breaking stride.

Everyone breathed a sigh of relief after they passed.

“You did it! That was…I know you did it!” Finn was by her side, awe and reverence shining in his eyes and a slow smile spreading across his face.

Rey looked down, uncomfortable with her friend’s adulation. The mother and her children looked back, wide eyed and wondering.

“It’s okay. They’re gone,” Rey said.

The mother sobbed and pulled her children close again, the trio rocking and shaking and weeping as looks of wonder travelled between each other and up to Rey. Rey felt her heart melt at their joy but was a reluctant to think she had done anything particularly special. She was just glad that the illusion had worked.

“We can’t stay here,” Finn said. He was right. Rey looked out into the street; for now it was empty but there were no guarantees it would remain so.

“Come with us.” The mother spoke at last, standing and pulling her children to their feet with her and purposely striding out into the street with them.  Rey and Finn watched her, mouths open.

The mother turned back.  “Are you coming or not.”  It was more of a statement than a question.

Rey nodded and stepped forward, Finn hot on her heels.

“Our safe house isn’t far from here,” the woman said. “We almost made it back. I can’t believe I got caught out this time.”

“Safe house?” “This time?” Rey and Finn questioned together.

“Last time they couldn’t find those of us who made it to the safe houses. Our mole said they were coming again soon. We have no way to fight back. All we can do is hide, but I didn’t make it to the safe house this time. I’m so glad you two showed up.”

The woman glanced sideways at Rey without slowing her steps. Rey saw her eyes narrow and flick over her person, as though looking for something. She pointed a thumb over her shoulder back towards the alcove and spoke in a low voice “What _was_ that back there? What did you do?”

Rey kept her gaze straight ahead, casting about in her mind for a believable answer without giving too much away. She tried something nonchalant first. “Oh, just a little trick I learned.”

The woman’s brows drew together. “Either you’re a Jedi or you have some kind of personal cloaking device on you.”

Rey gave her a tight smile and nodded. Probably better to go with the second option. The woman looked like she was considering that option anyway. Still, not a good thing to outright lie.

“A personal cloaking device would be very difficult to get a hold of,” Rey said. She didn’t elaborate further, not willing to wade any deeper into the mires of subterfuge.

“Whatever it was, I’m happy to benefit from it,” the woman said, the ghost of a grateful smile making a brief appearance on her tired face. She picked up the pace again as she continued her course down the street. “I’m Hilder by the way,” she called over her shoulder. “And this is Milla and Coll.”

Rey looked down at the adorable little faces that kept peeking up at her. “I’m Rey and this is Finn.”

Hilder looked over her shoulder for a moment. Rey could feel new thoughts turning in her mind but she didn’t want to pry. It was obvious the woman was wary and had heard something about them.

A scream up ahead halted them in their tracks.

“No,” Hilder gasped, blanching in horror.

“The safe house...” Coll whimpered. Up ahead stormtroopers wrestled and shoved families through a seemingly insignificant doorway. Crying younglings clung to their frightened parents as they were herded towards the main streets by the stormtroopers. Rey and Finn grabbed Hilder and her children and retreated around a corner. It was too late though.

“Up there. Get them too.”

Rey looked about. They needed to run, but where...? A laneway presented itself. Hilder was already heading for it, her children in tow. Rey and Finn dashed after her. Coll kept up but it was obvious Milla couldn’t and so Hilder stopped to pick her up.

“I’ll take her,” Finn said. The little girl wasn’t much of an armful for Finn but she would have slowed her mother down. They scuttled into a maze of countless other laneways. Rey tried to gain a picture in the force on where Hilder was leading them.

“Where are we going?”

“To another safe house.”

Something wasn’t right. They came to a long, narrow laneway.

“Nearly there,” Hilder said.

A rough command projected from the other end of the narrow road, halting their progress.

“Down here,” growled the voice of a stormtrooper, one of many blocking their path

“What?...Nooo!” Hilder looked about, eyes wide and her mouth open in shock. Tears began to seep from her eyes and her voice shook. “Someone has given up our safe houses.”

Rey looked at the approaching stormtroopers, focused on a narrow doorway - the only one in the lane.

“Finn, get them out of sight,” she ordered.

“Rey. What’s going on?”

“Get them out of sight.” She turned to him. She could have used compulsion, but preferred not to unless she had to. She slipped her staff from her shoulder and her hand instinctively fell to the blaster at her side.

“Rey wait. You can’t take them on alone.”

“You need to protect Hilder and her kids.” She didn’t argue any further. Instead she turned on her heel and headed towards the stormtroopers. She had to stop them opening that door. Her first two blaster shots hit their mark but other troopers were now returning fire. She used her staff as best as she could to deflect the bolts but it was taking a beating and heating up. She switched back to her blaster and took down another trooper. There were still three left. Sprinting, she launched herself among them, her staff swinging and twisting in her grip as she brought it up and around, knocking one then two troopers from their feet. The last one tasted her blaster. She turned back and smacked one of the troopers again when she saw movement.

She looked back at the carnage. She hated death like this but…

The door in the laneway opened. The sound of a blaster powering up behind her gave her pause.

“Don’t move.”

Rey breathed and tried to get a gauge on the owner of the new voice.

Running footsteps approached. Hilder: “Carlin. It’s okay. She’s a friend.”

“What the hell?!” Another voice. Rey turned around to find two shocked men looking wide-eyed and warily at the lifeless stormtroopers lying scattered on the ground.

Hilder jumped between Rey and the men emerging from the safe house and held up her hands in a silent plea. “She’s a friend. They both are,” she reassured, as Finn approached with Milla still in his arms and Coll by his side.

“We’ve been betrayed,” Hilder said, her eyes flashing in anger and her voice growing hard as she pointed at the unconscious stormtroopers. “The other safe house has been raided and these were no doubt headed here.”

“What are we going to do?” one man said, looking from Hilder to the two strangers.

“Come on,” Carlin said “These back streets are a maze and we might be able to lose them or at least make it hard for them to find us.” Several adults and accompanying children came out and the group moved back into the laneways.

A Tie fighter overhead gave them no quarter. Two shots ahead of them had them scrambling to return to where they’d come from.

“They’re just herding us back!” Carlin spat. Rey realised they were in a real fix. They needed cover or they needed air. What they needed was a ship - something none of these humble folk would ever have.

A shuttle flew overhead. An officer’s shuttle. She tracked it with all her senses.

“Is there an open place ahead,” she said, “where that shuttle might land?”

Wary looks were her reply.

“Hiding isn’t working so we need another option.”

Hilder and Carlin looked at each other. “You want to steal that shuttle?”

“Maybe.”

Carlin snorted. “Lady, you’re crazy.”

“And yet she took out all of those,” Hilder said looking back at the stormtroopers. “And I happen to know she has a personal cloaking device.”

Sharp looks turned her way. Rey wasn’t about to say that she used her force powers to hide them. This little shopping trip had already been blown into a full-on mission without adding that kind of expectation. Finn caught her glance and they both silently agreed it would not be a good thing to deny Hilder’s allegation.

Carlin’s look was duly suspicious.

“Your friend stays with us. If you can get us a ride you can have him back.”

Finn shook his head. “They’ll only track the shuttle. They’ll still catch you.”

Rey nodded and turned back to the doubtful locals. “Look, what you need is for the First Order to leave, right?”

Carlin’s eyes narrowed. Rey returned his guarded look with her own steady gaze. Squaring her shoulders, she did her best to reassure him.

“I won’t leave anyone here to the First Order if I can help it.”

Carlin and Hilder both looked uncomfortable but she could tell their desperation was winning out.

“What if I can make sure the First Order leave the children behind?”

Hilder frowned.  “How do you know they’re taking the children?”

“I know.” Finn stated, the firm conviction in his voice covering the lingering pain of his own harsh upbringing.

Hilder’s eyes grew wide as she stared at Finn in disbelief.

“I heard a story about a stormtrooper…”

Rey cut her off before she could say any more. “We can swap stories later. For now I need to go alone.”

Carlin lifted his blaster just a little, a frown creasing his brow as he considered her. “What are your plans?”

Rey didn’t move. “I have a plan but you really don’t want to know.”

Carlin shook his head. “Not good enough.”

Finn placed a hand on his shoulder. “She won’t let you down.” Finn looked at her. “I can guarantee it.”

Rey smiled just a little and turned to Hilder, compassion softening her words. “I know what it is to be separated from your parents.” She put a hand on Finn’s shoulder. “We both do.” Rising anger hardened her next words. “This is personal.”

Hilder pulled her children closer and nodded. Carlin chewed his lip for a moment but nodded too, even if his gaze remained cool.

“Go now, before they can get any of our children off the surface.”

Rey nodded and turned to where the First Order shuttle was getting ready to land up ahead. She swallowed and prepared herself. She was going to have to talk to _him_.

It didn’t take much effort to slip unnoticed through the narrow streets. When she came out into the square where the shuttle had now landed, she looked around for entry and exit points. The shuttle opened and spilled forth its passengers.

Rey froze. One passenger had red hair and an arrogant tilt of his chin that all but declared his presumed ownership of everything about him. A disdainful smirk spread across his insipid face as a giant silver-clad storm trooper stepped forward to meet him.

General Hux. On a personal mission, was he? A snarl curled her lip.

She watched as Hux’s purposeful stride swept him towards a small party of well-dressed locals. Maybe too well-dressed for a planet like Lomas. The most sumptuously dressed of the group stepped forward and effected a stiff bow. Hux smiled and extended a hand holding a cylinder, which the foppish local took. Stormtroopers then escorted the bevy of locals away, followed by a trolley loaded with cases. No doubt she had just witnessed payment for giving up the safe houses. Her stomach churned but she quelled her anger. She needed to stay focused.

The shuttle was near to an abandoned conglomerate of market stalls, the faded fabric of their deteriorating roof coverings flapping languidly in the heat and movement created by the First Order’s ambush style invasion. Rey turned back into the side streets briefly and made her way around to where she could use the stalls for cover.

Even as she made her way towards the shuttle, she prepared herself to reach out to him.

A group of frightened, tearful children were being shoved forward by stormtroopers into the square, where they were instructed to sit in the dust. The sight of the crying children and the feel of their distress beating against her senses through the force triggered that memory from Rey’s childhood she still tried hard to forget.  She ground her teeth and clenched her fist. She would not let this happen. She had to act fast.

Without a second thought she slipped up behind the shuttle and lithely jumped onto the gangway, using speed to get into the shuttle and out of sight.

She raised a hand as the pilot rose to question her presence. She smiled at him, focused and reached out to him with the force, her voice soft and firm as she spoke.  “You really should check out happy hour at Holimo’s Cantina. I hear there’s Correlian Rum. You like Corellian Rum.”

The pilot looked bemused for a moment then smiled. “Yes, Correllian Rum.” He sidled past her and made his way down to the gangway and off the shuttle.

Rey needed a uniform. Fast. Apparently there were spares, if a little big for her. She went to the console and began flicking through the commands and screens. She reached under the console and pulled out a wire, and all the while opening her mind to the force…the bond.

She’d just found what she was looking for when she felt _him_. She didn’t want to turn around even as his voice sent shivers up her spine, causing her to catch her breath.

“Rey.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic is a rewrite of the original fic Where I Belong. I am very grateful to my beta reader @colliderofhadron for all her help and support with this. You should have a look at her fic as well Sons of The First Order at https://archiveofourown.org/users/ColliderOfHadron/pseuds/ColliderOfHadron. If you've already started reading Where I Belong, I hope to catch up soon to where I was and that you can bear with me until then.


	4. I'll come to you.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Rey."  
> Hearing his voice, soft and sad, broke her heart all over again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and a big thank you again to @colliderofhadron as by beta reader for all your help with this. Your help has been amazing.

“Rey”.

Hearing his voice, soft and sad, broke her heart all over again. Rey would have thought he’d be angry still. She squeezed her eyes shut and forced herself to breathe. She couldn’t afford to get distracted, remembering the children in the dust outside.

“Where are you?”

Rey swallowed and turned, forcing herself not to react to the sight of him. Still the dark angel of her desire. A powerful, dangerous, tired, tense, fragile dark angel who looked like he could deal death or shatter into a million pieces of misery. She resisted the urge to go to him. Gathering together her anger, she blasted him with the full brunt of it, her voice hard and accusing.

“So! I see you’re stealing children now too.”

He scowled. The scar only a thin memory of what it once was.

“What?”

Rey spat back at him. “ _You_ know. New stormtroopers for cannon fodder. You take them from their parents when they’re children.”

His scowl deepened.

“If you’re referring to the children abandoned by their parents. Yes, we give them a home and a purpose.” He looked and sounded arrogantly sure of himself but she knew better. She felt the hint of uncertainty in him. Well, she would see to that.

“Then why are the parents here so desperate to hide their children before they’re ripped from their arms?”

Ben’s jaw muscle flickered, the beauty of his dark eyes tempting her even as they sparked with temper. Yet, he allowed no anger to take control. “No, that’s not what we’re doing.”

“That’s what Hux is doing. I saw it with my own eyes.”

Ben shook his head and his breathing grew shaky. Rey spun away from him before her own trembling became evident. She entered the final commands into the control panel and hit the start button.

His eyes followed her hands. “What are you doing?” She ignored him. “Rey?”

Rey turned to him, pulling the stolen First Order Jacket on. “Whatever I have to do to stop him.”

His voice was soft, entreating her to listen. Force help her, resisting him was a task.

“Rey. Please tell me where you are. I’ll come to you.”

She stepped close to him, looking up at him. “I won’t be a party to this. I won’t let more children be hurt because of your blindness.”

His eyes were full of pain, dark shadows haunting them. She remembered what it was like to touch him and her heart flipped and stuttered as she clenched her fists to keep from reaching for him. He had no such inhibitions though and reached out to caress her face and, like a traitor, she let him. She couldn’t move. His gloveless fingers warm and soft as they traced the curve of her cheek. Her heart raced and electricity shot through her.

Rey closed her eyes and forced herself to push the feel of his touch from her thoughts. It was the children outside she needed to think of. She opened her eyes and stepped back. With shaking hands, she scooped her hair up and stuffed it under the cap she’d found.

“I have set the self-destruct sequence and timed it for the moment this shuttle lands on the star ship above. It’ll take down your ship and everyone in it. I’m going to make sure everyone knows the Resistance is still fighting for them. I won’t let Kylo Ren destroy what good is left in this galaxy. I won’t.”

A red light began to flash on the console and she touched its invitation. Ben’s face appeared on the screen above the console. It was strange to see him there, as well as at her side.

“You’re on Lomas,” he stated. A flash of anger on his face puzzled her for a moment, but it disappeared. She turned away from his image on the screen and looked up at the man who stood before her. Her knees threatened to buckle at the longing she saw in his eyes. She let her anger keep her from giving in.

“Good bye, Ben.”

His eyes widened and he drew in a sharp breath. She swore she felt a flash of panic through their bond. He reached out as if to take hold of her and keep her with him, but she stayed just out of reach. He dropped his hand and swallowed back his pain. It was almost too much for her to see - the hurt in his face shattering her resolve. She wavered for a moment then fled towards the exit of the shuttle, his voice calling after her.

“Rey!” She heard the deep ache in his voice and felt an echoing twinge in her heart. All that loneliness, crushed hope and despair eating away at him as her own devastated hopes and isolation rose up inside her too. Damn the bond that gave them each front row seats to the other’s pain.

The shuttle fired up as she strode down the gangway. She aimed straight for Hux, not letting her steps falter as she approached. She reached out in the force and summoned the ability to slightly alter the way she appeared to Hux, so that he would not recognise her from her visit to Starkiller base or the Supremacy. Easy, he wasn’t expecting to see her.

“General. The Supreme Leader wishes to speak with you,” she said. Hux scowled. He turned to the silver storm trooper, whom she assumed was Phasma, from Finn’s less than adoring description of his old Captain.  A more cold and callous person she could not imagine.

“Hold off for now,” Hux muttered. “We don’t want him to get wind of this.”

Phasma nodded. Rey felt the hair on the back of her neck rise. Was it true, then? Did Ben really not know what was going on here?

Hux turned to walk to the shuttle but then looked at her, his nose wrinkling in disdain.

“I don’t know what you think this is, _pilot,_ but you need to get your uniform sorted out better than _that_. Your pay will be docked until you do.”

Rey looked at him, gathering the force to her. “Yes, General. I really do think you should leave the children behind though.” Hux’s forehead wrinkled into a brief frown but he then nodded and strode off up the gangway. With a subtle wave of her hand, the gangway shut behind him.

Rey watched as the shuttle took off, the action of the door closing triggering the command she had entered just minutes ago. She hadn’t quite planned for Hux to be on the shuttle but she’d take the chance if she could. The Republic deserved that much for what he’d done.

“What’s going on, Ensign?” Phasma demanded. When the silver stormtrooper turned fully towards her, Rey noticed that one side of the towering Captain’s mask had been repaired and a blue light shone behind the repaired section, as though an electronic eye glowed there.

“I don’t know but I think there were reports of the Resistance in the area.” She pulled on the force again. “I think it would be best to leave the children behind. You don’t need them.”

Phasma looked at her for a moment then turned back to the rising shuttle.

 

______________________________

 

Ben looked at the place where Rey had been standing only moments before, not sure if she'd really been there. All his resolutions to be angry with her had dissolved the second he’d felt her pull. He’d come running like the foolish boy he was. For an instant when they’d touched, his soul filled with light again and he’d dared to hope.

He let out the breath he was holding and clenched his fists. Lomas. He forced himself back into the mould of Kylo Ren, the automaton he functioned as, enabling him to keep his world in order. He sent a message to the Finalizer stating that he would be there presently, then reached out to flick off the screen.

Movement caught his eye and he withdrew his hand.

Hux came into view.

“Supreme leader. This is unexpect…”

“What are you doing on that shuttle?” Kylo snapped - his fury at Hux’s deception, the sheer enormity of it, lending ice to his tone.

“Aahh…” Hux’s mouth worked as he tried to come up with an explanation on the spot.

As much as Ben would like to see the cur get blown to hell with the shuttle, he still needed him to command his military forces.  “Get off, you idiot. She set it to self-destruct. As soon as it gets close enough to the Finalizer they’re going to shoot it down.”

“What?”

“She set it to self-destruct. Hux, your shuttle is going to blow up.”

“She…?”

“Yes. _She_.”

“The Jedi…” Hux’s eyes bulged as the slow realisation sank in. He jumped up and looked about in panic. He immediately began working the console.

“This is General Hux. Use my voice as your command signature. Belay self-destruct.”

Nothing happened. Hux’s voice squeaked as he shouted at the computer.

“BELAY SELF-DESTRUCT!” Ben watched in morbid fascination as Hux began furiously punching  commands into the console, his agitated face reddening to a shade that rivalled his hair. Ben raised an amused eyebrow as he listened to the array of increasingly vulgar curses spitting from Hux’s tense mouth, smirking at the usually unflappable General’s discomfort as he fell apart before him.

“Find an escape pod and get off that thing,” he commanded. Hux looked up, panic now screaming from every pore on his face.

“An escape pod, Hux. Get off that thing!”

Hux didn’t delay any further and disappeared from view. Ben sat there watching until the screen went to static, the low hum a bizarre note ending the General’s maniacal exit from the shuttle.

Rey! A glimmer of light broke through the desolate shadows of his world. For all the dark power he wielded he couldn’t…wouldn’t put it out. It was there, shining like a beacon in a corner of his heart.

He expected there to be conflict, but there wasn’t. Just the calm acceptance of the light in the dark, like it was always meant to be there.

He looked out the window and remembered the comet from earlier. He sucked in a ragged breath and let out a dry self-mocking snort of contempt. He’d wanted Kylo Ren to die in its fire. Maybe he’d have his chance yet.

Lomas. He had to get there - fast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic is a rewrite of the original fic Where I Belong. I am very grateful to my beta reader @colliderofhadron for all her help and support with this. You should have a look at her fic as well Sons of The First Order at https://archiveofourown.org/users/ColliderOfHadron/pseuds/ColliderOfHadron. If you've already started reading Where I Belong, I hope to catch up soon to where I was and that you can bear with me until then.


	5. Flight Into The Forest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Goodbye Ben...
> 
> No. He wouldn’t let her go this time. She wasn’t going to get away. He wasn’t going to be so stupid this time. He took a calming breath. This time he’d…his steps faltered as he realised he’d do anything for her, if she would just stay with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, a big thank you to @colliderofhadron for all your help in getting this chapter up to scratch. Love your work.

Rey’s eyes squinted in the bright sunshine as she tracked the First Order shuttle. Her eyes caught a flash of sunlight on metal as Hux’s tiny escape pod ejected from its side. The doomed shuttle continued its trajectory skyward before the Finalizer efficiently blasted it out of the atmosphere.

Phasma looked up and saw the dirty smoke and burning debris that scattered across the sky, and leapt into action.

“All commands return to departure point immediately. Leave the children behind. Resistance activity has been detected. Leave all children behind.”

Rey backed away, letting others fill the space she’d occupied in the crowd. She melted back into the streets, dumping the various pieces of her stolen First Order uniform as she went. The normally sleepy marketplace transformed into a scene of frantic activity as stormtroopers ran towards the transport shuttles, their powerful engines bursting into life. The glare of the sun reflected off the shiny white plasteel coating of the troopers’ helmets as they cast wary glances around them, on the look-out for any signs of insurgents. One by one, the transports thrust themselves off-planet towards the star ship above.

Rey wasn’t sure what sequence of events she’d set off here, but at least the First Order had left the children behind. She hugged the walls and shadows and kept her head down as she skirted around the streets and found Finn, who was still with the others. Rey felt her turmoil melt away as desperate parents were reunited with their frightened children, smiles beaming through their tears and hugs like sunshine as the last of the remaining stormtroopers disappeared.

Finn smiled and nodded when he saw Rey. It felt like hours since she had left him with Carlin, Hilder and her younglings, promising to do her best to prevent the First Order taking the Lomatian children.

Hilder jumped up and ran to Rey’s side, eyes wide with wonder.

“What did you do? What did you say?”

Rey bit her lip, she didn’t want to give too much away.

“There was an assassination attempt on General Hux and now they’re looking for the Resistance instead. They’re leaving the children behind.”

Hilder’s mouth fell open and her eyes grew wide.

“The Resistance. Here on….? Wait.” Her eyes narrowed and other onlookers drew closer.

“It’s you. Isn’t it. You and Finn here. You’re with the Resistance.”

Rey could only give her a tight smile. She’d brought trouble to their world. It might not matter that the stormtroopers had left the children behind - the star destroyers lurking above meant the threat remained. The First Order wouldn’t hesitate to decimate the planet if they thought the people of Lomas were harbouring the Resistance.

Except there was a spark in Hilder’s eye that began to burn.

“For _so_ long we’ve had no choice but to let the First Order take what they want. Lomas would be one of the most prosperous worlds in the sector if it wasn’t for those monsters draining everything we have.” She spat with contempt. “Most of all they take our children.”

A shudder halted her words but after a moment she straightened her shoulders. “We thought the Resistance was dead. We thought the First Order had wiped them out. That there was nothing for us to do but submit. But then we heard that Luke Skywalker had trained a new Jedi.”

Rey looked down and fiddled with her tunic, her nervous fingers ironing out imaginary creases. She’d sen the hope blossoming in Hilder’s eyes and felt unworthy of such high regard. Hilder continued, firm determination creasing her brow.

“If the Resistance is still alive I will do what I can.”

Finn stepped forward. “But if you collaborate with us the First Order will punish your world. I know what they do.” He turned to Rey. “I won’t let that happen.”

Rey closed her eyes and drew on the force for guidance. “Take us captive and hand us over,” she said. Her eyes caught Finn’s. He nodded.

“No.” It was Carlin this time. “I know where I can get hold of a landspeeder. If you can make it to Greval, you will find a smuggler named Kwill who will give you passage off-world. We’ll give you until midday but after that…”

Hilder pulled at Carlin’s arm, a scowl on her face. “No! I won’t turn them over.”

“Yes, you will,” Rey said, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “It’s all we need - a chance to get away and take them with us. What good is the Resistance if we just get you all killed?”

Hilder’s shoulders slumped and she nodded, a slow reluctant tilting of her head. Carlin pulled out a comm unit and spoke into it, using what sounded like a local dialect, as he moved away. Rey turned to Hilder.

“Just knowing people still have hope in the Resistance…” Rey said softly as she squeezed the woman’s shoulder, “it means more than you know.”

Rey glanced up at the sky, midday wasn’t far away. “All I want is for you to take care of your families,” she said, backing away now. Finn was already leaving. Rey gave the woman one last wistful look before she turned to go, a twinge in her heart as she watched the mother protectively holding her children. She’d once hoped for a family of her own but that aspiration had disappeared some time ago. At least she’d made sure these families were together…for now.

Rey turned away, snapping herself out of her reverie. Ensuring that Hilder and her children and the other Lomatian families stayed together was her priority. She had to lead the First Order away. She and Finn jogged along behind Carlin until they came to the outskirts of town. She spotted the land speeder straight away.

Rey felt a tug in the force: something wasn’t right.

“We’re here,” Carlin said. He broke away before Rey could stop him, his swift determined strides taking him to a house almost identical to its neighbours, old Imperial prefabricated stock with few modifications. He looked about as he knocked on the door once, followed by a pause and then two more swift knocks. When there was no answer he knocked again in the same sequence but no-one came to the door.

Rey felt the pull in the force intensify and her hand travelled to her blaster, unlatching the safety as she looked about. She did not solely trust her eyes though, and reached out with the force to feel what was out there. Yes, a shadowy figure lurking in a narrow laneway that lead into the scrub at the back of the town. She elbowed Finn, who had pulled his blaster, and nodded towards the spot. Rey stretched out further with her feelings. They were definitely not alone, but Rey had no way of knowing whether the hidden others were frightened friends, or concealed enemies.

Before she could warn Carlin, a blaster shot barked from somewhere across the road, taking them all by surprise and knocking their guide to the ground, his shriek of pain galvanising Rey into action. She dove for the ground, her blaster and staff in hand before she hit the ground, with Finn following suit. She watched six stormtroopers advance from behind the house and the shadowy figure, Carlin’s assailant, his _friend_ , emerge from the other side. He was unremarkable in appearance - just a plainly-dressed man who looked like he had the same desperate problems as everyone else here. Rey had come across people like that many times throughout her life, and knew she could forgive him.

Carlin was not as forgiving as his friend approached, cursing him for his betrayal. The man bowed his head in shame and despair. “I’m sorry Carlin but I had to,” he wailed before he turned to flee. Instead the man found himself trapped by the stormtroopers that were now heading straight for them; this wasn’t going to go well for any of them.

Finn rolled and took a shot, taking out one trooper. Rey fired off two well-aimed blasts but only one soldier went down. She swung her staff up as she leapt to her feet and used it to deflect several bolts but its usefulness soon ended when it snapped in two. It had taken far more punishment than it was designed to.

A shot came from behind and Rey spun to see that Carlin, clutching the wound in his side, was still fighting as he took down one more stormtrooper. Another trooper turned and shot him again. Rey acted on instinct and threw one half piece of her staff at Carlin’s white armour clad killer, using the force to aid its speed and target. It wasn’t a pretty sight when it stuck straight through the trooper’s neck. The last one went down with Finn’s second shot.

There was a moment of silence as the two of them looked about, grimly assessing the situation. Somewhere in the fray the man who’d betrayed them had also been shot but it was unclear by whom.

Finn’s sharp intake of breath caught Rey’s attention. He pulled back his jacket to reveal a blaster wound in his side. Rey cursed the stormtroopers under her breath as she performed a hurried examination of the injury, Finn flinching in spite of her attempts to be gentle.

“Well, it’s not fatal, but it definitely needs medical attention,” she said. They both knew a wound like this could fester and become life-threatening, especially in the heat of Lomas, but neither wanted to say it. Rey hoped there might be some medical equipment in the speeder.

Her ears caught the sound of a weak, rasping voice and she turned and to find Carlin’s eyes focused on her, his face pale and strained and his hands shaking as he struggled to master his pain. She trembled, knowing his wounds were beyond any help she was able to provide and knelt by his side, guilt eating at her that she could not save him. She took his hand and looked into his eyes, using the force to at least ease his pain. His eyes cleared just a little and he set his jaw in determination.

“Take the land speeder. Greval is not far away.” Carlin’s voice shook and he grimaced. “Kwill will have what you need.”

“I’m so sorry,” Rey said. “Please, is there something I can do for you?”

Carlin shook his head. He coughed and blood spattered on his lips. Still, he managed a small but valiant smile.

“I…I was just glad to…meet the…Jedi,” he said. His eyes grew dim and his head fell sideways.

Rey wished she could do more than abandon him there on a dusty road but she could already hear shouts at the end of the street as more stormtroopers came running, and she still had to get Finn to safety as well.

“I was glad to meet you too, Carlin,” she said and gently lowered his head to the dust, closing his eyes with a light sweep of her fingertips. Too quickly she had to scramble to her feet and leave this brave man behind.

By now, Finn had managed to stumble across to the land speeder and laboriously pull himself into it. Rey ran over, leapt into the driver’s seat and fired up the old beast before heading out of town, just as another band of stormtroopers came into view. She headed out on the only road towards Greval. After a short while, the landscape began to transform, the low, parched roadside scrub becoming taller and thicker the further they travelled, eventually merging into a dark green forest. _Excellent_ , Rey thought. That would give them some cover.

 

 

Hux hated _him_. Why did _he_ have to be the one to save his life? Hux was going to kill that kriffing upstart. He knew it was Kylo Ren who’d killed Snoke. Not that Hux cared about the old snake, but Snoke had trained _him_ , not Kylo, to be in command.

Kylo Ren couldn’t command a picken in a packet of dried gundark ears. That’s why Ren still needed him around; to actually run the First Order and this war while _he_ moped about the girl and his parents and indulged himself looking for ‘The Resistance’.

There were systems that needed a firm hand. This galaxy was meant to _bow_ to the First Order and Hux knew better than anyone what that required.

The escape pod, little more than a steel box, bumped down with very little comfort to his person. He hit the escape button. The pod clicked open and the top slid back.

Above him was a mass of green foliage and thick branches that blocked out the sky. Of course. He was now stuck in one of Lomas’s bug-infested, creature-laden forests. And it was getting hotter as the sun neared its zenith. He ground his teeth. At least Phasma would be here soon with one of her transports to pick him up.

He reached to check his locator beacon. Yes it was working.

Smoothing his hair back into its usual tidy state, he sat up and looked around.

The first thing he heard was the growl of something that sounded hungry. He huddled back down in his pod and hit the button to shut the lid again.

It didn’t shut.

He hit it again. Maybe a wire had come loose and it just needed…no. It was useless. Unresponsive electronics was becoming a depressing theme, it seemed.

He sat up, muttering obscenities at the pod. No doubt something carnivorous would be here soon to investigate, so he grimly resolved to find more significant protection. He pulled out his side-arm and kept it ready as he stood and looked about for the best direction to take. Another hungry growl prompted immediate action as he broke into a dead sprint, in the opposite direction of whatever ravenous beast lurked in the undergrowth. He might not be the muscle-bound tree trunk that Ren was, but he was proud of his fitness and his ability to run, although working out in his personal gym wasn’t quite as much hard work as running on an actual planet.

As he crashed through the forest vegetation, he detected another sound: an engine. Perhaps there was a road nearby and, hopeful, he turned in that direction. A road would also make it easier for Phasma to pick him up.

 

 

Meanwhile, Ben took in the situation from the Supremacy. The older mega destroyer was the fastest way to cross the divide of space with the Ascendancy still waiting for a full crew compliment and last minute specifications. He’d left the main fleet and the Ascendancy behind for what he hoped would be a short mission. Below him, the Finalizer loitered in space just above the atmosphere, its otherwise hefty proportions dwarfed by the monstrous metal island of angles, armour and engines that was the current home-base of the Supreme Leader, until tomorrow that is. He connected briefly with the battleship and made a dispassionate enquiry about Hux before looking at the planet beneath him.

She was down there. He could feel it.

“Sir.” A disembodied voice crackled over the comm, interrupting his thoughts. “General Hux is still on the planet. We believe there was a resistance attempt on his life.”

“I am already aware of that. Has he been found?” While he waited for a reply he reached out to her and found the same blinding evasion he’d encountered before. He shouldn’t be surprised. She was very good at disappearing, in both the galaxy and the Force.

If she was indeed on Lomas, the Resistance wouldn’t be far away. He needed to know why she was here. Was she alone? He absent-mindedly chewed on his lip. The thought of not knowing where she’d been or what she’d been doing gnawed at him, especially given her increasing powers in the force.

The voice from the comm informed him Hux was yet to be retrieved. Ben turned and caught his Lieutenant’s eye.

“Ready my ship.”

He stepped from his seat, straightening his cape and letting it ripple heavily about him: the reassurance offered by its sheer size and weight was always pleasing to him. An old relic it may be, but he loved this thing. So he wasn’t sure what made him swap it for his tattered black cowl instead. Practicality perhaps.

His long strides cut a swift path along the endless halls of the Supremacy. He, the Supreme Leader, would find her and she would kneel…no, that image didn’t appeal to him as much as he might have thought, she would _stand_ before him, and then…then... He clenched his fists. She’d probably spit some other ludicrous accusation at him, but that realisation did little to prevent his knees nearly giving out at the thought of being close enough to touch her again.

Her words whispered in his mind, a dagger of sweet light, leaving his drained soul bleeding once again. It seemed there must be yet more lifeblood flowing through his veins, more of his essence for her to steal. Or scavenge.

_Goodbye Ben..._

No. He wouldn’t let her go this time. She wasn’t going to get away. He wasn’t going to be so stupid this time. He took a calming breath. This time he’d…his steps faltered as he realised he’d do anything for her, if she would just stay with him.

No! He was Kylo Ren. Such weakness only lead to pain.

He wasn’t sure how much he still believed that.

Once aboard his TIE Silencer and speeding towards Lomas, he reached out in the force, just to sense where she was. Her proximity enabled him to track her to the central continent, southern region. Ben let his mind reach out and follow the tantalizing tendrils of the bond he’d fought so hard to ignore. Over the last two years, he’d somehow managed to resist the constant draw of their connection but it was always there, forever tempting him to find her. He sucked in his lip and chewed at it. The bond could not be easily ignored, though, and the enticing draw of it had eaten at him little by little, begging him not to let it die. 

Now above the tropical forest of Lomas, he stopped trying to avoid their connection and eagerly followed the sense of her, his heart rate increasing the closer he drew to her. He wanted to feel calm, in control, stern. He’d already blown that the moment she’d called and he’d come running like a lonely boy of thirteen… Shaking his head, he forced himself to concentrate.

A road through the forest. Yes. He followed the pull of their bond. He could feel her directly below him, among the trees. He skimmed over their canopy, parallel to the road over which her borrowed speeder currently fled.

He’d set his ship to silent running but she still knew he was there. He could feel her fear and frustration. Surely she knew he wouldn’t hurt her?

Another, less familiar presence, caught his attention - she wasn’t alone. He ground his teeth. Was it the stormtrooper FN-2187, the traitor?

He saw the speeder below stop momentarily, then take off again. Without her.

Ben smiled. She knew who he’d come for and she’d made the decision to face him whilst she let her companion get away. He cared nothing for the stormtrooper. He brought the ship to a stop and hovered above her.

The only place to land was a low rocky peak, devoid of vegetation, above the ravine through which the road wound its way. It was just big enough for the Silencer. The tight landing required skill and he had little time if he was going to catch up with her. He virtually smacked the Silencer down in his haste. He didn’t even take the time to fully power down his ship, leaving several systems still operational or on standby - he didn’t plan on being here long.

Ben leapt from his fighter without a moment’s delay and stormed down the rocky slope, using the force to guide him through the treacherous terrain towards her.  He ignited his sabre and slashed at the thickening vegetation in his way, following her potent beacon in the force, his sense of her like a song that played in his heart.

Compared to the biting cool of space, the weather on Lomas reminded him of a steam room as he pushed back his cowl, dragging its stifling weight away from his neck. He began to sweat as he continued to hack back any undergrowth that hampered his progress.

He may have been more powerful than Rey, but she was fast and sure of foot, gracefully navigating the challenging landscape. He might not have caught up with her for some time if she hadn’t stopped. He crashed out of the shrubbery into a little clearing.

She was there. His heart leapt into his throat and his body zinged with anticipation. His eyes were glued to her, the last thing in this galaxy that had the power to move him. The one person he longed for more than anything else. Distracted, Ben almost tumbled head over heels on the uneven ground,  his arms swinging wildly for balance before he stumbled back to find a firm foothold. He stood there, breathing hard and mutely staring at her while she ignored him.

Instead she was holding out her hand, her eyes closed, concentrating.

She wasn’t alone.


	6. Together Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hurting her was too much though and so he let her go. He sat back on the mossy ground as she scrambled to her feet. He would follow her of course but…
> 
> Her voice cut through his weary thoughts.
> 
> “If you let me help him and then let him go, I’ll stay with you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this time Rey has a proposal for Ben to consider. Thank you for reading and please let me know what you think of my story. And as always a big thank you to @colliderofhadron.tumblr.com for beta reading this story. Love your work.

Finn knew he’d screwed this one up. The blaster wound was worse than he’d let on.

He hadn’t had the strength to try and talk Rey out of her stupid decision to face Kylo Ren. With a steely look in her eye and a determined set to her jaw, broken only by the occasional concerned glance in his direction, she’d rigged the autopilot on the land speeder to continue to Greval without her. He cursed his weakness as he struggled to turn the autopilot off and go back for her.

He pushed himself over to the controls in painful lurches that only moved him a few inches at a time. His arm wasn’t responding well to his commands and he had to keep one hand positioned on the bacta packs Rey had pushed onto the injury at his side. He jerked his body again, grunting at the pain but determined to disable the autopilot. He couldn’t let Kylo Ren hurt her.

When he finally reached the controls, his efforts to turn it off lacked a certain finesse and instead sent him careering to one side of the road. He resisted the urge to yank the steering back and cause a potentially fatal over-correction. At least his time in the Resistance had given him the benefit of learning to fly, as well as a few hints from Rose and Poe about the finer aspects of piloting.

The unexpected figure that appeared at the side of the road nearly went unnoticed, but for a screech and a flash of red hair that caught his eye and his fears all in one. Finn reasoned he must be hallucinating from the pain of his wounds but, no, Hux really was running for his life, chased by a large… _creature_ … with four long graceful legs, pointy ears, menacing teeth in powerful jaws and thick brown fur.

The creature was intent on its quarry: a screaming General Hux.

Too late. Finn realised he would not be able to avoid a collision with the beast. In spite of his injured state, he somehow managed to pull his blaster out and take aim. The predator leapt, but its foot caught the edge of the speeder, sending it careering off to the edge of the road. The speeder collided with a small patch of saplings and flipped, throwing him out. Finn’s harsh landing sent pain ripping throughout his whole body, even as the speeder nonchalantly righted itself and waited for its occupant to return. Finn bit down against the agony that wracked his torso. He didn’t need to advertise where he was by screaming about the additional punishment to his wounded side.

The beast tripped and stumbled but quickly regained its footing with an agility that saw it back on its feet faster than the speeder. It turned to see what had crossed its path. Growling and scenting the air through its prominent wet nostrils, it stalked boldly towards the waiting speeder, a direction that would take it directly past Finn’s current location. Finn hunkered down in the bushes, holding his blaster at the ready to defend himself if needed.

A thought occurred to him. If the beast wrecked the speeder he would be stranded here. Maybe he could scare it off. His side bloomed with pain but he forced himself to lift the blaster, breathe and steady his hand before he squeezed off a shot…which sped off into the forest.

The beast hadn’t been expecting the blaster shot and it jumped and snarled. It turned towards Finn, its interest now shifting from the speeder to him. Okay, so maybe the beast didn’t scare so easily. He pointed the blaster again and took another shot. This time the beast jumped back with a yelp, the blast grazing its flank. It turned back to Finn with an even more savage snarl, revealing long sharp teeth for killing prey.

This wasn’t going well. All he’d done was make it angry. He was going to have to concentrate and wait until it was within killing range. His body was working against him: the pain causing his aim to shudder. His brain was growing as tired and sore as his body. This shot had to count. Checking the blaster, he was thankful to note there was room to increase its power.

The beast padded closer for a moment then sniffed the air, as though it scented the blood oozing into the bacta packs on his side. Its ears pricked up briefly in anticipation, then flattened again as it rushed at him, its claws gouging into the grassy roadside earth. Finn held his nerve and waited until he had a kill shot before he fired.

Unexpected blaster fire from across the road hit the beast on the back, knocking the beast off course. Finn heard Hux’s bellowing as he shot wildly-aimed blasts at other beasts now emerging from the forest. He probably hadn’t even realised he’d just saved Finn’s life.

The first beast turned to find a new quarry, the movement exposing its side flank to Finn.  He didn’t hesitate. Opening fire, he took the creature down. Its howl of rage turned into a frightened whimper as it fell heavily to the ground and lay still. Finn lay back and breathed.

There was no time to relax. Several other creatures had noticed their fallen pack member and were coming to investigate.

Boots crunched on the gravel and dirt of the road, approaching at an intrepid pace. Hux. He wanted the speeder. Finn aimed his blaster again as the sour-faced First Order General came into view.

“Put that down!” the General snapped. Old training was a hard thing to ignore, but Finn kept his blaster aimed at Hux, even as his hands shook. He didn’t need any further encouragement and squeezed the trigger. He was in bad shape though and the shot went wide, giving Hux the opportunity to pounce, kicking the blaster from Finn’s hands. He fell to the side as the blaster clattered away.

“So nice to catch up yet again, FN-2187.”

Finn glared at his former commander as Hux now took aim at him.

A growl interrupted their acrimonious reunion. As far as the creatures were concerned, this wasn’t over. Hux sneered at him. “Better to leave you to them.” He turned to the speeder and leapt in, leaving Finn cursing as the speeder roared off.

Apparently the beasts were more inclined to chase things. Or maybe they blamed Hux for the death of their pack member. Three more of them emerged from the forest and focused on the retreating speeder. With a collective howl and much snapping and snarling, the entire pack of beasts took off after Hux and the speeder, their long-limbed gait eating up the distance behind him.

Finn wasn’t sure if he should curse Hux for taking the speeder or thank him for leading the beasts away. He heard the speeder coughing and stalling, and chuckled with satisfaction as the beasts caught up with Hux. He heard Hux’s screams but then the high pitched thrum of the speeder engine cut through the air, followed by a swift whoosh as it took off again. Finn thought he heard it stall and start again once more before it was finally out of earshot. Finn grinned vindictively, it seemed that the speeder was now considerably less reliable since its little tumble. He hoped the beasts would finish off the General before he could reach Rey. She was resourceful, tough and knew how to use the force, but Finn didn’t like the thought of her contending with both Kylo Ren and Hux.

The problem was he didn’t know how he was going to get back to Rey to help her now. If only his side didn’t hurt so much.

He looked about for the blaster, needing to get to it just in case there were more beasts lurking about amongst the trees. Struggling to get up, he used a nearby log as a handhold to heave himself to a standing position, then hobbled over to where the weapon lay. He picked it up and looked about for any further threats.

“Nice work.” A voice came from behind him. A small figure in the forest. Finn turned to defend himself but the movement provoked his injury with depressing and predictable agony. He couldn’t hold himself up anymore and slowly sank to one knee.

“More quorens will be here soon though.” A boy. “Hey. You’re hurt. You need help.”

“I’m fine. You should go before…before…” He didn’t get to finish his sentence. The last thing he heard was the clatter of something mechanical as he passed out and tumbled unconscious to the ground.

For a moment he thought Rose was there and tried to call out to her but as he slowly regained awareness it was clear he was still on Lomas and in pain. He looked about and realised he was lying on some kind of makeshift stretcher being dragged along a bumpy road. He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment and then tentatively opened them again - he was still lying on the stretcher, being towed by something. He tried to crane his neck and see who or what was at the front. His best guess was an ancient droid that looked more patched parts than original.

“You okay?”

Finn jumped in surprise and nearly rolled off the stretcher. He looked up again. Yes, there _was_ a kid walking next to him. For a moment Finn thought he was looking at Poe Dameron as a child. Except that the hair was longer and his large, expressive eyes spoke of ancient unknowable things.

“Who...what...?” he croaked. The droid in front turned to avoid a bump and jolted the stretcher. Pain shot through Finn and he grunted in protest.

“Slow up, Grim,” the boy said. The droid did as commanded with a low, morbid beep.

“Sorry, he wants to get back home before the quorens come back.”

Quorens. If the kid was talking about the running beasts that had tried to kill him then yes, he would also be very happy to get inside and away from them.

Finn frowned, wondering where Rey was right now. He needed to find her. His mind was fuzzy on the details though. Being lugged along a bumpy road wasn’t helping his memory either as more pain shot through him each time his conveyance jolted or swayed. He tried to sit up but the droid whined and the boy pushed him back down.

“It’s ok. You’ll be fine. I have bacta and other medical stuff and my droids should be able to fix this.”

Finn wasn’t happy about his position but couldn’t do much about it.

“Who are you?”

“Reif,” the boy said. Finn felt a slight twinge of déjà vu. He had a habit of picking up scruffy outcasts who turned into galactic heroes. He peered closer at the boy.

“Look Reif. My name’s Finn. Nice to meet you, but if you hang around me for too long you’ll get into trouble.”

“Oh, that’s okay. I know you’re Resistance. I saw your picture on the holonet,” he said. His swarthy grin was too reassuring for the boy’s own good. “I know what I’m getting myself into.”

Finn opened his mouth to say something but closed it again when an unwelcome presence announced itself with a growl behind them. Finn tensed, it was one of those beasts - quorens, Reif had called them.

Reif began searching through the battered satchel hanging on his shoulder. Finn looked about for his blaster. It was currently strapped to the stretcher and wouldn’t be easy to get off in time.

Reif pulled out a small wrapped package and threw it in the direction of the growl. There was a minor explosion of black dust followed by a yelp and animal coughing sounds. Whatever these quorens were they didn’t like the black dust, and fled.

“That will give us a bit of time, but they’ll come back in numbers soon enough. It’s not far now.” There was a howl in the distance and Reif looked about.

“Okay, sorry about this Finn but...” Reif raised his voice now. “Grim, you need to speed up.”

 

 

 

Ben ignited his lightsaber, ready to protect Rey from the beast that stalked her.

“What are you doing? Stop it!” she yelled at him. The intensity of her annoyance pounded into him across the bond, making him realise he’d let his shields slip. He looked at her, a little less certain of his next steps. He didn’t like it when she yelled at him.

“You seem to be unarmed.”

She pulled out her blaster and aimed it at him. Okay, not the smartest assumption he’d ever made.

The beast turned towards him and snarled.

“Put that thing away before you bring the whole damn pack down on us,” she snapped.

Ben ignored her command at first but then sensed that the beasts’ fear and animosity wasn’t necessarily aimed at him, but at the crackling shaft of his lightsaber. He flicked the switch and the red blade disappeared but he kept the hilt in his hand at the ready.

The relief and thanks from Rey was like a balm on his sore spirit that he had no right to want so enthusiastically. He snapped up his shields against her thoughts, the sudden intensity of his desire unnerving him.

Rey had holstered her blaster and was busy observing the beast as it whined and looked about. Ben reached out with the force as he considered using it to quiet the beast now looking at him and send it on its way, but its mind was provoked and inclined to resist his influence.

“Ben. Stop it! It’s not a threat.”

He looked at her. He really wished she’d stop yelling at him. He took the opportunity to study her and realised she hadn’t changed much. The past two years had felt like an aeon to him but she seemed to have weathered it well. There was still a thinness about her, as though rations with the Resistance weren’t much better than they’d been on Jakku, her clothes were still utilitarian and Jedi-like. Her hair was a little longer than before, but still caught back in the simple no fuss style he remembered. Some parts of her had hardened and some had softened. One thing he didn’t remember though were the shadows that lurked in her eyes as they roamed his body in a reflection of his assessment of her.

Without consciously deciding to, he took a step towards her. The beast growled.

“She thinks she’s protecting me,” Rey explained.

Ben huffed. “If anyone needs protecting it’s me. I expect you to shoot me with that blaster any moment now.”

“Oh really? You’re not the one who’s going to be dragged off to the First Order and executed.”

Ben’s anger surged for a moment at the thought of anyone even daring to suggest such a fate for her. It cooled when he reminded himself that failing to drag her back to the Supremacy for execution would be considered nothing less than treason by the entire First Order, from Hux down.

Ben bit the inside of his lip. _He_ was the Supreme Leader. _His_ word was law. _He_ commanded millions. Yet he was totally stumped about what to do with this girl…apart from stare at her like a gormless teenager. Previous experience told him to tread carefully, though - she wasn’t against teaching him a painful lesson or two. However, he was interested to realise that she hadn’t yet threatened him with the lightsaber he knew she must have on her...somewhere. Maybe she’d put it away to avoid annoying the beast standing sentinel beside her.

The beast’s ears pricked and it growled again, but this time it wasn’t looking at him. With a snarl it leapt into a run and passed right by him, heading off down the road.

In that exact moment, Rey turned to flee.

“Oh no you don’t,” he bellowed and charged after her. They crashed through the underbrush, or rather, _he_ did. Rey leapt elegantly over the uneven ground, flinging branches back at him to slow him down. He used the force to break them until he realised that was slowing him down too. In the end he just dodged and ploughed on after her, using the force to ensure his footing.

He tried to get a sense of the surrounding landscape but something was blocking him. It was coming from Rey. She was using the force to confuse and burden him. He pulled on the force and pushed back in the same way... and found it just sapped his power. Or maybe that was part of the force technique she was using.

He clenched his jaw and reached out with the force, meeting her defences head-on and using his dark side powers to smash through the wall of confusion and fatigue she was building between them, closing the gap that separated them. He heard Rey’s furious yelp as he grabbed her arm. Her blaster came up again but this time he grabbed her other hand, yanked her around and grabbed the wrist of the hand that held the blaster, sending the weapon tumbling to the ground. He force pushed it off into the shrubbery and she glared at him, causing him to freeze for a moment and just stare at all her savage beauty.

She twisted out of his grip and he felt a crushing wave of exhaustion wash over him again, its origin no doubt coming from Rey and her use of the force against him. She was off and running once more before he even realised he’d let her go. He roared as he attempted to smash through her defences yet again. It took a great deal of focus to catch up with her again, charging through the underbrush like a hungry rancor.

This time he made a huge effort to leap towards her. He successfully caught her around the waist, ignoring the shriek of surprise and wrath that erupted from her lips, and took them both down among the moss and wildflowers growing on the forest floor. Almost too late he realised that, at the speed and direction they were falling, he may well break her shoulder if he landed on top of her. Before they hit the ground he rolled and took most of the force of their fall on his back. Her snarl of frustration put him on guard but he sensed she was past fighting back after the fall knocked the breath out of the both of them.

She recovered first and hastily scrambled up on top of him. She elbowed him in the ribs and kneed him in the upper thigh, causing him to wince, before she pinned him down. Her hands held his wrists above his head, whilst her knees dug into the ground on either side of his hips to pin him in place. All he needed now was for her to sit across his groin to render him totally helpless. How had he so easily become her captive? A wicked whisper in his mind told him it was because he wanted to be. He ignored it.

Their gazes locked, although his peripheral vision told him her hair was full of leaves and her satchel had slid down and rested on her thigh. He could feel the thigh strap for her blaster holster pressing into his hip…and his trousers growing tight in the groin area. Her hands, locked over his wrists, were as delicate and strong as ever. He dared not look down and get a full view of the gaping ‘v’ shape of her dishevelled coverings.

He should be angry, affronted at being bested again, struggling to gain the upper hand. Instead he was happy to lie there and take in the beauty of her hazel eyes, her soft freckled skin, pink lips that held a hint of a predatory grin and wisps of hair curling about her cheeks. He was so entranced all he could do was wait for what she did next.

Which happened to be allowing her gaze to roam up and down his body. Her eyes lingered on the cowl around his neck, apparently wishing it gone, before rising up to gaze at his mouth. He could barely breathe and his heart began to sprint. He remembered that look from the elevator and had to keep himself as tightly under control now, as he did then. After a heart-stopping moment, her greedy eyes slowly wandered back to his. She delicately sucked in a lip and bit it. He realised he should say something to break the tension between them but some kind of fog had entered his brain and messed with that part that was in command of appropriate things to say. So of course the part of his head that thought up inappropriate things to say jumped at its chance and drawled…

“Still like what you see?”

Her mouth dropped open for a moment then she scowled. It didn’t stop the blush that coloured her cheeks an enchanting hue of pink.

She was too fast. He almost stopped her but it took less than a moment for her to reach for his lightsaber and suddenly she had it in her hand, igniting it above his neck. He tensed. She wouldn’t, would she?

“Don’t move.”

Okay, that was good. If he was an obedient captive maybe she’d be nice.

Her gaze was steady, unflinching and…curious. He took a calming breath. He had to say something before he did something dangerous. Because anything he did with her turned out to be dangerous.

Like a lunatic, he smiled.

“Thief. Where’s your saber?” he asked.

A wrinkle appeared between her brows and she chewed her lip while her eyes shifted down and away. He felt a trickle of uncertainty through the bond, their proximity constantly hammering down whatever barriers they tried to keep up between them. Yes, there was definitely something wrong, he could feel it: frustration, annoyance with him and… _guilt_. That was a surprise.

“What have you done with it? It was gone when I woke up, so you must have taken it.”

Rey pressed her lips together and scowled, refusing to answer. He tried to see but she’d shut him out of her mind again. She stood up unexpectedly, her feet either side of his hips, but kept his saber still pointed at his neck. The vulnerability of his position couldn’t be overstated.

“We broke it.”

Oh. The blinding light.... Of course, they must have broken the crystal. And she hadn’t been able to fix it.

And instead of making a new one she was determined to fix the old one. Still a scavenger.

“Still holding on to old things. Make a new one, Rey.”

Her scowl barely covered her uncertainty. He gingerly tried to raise his head in preparation for getting up. The tip of his sabre zinged past the tip of his nose and back to his neck.

“I said don’t move.”

He swallowed, laying his head back down. This was getting ridiculous.

“So, what do you plan to do next?” he asked. She was chewing that soft pink lip again and he could feel her hesitation growing.

“Rey, we need to talk but it’s a little hard to do that down here.”

He could feel her about to back off.

The distant growl and sputter of an approaching engine caught their attention. They both looked to his left and, sure enough, there was a road close by. Ben looked up at her. She looked down at him. No, she wasn’t going to be distracted and give him a chance. A perverse sense of pride zinged through his chest. What she’d learned from him (stolen, really) as well as whatever else she’d learned subsequently had honed her instincts and powers.

Beauty and power - and here she was, standing over him with his own blade of death at his neck while the world chose that moment to sail by like a voyeur and watch the Supreme Leader of the First Order yield to the Jedi girl of his dreams.

Suddenly aware that they were about to be discovered, Rey looked about for possible cover and, like him, came up with nothing of any use. Not that she was prepared to release him unless she absolutely had to. Rey’s guardian beast was back as well and apparently it had friends now. It was a hunt. They could both feel the fear of the hunted and the purpose of the hunters.

As the intruder came closer a baying sound pierced the air above the sound of the engine causing the hair all over Ben’s body to stand on end. When the speeding vehicle came into view around a corner Ben ground his teeth and tried to get up.

“I said, don’t move,” Rey snapped, the stolen saber still buzzing at his neck. He muttered something uncouth under his breath and Rey raised an eyebrow.

General Hux’s unmistakable hair colour became visible as the speeder drew closer. Ben gritted his teeth, of course it was him. He’d found himself some battered looking transport but was now being chased by a pack of Rey’s guardian beasts. The General’s panicked stare landed on the scene of his Supreme Leader beside the road at the complete mercy of the Jedi. Something speculative entered his eye but the snapping and baying of the beasts reminded him of his priorities.

“Hux!” Ben yelled, compelling the man to stop. The panicked officer’s mind wasn’t so easy to control in the circumstances, being in full flight mode, and his own vulnerable position made it hard for Ben to concentrate. Hux sent one shot at Rey with his blaster as he went past, which Ben easily deflected with the force so it went wide, heading uselessly off into the forest. The beasts bayed and snapped all the more and Hux turned back to the road and sped away.

“Hux, you coward!” Ben yelled at the retreating figure. The beasts from the forest ignored Rey and his lightsaber this time and continued after Hux.

Ben’s anger initially blinded him to Rey’s rising turmoil, but it soon became obvious. The hand holding his saber wavered and he seized the opportunity to use the force to knock it away, sending her tumbling. He let the force give him speed and power as, in one swift manoeuvre, he was up and hunting her to the ground again. This time he pinned her down.

“No. Let me go. I have to go back. Stop it. Ben.”

“Go back where?”

She looked up at him, her body stationary, her mouth and mind closed. It didn’t take long for Ben to put two and two together though.

“The stormtrooper. I sensed him with you before, but you sent him away. And now somehow Hux has killed him and taken the speeder you were in.”

“He’s not dead.” Her voice was sharp, afraid. A nasty jealous streak wreaked havoc across his heart before he snuffed it out with Kylo Ren’s cold-hearted indifference.

“He may as well be,” Ben said with more venom than he anticipated.

Rey’s eyes narrowed. “He’s not dead and I’m going to help him.” He felt her pulling on the force and was ready when he felt the burden of care weigh him down. He smashed through it again with his own power. This was ever their problem - they were too well matched. They could only gain an advantage when one made a mistake. And sooner or later they both made mistakes.

“You know that won’t work now that I know what you’re doing,” he said. A rock jumped up and flew at him and he deflected it to one side.

“Rey, stop it.”

“Let me go, I have to help him.” He looked down at her, her rising emotions beating at his senses like a wild animal. This was the thing that always got to him. Torn between the desire to protect and care for her and the fear of losing her. He couldn’t do the first if he let the second rule his actions and if he backed off to stop his fears from hurting her then she would run, leaving him alone.

Hurting her was too much though and so he let her go. He sat back on the mossy ground as she scrambled to her feet. He would follow her of course but…

Her voice cut through his weary thoughts.

“If you let me help him and then let him go, I’ll stay with you.”


	7. Boy Meets Jedi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey turned and whispered in the kid’s ear but was pretty certain Ben could hear anyway.
> 
> “That scar on his face proves I can kick his ass if I need to. If he’s mean to you just let me know, okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we're getting closer to catching up to where the old fic left off. Once again, I'd like to say a big thank you to @colliderofhadron for all the help in getting this fic up to scratch (and pointing out things I never would have realised).

Ben stared up at her, not sure he’d heard her right. Her eyes regarded him without faltering and her emotions held no guile, her chest rising and falling as she took an unsteady breath. Something warm snuck into his heart along with the little light that already burned there. She was going to stay with him…if he let her help the traitor.

Kylo wasn’t happy at the thought. The traitor should be dead by Hux’s hand, but if he wasn’t… His hand automatically felt for his saber at his hip, where it would normally have been clipped to his belt. He looked around and spotted it where it lay on the ground. He reached for it with the force and Rey made no move to stop him as it slipped comfortably into his hand. She let him take his power back, leaving herself without a weapon and without pressing for an agreement.

Trusting him.

He swallowed. She shouldn’t trust him.

His heart flipped as the full import of her words and actions sank in. Kylo Ren’s concerns forgotten, it was Ben looking at her again now. She’d meant it when she said she would stay with him. She would let herself be in his power…if he played this right, if he didn’t give her a reason to leave. It didn’t quite fill that aching hole in his heart but it came close. He chewed at his lip. Maybe he could convince her to stay just for him. She’d come to him once before hadn’t she?

He pushed himself to his feet and towered over her. She looked deceptively delicate and unerringly sincere. She had shown her trust in him, but could he trust her? Could he afford not to trust her because, in spite of everything, he desperately wanted her to stay?

He clamped his mouth shut to stop himself from rushing to agree to her terms. When he finally spoke, it was to bring up old things he hadn’t meant to, but he couldn’t help it.

“You’ll join with me to rule…”

“No.”

At least that was honest. He wondered if she’d want him to teach her but abandoned that idea. If anything, there seemed to be things she could teach him.

“But you’ll stay with me.”

“Yes.”

Kylo Ren was puzzled by her intentions – and whether they were honourable or not. There was a spark in her eye that threatened his jealously guarded self-control.

Ben Solo just wanted to dance.

Kylo Ren decided this was a bad sign.

Ben Solo didn’t care. She trusted him and would stay with him.

His breathing grew shaky as hers grew calm. He opened his mouth but nothing came out. She was waiting, a hint of a smile softening her already luscious lips. He wasn’t sure which side of him finally gave her an answer and he was shocked to hear the word come tumbling out of his mouth.

“Agreed.”

Her eyes widened as her mouth dropped opened in a slight ‘O’. Had she not expected him to agree? Good. She had surprised him with her offer, her trust, and now he’d surprised her too. Actually, he’d amazed himself as well, but he would think about that later.

For an awkward moment it felt as though something more should happen to seal this deal. A deal in which he hadn’t even made the slightest effort to press for his own terms. A deal in which she made no move to maintain any power over him. A distant booming began in his ears and settled in his chest somewhere around his heart. He was unaware that his gaze had wandered to her soft pink mouth until he noticed how they parted to allow the tip of her tongue to nervously skim along her bottom lip. He swallowed, caught between the desire to possess her and the knowledge that his passion would only scare her away again.

He saw the colour rise in her cheeks as her eyes skittered away and she sucked in her bottom lip to bite it. Ben, or was it Kylo, maybe both, felt a little of their self-control slip away. A rumbling sound reverberated within him that found an echo in her. The bond threatened to come back in all its roaring intensity from the quiet place in which it currently lay dormant. His skin erupted in goose bumps. They had drawn closer to each other without realising. In a panic he dragged his gaze back to her eyes, their soft dark green gold depths threatening to undo him all over again.

He sucked in a slow breath to settle himself. Rey blinked, stepped back a little, then nodded. She opened her mouth as if to say something then shut it when her face grew red again. Without warning she spun away from him and took off at a sprint to look for her friend.

“Wait! Rey?” She was disappearing fast and so he leapt into action, running after her, his longer legs eating up the ground between them, no longer hampered by tree branches and underbrush.

“Rey, wait, we should get my ship. We’ll find him faster…” As the words came out of his mouth he realised that if he could get her to his ship then he could carry her away to the Supremacy. Just as this thought occurred to him, he also realised that kidnapping her again would violate the hasty deal they had just struck. He also knew that she would see right through him and be fully aware of his plans, which meant they would fail and she would know he had just tried to break the deal they had made...Right now, that deal meant everything to him.

“It hasn’t been that long. We’ll find him on foot soon enough,” Rey yelled over her shoulder, without breaking her stride.

Ben was both relieved and annoyed. Relieved that his plans to kidnap her had been nipped in the bud (preventing whatever disaster that followed) and annoyed that kidnapping her would have saved him a whole load of trouble. But no, he was now going to have to do this the hard way. Her way. A whisper in his mind said it was the way he would do things if he wasn’t the Supreme Leader. That whisper had been getting louder for a while now.

He gritted his teeth and kept running. He found it easy enough to keep up with her, but his clothes were hot in the weather of this planet and began to drag at him. He had no intention of leaving anything behind so he bore with it. He wondered again whether his cowl had been the best choice after all. His cape would have hampered him crashing through the shrubbery but the cowl about his neck was hot. He envied Rey her simple clothes now.

He watched her easy stride and the way her swathes flowed behind her as she ran. Little bits of her hair were working their way free and curling about her face. Her breathing was fast but not laboured. He watched the way her curves worked gracefully and evocatively in spite of her practical exterior. Every time he peeked at her he told himself not to look for too long or he would fall flat on his face.

He reminded himself it wouldn’t be the first time he’d landed unceremoniously at her feet, and made a concerted effort to keep his eyes on the road.

They rounded a bend in the road and the methodical sound of old droid parts working, accompanied by the crunch of something being dragged along the dirt reached their ears.

“Finn!” Rey cried out and sped up. Ben slowed as he took in the scene. An antique astromech droid was dragging a makeshift stretcher carrying one male dressed in what passed for Resistance fatigues. A boy walked beside the stretcher. The male wasn’t just a random body though. It was the traitor, who now twisted about to look for Rey. Ben clenched a fist and felt the beginning of a dull ache in his head. He reached up and ran a hand through his hair, pulling the cowl away from his neck again.

He watched as Rey knelt over FN2187, or as she called him, Finn. Not that Finn was his name. He was wounded and, from what he could tell, it wasn’t good. The boy spoke up, a scruffy urchin that reminded him too much of the first time he’d seen Rey. It seemed he had medical supplies and his droid had the ability to perform a few medical procedures.

If it had been Rey who had been wounded, Ben would have whisked her off to the Supremacy and ensured she had the best medical care. As it was, if a few bacta packs and an old droid was enough to fix the traitor, so be it. At least it would make it easier to send him back to…wherever the Resistance was. Now that he had Rey by his side his determination to find the Resistance waned.

He took another step too close and the traitor saw him.

The business end of a blaster and a dark glare was his only greeting. Not surprising since the last time they met Ben had sliced his back open. Finn snarled at him.

“What’s he doing here?”

 

 

Finn had felt the world brighten again when he heard Rey’s voice. He hadn’t lost his friend! He desperately wanted to get back to Rose, but the thought of going home without Rey had gutted him. Now that she was here the world seemed to right itself...

...Until the dark figure of his nightmares stepped into view. He instinctively reached for the blaster by his side, fear coursing through him. 

What was Kylo Ren doing here?

Rey put a hand on his shoulder. He could read her guilty expression a mile off.

“I’m sorry Finn, it was the only way I could help you.”

Finn never took his eyes off the enemy. “I’m not afraid of you anymore.” Which was true, sort of, but he was afraid for others.

Finn kept a grip on his blaster and made sure it was aimed directly at Ren. It didn’t matter how many blaster holes he had in him, he wasn’t going to bow to this murderous tyrant. Sure, the blaster wasn’t going to save him against the power of Kylo Ren but, just like on Starkiller, he would go down fighting.

Rey said something about not getting hurt. Finn thought of Reif. He would have to make sure the kid didn’t get hurt either.

Rey shook his shoulder, distracting him for a moment and her face, gentle, pleading, looked down at him.

“He promised to let you go.”

Finn wasn’t sure he heard that right.

“What?”

“It’s all right. I made him promise.” Promise. Who did she think they were dealing with here?

“Rey, what are you saying?”

“We’ll help you get back to the Resistance.”

Finn’s internal radar clicked into hyper drive as the hair prickled on the back of his neck.

“You say that like you’re not coming with me.” His world began to spin again. He couldn’t leave Rey behind with this monster.

“It’s okay. Finn, let’s just get you to where we can get you mended. We’ll talk about this stuff later.”

“Rey, I’m not liking this.”

Finn turned to Kylo Ren ready to blast him. The monster was looking at Rey.

Finn’s stomach dropped. Oh no. No, no, no. Kylo Ren was more than just looking at Rey.

He’d seen that look on a guy before. He’d seen it in Snap when he looked at Kare’s hologram. He saw it in Nien when he looked at Ghava. Soft, hungry, longing eyes.

No. It was just his fevered brain. He was wounded. His view was distorted. His brain was playing tricks because he was missing Rose. Kylo Ren was not in love with Rey.

He looked at Rey. Sweet, pragmatic, ‘not interested in that sort of stuff’ Rey.

Rey stared back at him, a gentle smile on her face. Finn breathed like she’d given him an unspoken command. No, she wouldn’t fall for Kylo Ren. She was a Jedi. Rey reached out and placed her finger tips on his temple and…

 

 

Rey breathed a sigh of relief as she lowered Finn back against the stretcher, asleep.

“Hey, what did you do?” the kid said and pushed her aside. She put a hand out to steady herself. The kid put a hand on Finn’s shoulder and shook him.

“It’s okay, he’s just sleeping,” Rey said.

“So, you learnt that from me too I see,” Ben said. She ignored the gentle mocking tone of his voice. Rey didn’t want to look at him. She was too tempted to open up to him again and that was dangerous right now, while they were still on opposite sides of the war. She’d missed that feeling of being so close to someone, knowing their thoughts and feeling the way his presence fitted so comfortably with hers. And she didn’t want to feel those feelings again, especially when she thought he’d been about to kiss her in the forest and she’d… no, don’t think it. Not now, not yet.

The kid tilted his head and glanced down at Finn, a frown puckering his previously smooth brow as he looked into her friend’s unconscious face. He held a hand in front of Finn’s mouth and nose, feeling for his breath. He pulled his hand away and blinked.

“He really is okay,” Rey said, tucking the blaster back into Finn’s side. The kid’s wary look grew thoughtful.

“What’s your name, kid?” she asked.

The boy looked up at Ben for a moment then at her. He leant in to whisper to her.

“He scares me.”

Rey nodded - that made sense. A thought came to her and she bit her lip and she leaned in sideways like they were two conspirators.

“Can I let you in on a secret?”

He gave her a childish wide-eyed look that said yes. She couldn’t quite keep the grin from her face when she noticed Ben’s narrowed gaze, looking like he was trying not to angle his head to hear as well, because that would be beneath the Supreme Leader of the First Order.

Rey turned and whispered in the kid’s ear but was pretty certain Ben could hear anyway.

“That scar on his face proves I can kick his ass if I need to. If he’s mean to you just let me know, okay.”

She could feel Ben’s baleful glare hitting her square in the back of her neck even though she wasn’t looking at him.

The shy smile on the kid’s face was worth it.

“My name is Rey, by the way. And you can call him Ben.”

_Rey, don’t use…_

_You really want me to tell him you’re Kylo Ren?_

She felt Ben’s emotions dive bomb at the thought. He did care, maybe more than he was willing to admit. His spiralling emotions blinked out like he’d shut a door. She winced. She hadn’t intended for that to happen.

The kid chewed his lip for a moment then said in a wary voice.

“I’m Reif and that’s Grim.”

“Nice to meet you Reif, and you too, Grim.” The rude reply bleep from Grim made Rey laugh. Ben looked away as though it was all beneath him but Rey could see uncertainty in the way he clenched and unclenched his fist. He compressed his lips and sucked in a breath through flared nostrils as he turned back to them, his eyes turning stormy. Rey spoke in a bright and reassuring voice before Ben, or Kylo Ren, could say something.

“Now, we need to get Finn here some help. Where were you taking him?”

Reif looked at Ben again. Ben relaxed his stance and his scowl faded as though he was making an effort to look less severe and imposing. Rey even thought she saw the hint of a smile play about his mouth. At least the boy appeared to trust her enough to give her a reply. He pointed towards a hill in the distance.

“I live there.”

Rey nodded and smiled. It was back the way they had just come. One thing caught her eye though, and her amusement died: the black shape of Kylo Ren’s star fighter sitting on top of the hill. Ben had a smug smile on his face now, which she ignored. No doubt he was thinking of stuffing her inside that thing and flying off with her again. If she had her way though, they wouldn’t be leaving in anything at all. Or, she speculated to herself, if they did maybe she could convince him to go somewhere other than straight back to the First Order.

“All right then,” Rey said. “Let’s go.”

Reif gave Grim the order and the old droid puttered off again, dragging Finn, still sleeping, behind him. Rey looked at Ben. He raised an eyebrow and magnanimously waved a hand for her to go ahead of him with the little entourage of the boy, his droid and her friend. She didn’t like the thought of him stalking along behind her so she also waved an altruistic hand for him to go as well. He leaned back, looking down at her and folded his arms. She shook her head and sighed.

“Shall we walk together then?” she said. His look grew dark for a moment but then he smirked and, as though they were walking together on the genteel streets of some well-heeled core world in which a gentleman escorted a lady, he offered his arm for her to place a hand upon.

“By all means, let’s.”

She had to admit she was tempted to play the game for just a moment but she was wasn’t quite up to that kind of absurdity.

“Oh come off it,” she huffed and strode off, puzzled by the bereft feeling that shot through her, unsure whether it was her own feelings or if it had come from Ben. This was all getting too complicated. She stared straight ahead even as his long strides brought him easily to her side. They walked in silence for a moment but then he spoke.

“You have become very powerful in the force, Rey. You seemed to have learned a great deal without me.” She said nothing. There were definitely things she didn’t want to say on that account.

“Perhaps you were right to refuse my offer to teach you.”

No, she wasn’t going to be pulled into revealing anything.

“Perhaps you could teach me some things.”

Okay, that one threw her off balance. She looked askance at him.

“You stole much of your original knowledge of the force from me. I know this. Maybe, through the bond, you could return the favour.”

Rey coughed. No. The idea intrigued her in spite of herself, but no. That would be unwise. She remembered well how he was able to roam her mind and she’d wandered through his in return. There were things he must not see. Perhaps she could guide him away from things she didn’t want him to see but she did not want to take that chance. There was too much at stake. Too close to their final objective…except that…

“What if I were to see things about the First Order of benefit to the Resistance.”

He laughed. “Is that all you want to know about me?”

Rey’s mouth opened and closed as heat bloomed on her cheeks. How was it that he was being genuine and she was assuming the worst again? They walked in silence for a little, the sound of the droid’s puttering works and the scraping of the stretcher on the dirt road reminding them they were not alone. Rey watched as the boy leaned over to check Finn again. Rey was assailed with another pang of guilt, realising the boy was being more attentive to her hurt friend than she was. She huffed.

“Reif, I would like to say thank you for looking after Finn,” she said. He looked up, his eyes squinting in the sun as it bore down on them. He grinned and shrugged his shoulders as though it was nothing. For a moment she could see herself in this scrappy kid, dressed in functional clothes he’d probably stole or made himself as she had. He was smart and tough but…and here she stopped. She had made the assumption that he would live alone as she had but maybe that wasn’t the case.

“Tell me about your family,” she said. Reif looked away. Rey’s heart stopped and she knew her assumption hadn’t been misplaced. She was reticent to pry into his story, given her own pain.

“The First Order took my brother and killed my parents,” Reif said. No denial. A statement of fact. She looked again at his face, unlined by worry or regret. It seemed to Rey as though the facts he knew were just that, facts, divorced from his reality. She could feel an emptiness and longing in him but that he had been spared the pain of memories.

“At least that’s what Grim and Sidebolt said.” Grim bleeped a matter of fact agreement with the boy’s statement. Rey focused on the other name Reif had mentioned.

“Sidebolt?”

“My other droid. They pretty much take care of me although I take care of them now too.”

Rey looked at Ben, who had a scowl on his face. Ben said nothing though. She turned back to Reif. Brought up by droids was at least better than her own lonely struggle. Perhaps…

_Droids are not humans. They’re not parents._

Ben’s voice in her mind made her jump. She turned to Ben again but he was looking away, closed off again, as though he’d revealed something to her he hadn’t meant to. She could feel that he wasn’t in her mind but somehow he’d known what she was thinking.

“You can see my home from here,” Reif said, as Grim warbled and sped up a little more. There was nothing obvious at first to indicate a home of any kind, but at the base of the hill she saw what Reif was pointing to. Looking both out of place and as though it had been there a thousand years, and partially concealed behind a cascade of overgrown foliage stood a stone recess whose rocky facade surrounded a solid grey door made of something durable and dark beneath patchy lichen coating.  This was definitely not the kind of entrance Rey would associate with the home of a lone forest boy; there were no scavenged durasteel parts, bits of wood or other local materials to make this door.

Rey heard the sound of a First Order troop transport in the distance and she noticed Ben watching it as well. Unease settled inside her. Her hand rested on her satchel for a moment, thinking of the important contents inside and uncertain what to do next.

She’d made a promise she wasn’t sure how to keep...


	8. Order One-Two-Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That old vision, the one from Ahch-To, wrapped around them, glowing yet fragile: a life together. Rey realised she was seeing it in Ben’s mind as much as her own, as though he’d replayed it a thousand times, just as she had, trying to find some new meaning or hope and, as ever, defeated by the reality of war and choices that kept them apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to to me beta reader @colliderofhadron. Your help has been invaluable and you're a great person to work with.

Rey watched in silence as the First Order trooper transport approached, her heart sinking more with every second. The thought of being taken back to the First Order chilled her - when they’d made their deal, her words had shot from her mouth before she’d had time to think about them.

Perhaps it wouldn’t be like last time, when they’d confronted Snoke and fought for each other before it all went wrong. Maybe that’s what chilled her. Things could so easily go wrong…again.

The transport flew up and away, leaving them behind. She breathed a sigh of relief. Perhaps she wouldn’t be going just yet.

Ben cursed under his breath. He looked back at her, his eyes hard and his jaw set in a growl. An awareness that felt like a storm of anger, loathing and…fear. It left her reeling for a moment and she quivered as their little party halted.

“What is it?”

He closed his eyes and swallowed then looked up at the sky. Rey realised she could just make out the shadow of an enormous ship somewhere above Lomas. That was his ship. Her gaze travelled back to him. What was going through his mind? She knew she could sneak in and see, but that would only create distrust between them.

“We have to get off this planet,” Ben said.

Rey’s scowled. “What?”

“Hux won’t hesitate. He will kill us both if he has to.”

“Ben, what are you talking about?”

Something tingled in the back of Rey’s mind. A warning. Just like the warning back in the markets before the First Order turned up.

Ben spoke to Reif instead. “Your home, how strong is it?”

It was the droid that spoke up in whistles and warbles. Apparently the structure was designed to withstand considerable aerial assault. That was what finally made Rey realise what Ben feared.

“We have to get inside. We have to help Finn! And Reif and Grim!” she cried.

She felt the force moving about her, flowing past her like a rising tornado under Ben’s command as he raised his hands towards his ship on the hill. Rey heard it power up as it lifted off the ground.

A siren went off in Rey’s mind.

“No way. You’re not stuffing me in that thing. I’m staying to help Finn. You promised I would be able to help him.”

“You’re coming with me,” Kylo Ren snarled. Rey felt as though she was back in Snoke’s throne room again, surrounded by destruction and darkness, before she’d had to leave him. No. It couldn’t go that way again.

“I made a promise, but so did you.”

Ben’s ship moved closer. He sucked in a shaky breath and the ship wobbled. He gritted his teeth and the ship stabilised.

A red light flashed on Ben’s belt buckle. Ben kept one hand outstretched towards the ship but with the other he grabbed his lightsaber and ignited it. With one slash of the side vent he incinerated the flashing red light in the buckle. He turned back to the ship as it hovered overhead.

Rey took a step back towards Finn and Reif and the door. It wasn’t far. She could use the force to help get them inside.

And that’s when Master Luke turned up.

“You can’t escape it that way, Ben. If you want to save her you’ll have to do it her way.”

Rey nearly tripped when she saw the apparition. Her mouth fell open. He was back.

Ben snarled at the vision to go away and returned his attention back to his ship, spinning it in preparation to land on the road.

“Ben. It’s too late,” Luke said, and this time the warning Rey had felt in the marketplace before now echoed in Luke’s voice.

Ben turned and looked at her. It seemed like something teetered on a knife edge. The force whorled about them. That old vision, the one from Ahch-To, wrapped around them, glowing yet fragile: a life together. Rey realised she was seeing it in Ben’s mind as much as her own, as though he’d replayed it a thousand times, just as she had, trying to find some new meaning or hope and, as ever, defeated by the reality of war and choices that kept them apart.

Something in Ben softened. Fear and anger tumbled through him, but also something radiant and determined.

 

 

Hux had finally left the beasts behind when he’d emerged from the forest. It seemed they weren’t keen on open plains. He could see a troop transport coming in up ahead and breathed a sigh of relief; Phasma was there to pick him up. He had never been so glad to leave the surface of a planet. If he felt any guilt at leaving Ren behind to the mercy of the Jedi it was short lived. Now he had to make sure that woman never left the planet.

He let the speeder teeter off to the side of the road and roll into a ditch before he blasted it. No point in giving his enemies any assistance if they should find it. A comfortable smile spread across his face as the transport landed and the door opened to show Phasma waiting for him.

“The Supreme Leader has flown to the surface,” Phasma said.

Hux smirked. Oh, this was going to be good. His smirk disappeared.

No, this was going to be his moment. A grin spread across his face.

“Ah yes, chasing the Jedi girl again,” he said. As the door closed behind him and the transport lifted off.

Phasma turned to look at him. “She’s here? He will find her and bring her in.”

“Sadly, I don’t think so,” Hux said. His plans were changing as he spoke. Why wait until tomorrow?

Phasma lifted her head, waiting for him to continue.

“I happened to see our Supreme Leader, he appeared to be in a very vulnerable position. He was lying flat on his back on the ground again. The Jedi had taken possession of his saber and was about to slice his head off.” Hux hoped that she had already done so but a little itch in his mind warned him that she just might not. The whole Jedi compassion thing was annoying like that.

Phasma lifted her blaster rifle as she peered down at him.

“We should go back to help him.”

Hux suppressed an urge to scream at her. He’d better not overplay this. Phasma held their Supreme Leader in some esteem, unworthy of it as he was. She accepted that his lack of insight regarding troop recruitment was problematic, but she otherwise respected his military prowess and political sensibilities. Something Hux had bitterly swallowed as a fact this past year or so. He let that little pill ameliorate his treacherous glee at the opportunity that now presented itself to him.

“I am certain our Supreme Leader is now either dead or compromised. We both know if we have the opportunity to be rid of the Jedi we must take it.”

“General, I will send a full detachment to retrieve the Supreme Leader and capture the Jedi immediately.”

No, that would not do. “Captain Phasma, I don’t think you understand the situation. The Jedi is the First Order’s greatest threat. Killing her is more important than any one individual.” Hux schooled a regretful attitude as he spoke his next words. “Whoever that individual may be.”

Phasma straightened and Hux was uncomfortably aware of how much she dwarfed him.

“What are you suggesting General?”

“I am suggesting it is time to carry out Snoke’s final order.”

Phasma grew very still, her stance ready and lethal.

“Are you certain?”

Hux was getting impatient with her prevarication. “As I said he is either dead or compromised. I barely got away alive. If she is able to so easily turn him aside from his duty then…”

“I would rather we not so quickly abandon any thought of assisting the Supreme Leader. Neither would Colonel Shein or Admiral Savic,” Phasma said.

Hux ground his teeth. Those two bastions of the Empire were ever a couple of thorns in his side that Kylo Ren never seemed inclined to move on. He would see about that the moment they docked.

Hux turned away from Phasma and addressed the pilot. “Ensign, we will transfer directly to the Supremacy.”

He turned to Phasma. “Your loyalty is to the First Order, not to a person. Snoke knew better than any of us Kylo Ren’s weakness. It is time to eradicate it from our ranks before it undermines the hard-won peace the First Order has brought about in this galaxy.”

Her stance became vaguely threatening, as though she was leaning over him to warn him. Well he had a warning for her as well. His voice was low and venomous.

“There are things that I know you would not wish to answer for at a court martial, Captain. But you will face one if you allow this…situation with Kylo Ren to continue.”

Phasma made no move. She knew better than that. Hux turned and ignored her as he looked out at the mega ship looming before them but couldn’t quite keep the smirk from his face.

The moment the transport landed on the deck of the cavernous main hangar of the Supremacy he went into action.

“Captain. With me,” he said as he stalked away.

The ride to the bridge was tense but Hux had no intention of letting anyone get in his way this time.

He stepped from the elevator, pursing his lips to keep the grin from his face as he strode forward. Without further ado he pulled a cylinder from his belt and inserted it into the main computer portal on the bridge. He had planned to keep this little surprise for tomorrow but there were so many things that could go wrong tomorrow. If he used his ace now, when it was least expected, he could win the game while everyone was still napping. He could take what was rightfully his.

Hux faced the holo projector and tapped the keys that allowed his projection to appear on all ships and decks.

“This is General Hux. Supreme Leader Kylo Ren has been taken captive on the planet below by the Jedi. He is considered compromised or dead from this point on. You will find in your systems Supreme Leader Snoke’s final order. Order number One-Two-Five. This order is to be carried out without delay. You do not need to do anything. This order will be carried out from the Supremacy.”

There were gasps around the bridge. Frightened faces turned towards him. Others were bemused and still others were calculating. Well, after today they would know who was in charge and who was not to be messed with.

“Yes General,” a voice beside him said. “I will analyse Supreme Leader Kylo Ren’s actions and location and confirm for you the validity of your assumptions.” Hux turned to the young officer and nodded in encouragement.

The voice of another officer rang out across the bridge.

“Yes, General, I will find the best method of execution and present it for action,” Ensign Geddi said.

“Yes, General.” The voices eager to comply with the order belonged to those who Hux expected they would. He pursed his lips and glared a challenge at Phasma, although he couldn’t quite keep the smile out of the corners of his mouth. His young elite were his shining example of excellence and obedience. Stormtroopers were less reliable, but these young people had received intensive training and they would do exactly what was required of them.

The first young officer spoke up again, his voice pleasingly professional and enthusiastic. “General, it is my belief that the Supreme Leader remains on the surface of the planet with the Jedi in a non-combative capacity.”

Hux raised an eyebrow as he continued to stare at Phasma. The young officer continued.

“General, it is also my belief that the actions of the Supreme Leader in the past day do not comply with First Order final directives.” Well, what do you know?

Ensign Geddi re-joined the military exchange with his conclusions. “General, it is my belief that a simple ion cannon pulse using the Supreme Leader’s locator beacon as a target will accomplish the most effective solution to order one-two-five.”

“Thank you all for your valuable input,” Hux said. He raised his chin and looked at everyone on the bridge.

About to give his orders he was interrupted by a newcomer to the bridge.

“General, I believe we should investigate the situation further before we commit to such drastic action.”

The voice of Admiral Savic behind him caused Hux’ lip to curl. He turned to face the weathered features of the Admiral.

“Order one-two-five cannot be rescinded and it is my discretion alone that determines its necessity.” Hux’s clipped tone shot back. Savic’s eyes narrowed and his lips pressed together but then he straightened his shoulders and glared at Hux.

“General, it was Supreme Leader Snoke’s discretion alone that gave the order legality. I do not believe that went to you when Supreme Leader Snoke…passed.”

Hux grinned. He was prepared for this little obstacle. He reached into a concealed pocket in his coat and drew out a second cylinder and placed it in the computer.

There was a collective gasp when a hologram of Snoke appeared on the bridge. The burning eyes swept over those present and settled on Hux. The gut reaction Hux experienced as those eyes bore into him, as though from the grave, unsettled him so much he almost leapt to the computer console to turn it off. He took a furtive breath and reminded himself it was only a hologram. The real Snoke was dead.

“General Hux.” Snoke’s image paused and leaned forward just enough to ensure the threat in his voice was meant in every way. Snoke smiled. Hux employed every effort to keep the bile from rising in his throat at the sight.

“I have confirmed my suspicions of Kylo Ren’s treachery. My young apprentice has a weakness. You know of whom I speak. Today I will ensure this weakness is forever removed from my apprentice.”

Snoke leaned back, his eyes became pinpoints of light that seemed to pierce his very soul, his ruined body wheezing slightly as he breathed.

“If everything should not go as I have foreseen then I have entered into the commands of the Supremacy the details of order one-two-five. It will ensure that Kylo Ren’s weakness and treachery be stopped should I be unable to deal with him myself.” Here the hologram appeared to twitch but, to Hux’s relief, it continued unnoticed. “I have given you discretion in such an eventuality.”

Hux turned to Savic. “Do you agree that Supreme Leader Snoke has given me clear discretion in ensuring order one-two-five is carried out when necessary?”

Savic’s eyes narrowed but he did not challenge Hux. That would be his downfall. The moment Kylo Ren was out of the way Hux would purge the First Order of all those whose loyalty to Ren could be…a problem.

“Officer Geddi, continue with your solution for order one-two-five.”

Geddi began tapping into his console.

A harsh female voice barked out over the bridge, causing everyone, including Hux, to jump.

“Please confirm authority to execute order one-two-five.” Hux shook off an odd feeling and keyed in the code he had kept hidden away in his mind for so long.

“Please accept my code and voice command,” he said.

“Thank you. This system acknowledges and accepts the information and calculations received. Locating target.”

“I hope you know what you’re doing,” Phasma bit out in hushed tones behind him. Hux raised his chin, keeping his cool in the midst of the increasingly panicked faces around him.

“General. Supreme Leader Ren’s ship has powered up and is now moving.” Hux turned to the young officer.

“Can you confirm the Supreme Leader is on that ship?”

“Sir, The Supreme Leader’s locator beacon no longer appears on my scope.”

The computer voice interrupted Hux reply.

“Reacquiring target to last known location.”

The hair on the back of Hux neck stood on end.

“Firing.”

A burst of green ion cannon fire shot towards the planet. Hux smothered the momentary terror that he had missed his target and spoke to Geddi in a carefully controlled tone.

“Report.”

Geddi’s voice was pleasingly matter of fact when he answered. “Everything on the surface over a two hundred meter radius from the impact point has been destroyed. For a further five hundred meter radius damage sustained was considerable and unlikely to be survived.”

Hux calmed his terror and euphoria and addressed the silent bridge.

“As the leader of the First Order Military forces I declare it is my duty to continue to ensure the power of the First Order remains intact to rule this galaxy.” Hux felt a thrill of victory as he spoke those words. His next statement nearly made him dizzy as the words floated from his lips.

“As such I will assume the duties of Supreme Leader until a more appropriate person is found for the title.”

And Hux would ensure he was the only one available who could be deemed appropriate for the title.


	9. The Ship In The Mountain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Ben, are you all right?” He wanted to hold her.   
> “I’m fine,” he said. He wasn’t. But then he was good at lying to himself, wasn’t he.  
> “They just tried to kill you,” she said.  
> He nodded. “Yes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to ColliderOfHadron for your help with this chapter. Your a great beta. Thank you also for your encouragements and kind words while I'm down with a nasty head cold. However, being sick is not going to stop me from posting stuff. Thank you also to DeVictory13 for your comments on chapter 8 as well. I hope you all enjoy this latest update.

Ben’s head ached worse than it usually did after one of Snoke’s ‘lessons’. Dust stung his eyes and powdered his throat, making him cough. A dim light flickered above, doing little to illuminate the scene around him. He pulled up his cowl to cover his mouth and nose. Had the Supremacy been attacked?

There were no claxon alarms, flashing red lights or shouting personnel. Instead, an eerie silence hung about them, broken only by the faint whirr and clunk of machinery. Ben forced himself to sit up and look around, but he barely got halfway before he lay back down with a groan. His head still hurt.

He blinked and tried to focus, his body tensing as he realised he wasn’t on the Supremacy, or any other ship. Through the rush of memories flooding back into his mind, he felt a familiar presence, and his heart flipped.

“Rey.” He craned his head to look for her. Panic rose inside him when he couldn’t find her.

“I’m okay, Ben.” Relief filled him at the sound of her voice behind him. He pushed himself up again, ignoring the pain in his head, until his eyes located her outline in the shadows. He glowered sullenly at her as realised that she was kneeling over the traitor where he lay on his stretcher.

Ben knew he was being an idiot, but it irked him that she’d looked over the betrayer first before she paid any attention to him. He pushed the thought aside - of course she would check on her friend first.

He tried to gain an impression of whether she was hurt in the recalcitrant lighting. He reached out to her in the force and detected no pain. Her hair was no longer tied up, now skimming about her face and neck in soft silken swathes, tempting him to run his fingers through it. He could make out a tremulous smile on her face as she approached him on hands and knees, his heart doing crazy things as he stared at her in the dim light.

“We only just made it inside before that cannon blast hit. I think we got hit with some of the blast wave before the door shut,” she said. She came close and in the flickering light he saw her gaze travel over him, before meeting his eyes. She crouched next to him and he noticed the dirty streaks across her cheeks, where dust had been smeared away from her eyes by hasty hands.

He instinctively pulled his cowl off and used it to clean her face, making her blink and shy away as he gently wiped away the dust. Realising what he was doing, he pulled back. Her initial surprise morphed into a wicked glint though, as she snatched his cowl and began wiping the dust off his own face with playful swipes. He remained still, resisting the urge to grab her and…

Rey stopped and handed him back his cowl. They both looked away, dazed by the sweet intimacy of their little game.

Ben took a breath and turned his mind to other events, the most important being that Hux had just tried to assassinate him. The door shielding them from the blast had, surprisingly, held. But only just. Whatever its construction, it was more than just sturdy. And possibly very old. Was it some kind of old rebel bolt-hole? It seemed older than that.

He also remembered that he’d sent his ship soaring off along the roadway in an attempt at a distraction. Perhaps it had given them a second or two. Perhaps not.

He remembered one last thing and grew still. He looked at Rey and saw the two little creases that formed between Rey’s brows as they remembered the same thing. Uncle Luke had been there too.

Damn, that old man _wouldn’t_ leave him alone. It always meant some kind of warning, as though Luke was trying to keep him alive. Although, after what he’d pulled on Crait, it kind of made sense. At least Ben wasn’t afraid anymore, or even annoyed... maybe he even liked that his uncle hung around to help him out every now and again. If his life depended on it. 

Rey didn’t look happy.

“He spoke to you, but he didn’t even _look_ at me,” she grumbled. Ben opened his mouth to say something sarcastic, when he felt the little trickle of hurt that ebbed through Rey for being ignored.

“Um, I don’t think Hux gave us much time for proper introductions,” he muttered. She nodded and turned away. Ben looked around for something to change the subject.

“What are you two talking about?” They jumped as they realised the boy was there. Rey and Ben glanced at each other, both understanding the need to end this particular conversation.

“Are you okay, Reif?” Rey asked. “Where were you?”

Reif waved a hand at the dodgy light above. “Just trying to fix a few things.” Fortunately he didn’t wait for an answer to his original question before he scampered off again.  

“What is this place?” Ben said.

Reif answered in the precocious tones of a child. “It’s some kind of old temple. At least that’s what Grim said. Sidebolt doesn’t seem to know.”

Ben looked about. The kid was fiddling with something on the wall but the dim light prevented him from discerning exactly what.

The flickering light went out and they were left staring into the darkness. Without thinking, Ben reached out in the force for Rey and she brushed reassuringly across his mind, a warm reminder of her presence. His relief was quickly followed by embarrassment at being a needy boy, afraid of the dark, but he felt no judgement from Rey. Perhaps she realised that it was the dark that had summoned the demons in Ben’s younger years, when Snoke would pursue him in earnest through the force.

As though it were an involuntary reflex he retreated into himself, afraid to show his weakness, but again Rey brushed against his mind with warmth, her caress a gentle breeze in his soul. He’d felt it before, at times when he’d been almost blind with despair and his breathing stopped as realisation grew inside him - she’d been there all that time and he hadn’t even realised it was her presence. He forced himself to breathe again as longing rose up inside him. Maybe he had known, but he just hadn’t been able see it. He’d risked so much for her and without her by his side his life had once again become intolerable, so he’d shut her out...

The flight flickered on again, but without improvement. The kid continued to tinker with what, Ben could now see, was a key pad which hooked up to an overhead light globe. He was about offer his help, when Rey’s fingers lay gently on his shoulder, vanishing all ability to think rationally as shivers of electricity shot through him. His heart staggered, but managed to regain its rhythm before its reaction betrayed the profound effects of her touch.

He let her take the floor and help the boy, and watched in silence as they worked together, un-phased that she had pre-empted his intentions, and happy to just watch her interact with the waif. A little ache of longing gripped him as he watched the two.

The overhead light stopped flickering and now illuminated the space with a brighter glow, the air also clearing as the hum of internal filters kicked in. Ben looked around as the lingering dust cleared away to reveal his surroundings.

A short corridor led into their mountain refuge, ending at another door. Stairs disappeared into the hand-cut, dark stone walls on either side of the corridor, one leading up and the other leading down. In spite of the obvious age of their enclosure, there was little sign of decay - no lichens or running water marks, just the mottling of time and…cleaning. Droids, of course, the kid had droids.  

A groan from the other side of the room punctuated the silence and Ben looked over at the prone form of the traitor as the man began to rouse in response to the light. The droid that had previously towed him to safety now dragged the stretcher towards the door at the end of the corridor. Ben got up and strode over to the end of the stretcher, looking down at the man who lay at his feet. He reached out in the force and gave the ex-stormtrooper a little tweak to return him to his slumber.

It had all started with him. A storm trooper who had been afraid and run away. And Ben had let him. Why? He’d asked himself that question too many times to want to know the answer any more. The trouble this stormtrooper had caused him! And yet, if it hadn’t been for this… _Finn_ , he’d never have met Rey. A pull in the force - that’s what it had been. A pull that seemed to nag at him even now, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to follow it again.

The kid let out a yip of success and the door in front of the droid slid back. Without acknowledging anyone, the surly droid trundled on through, dragging the traitor with him.

“You’re back. I was so worried.”

The electronic voice projecting from the other side of the door sounded like a protocol droid. Reif shot past Ben on light feet and disappeared inside. More lights and machinery started up as the boy passed momentarily from their sight. 

“Sidebolt. We need help. Finn here is wounded.”

“Oh. Oh, I see. Yes, we still have supplies here somewhere and I’m sure I can activate the medical bay.”

Rey moved ahead to follow Reif through the door, but Ben’s feet felt as though they were rooted to the spot. Rey stopped and turned back to him, as though she was waiting for him.

“Are you coming?” she said.

His doubts had started to grow the moment the inner door had opened and, as he now looked around, an oppressive realisation hit him – he just didn’t belong here. He was a malignant invader to this place, this boy’s humble home. It wasn’t that he felt he was too good for a place like this – it was that he shouldn’t have even been _invited_ in such a carefree way. He wasn’t really Ben Solo, as Rey wanted him to pretend, he was Kylo Ren. He was still the monster and his poisonous presence would destroy this kid’s world, because that’s what would happen if he stepped inside.

In fact he should go back out and see if his ship had survived the cannon blast.

“Ben.”

Rey had drawn close to him, her face full of tender concern. She shouldn’t be looking at him like that.

“Ben. What’s wrong?”

He tried to warn her off with a shake of his head but she only stepped closer to him. He backed away as he raised a hand and summoned the force to open the door.

“Stop!” The droid’s voice boomed from a speaker above the exit. “Do not go outside. It is still dangerous. I detect fires and contamination. Please come inside. I must seal the external chamber for safety.”

Ben hesitated. He had to get out or he’d destroy everything, but, despite applying his efforts with increasing urgency, the door remained locked. Anxiety stabbed at him anew and somewhere in his mind he recalled the intense power that fear was able to conjure. Kylo Ren rose up and pulled the force to him to use it against the doors.

Rey came to him through their bond, open and warm and gentle. Kylo trembled at the feeling of her presence in the force, calming his fears and his reeling emotions with a touch of her hand on his shoulder again. The dark power that always came with Kylo’s rise in his psyche withered as something bright warred against his anguish, leaving him exposed and vulnerable. He was a massive short circuit in the force and he didn’t know what to do about it.  He spun round to face her, lashing out without thinking.

“Don’t touch me! Leave me alone!”

She stepped back, hurt and confusion evident in her wide eyes, and searing pain instantly burned into him as if someone had taken a blow torch to his heart. He knew the suffering pummelling his inner self was an echo of her reaction to his rebuff, but it was the same for her too as she also felt his fears and frustration. Together they generated a maelstrom of fear and hurt that neither could bear.

Kylo withered and died a little more in the barrage of emotion, leaving Ben alone again to weather the storm.

“Ben. I’m…”

His barked words cut her off.

“Don’t say it! It’s not true.” He hated himself immediately for yelling at her like this, but he couldn’t help it. He didn’t want her comfort, he was the monster. It was the only way he could stop himself from breaking apart.

She lifted her chin and her voice was curt. “Ben, we have to go in. We’re endangering the others by staying here.”

With that, she turned and walked away. Oh yes, she was walking away from him like he should simply give up and follow, like…like the idiot he was – of course he followed her down the little corridor towards the inner door, not wanting to be left behind.

What was wrong with him? He’d lost it _again_! Without Snoke manipulating him, so much of his conflict had disappeared and he’d settled back into the familiar darkness of despair. Now she’d confused him by offering hope, and possibly something more. No wonder he was losing it.

The moment he stepped inside, the door shut smoothly behind him with a gentle but firm pressure seal. He felt as though more than just air and people had been sealed in and he slowly breathed in and out, calmly letting the force take his fears.

He surveyed his new surroundings, contemplating its unexpected appearance – it certainly didn’t look like any kind of temple he’d ever seen before. Its walls were made of something that looked like durasteel but of very old construction, slightly curved and segmented, as though it was built of compartments. If anything it looked like the internals of a light space going freighter. A ship! Inside a mountain... curiosity finally snagged his attention.

He was now standing in a different corridor, which connected to a central area ahead. Several rooms led off this corridor, but he didn’t pay them any attention as he followed Rey into what could only be described as a lounge, its various corners and miscellaneous surfaces littered with all kinds of junk that only a child would collect.

A shudder rocked him as the scene reminded him of his father’s ship. The lounge was bigger but lacked the streams of mangled wires and the dullness of battered surfaces. Actually, it looked like it received the regular attention of a cleaning droid, only to be junked again by the curious collections and boisterous activities of the boy who was their host. A smile snuck its way onto his lips as more old memories of Chewie and his father flitted into his mind, before he pushed them away. 

Grim had disappeared into a brightly lit room off the lounge area, towing Finn on the stretcher. Rey and Reif were following them, so he tagged along too and found himself in a med bay.

A gentle whirring sound ruffled the air and the shape of a droid’s head appeared, its torso and arms emerging from a bench next to what looked like a bed. Ben blinked in surprise at the curiosity. It was an interfaced droid integral to this…ship (it was the only way he could think of the place they were in). Despite the fact that the droid appeared to be tethered to the bedside counter by an assortment of wires and tubes, it also had the ability to emerge from one room to the next as though it moved within the workings of the ship to resurface wherever it wished. Its appearance spoke of ancient construction, with a smooth, matt-bronze surface, similar to a protocol droid but with a more streamlined exterior. Its eyes were blue and its movements were more organic than almost any droid he’d seen before.

“Quickly now. Put him on the bed,” the droid commanded. Metal arms co-ordinated with flesh arms to move the ex-trooper onto the bed. Ben used the force to add a little push as they hauled him up, causing Rey to peer up at him with a raised eyebrow. He turned away to continue inspecting his new surroundings.

Ben felt a tingling of recognition as though the force was trying to tell him something about the dwelling they now found themselves in. He opened himself to the force and found only a limited connection to it, as though the force inside the ship somehow cut him off from the force outside the ship. He grinned, it was as though the place was cloaked by the force itself. He would have to delve into this little mystery some more.

Finn was quickly ensconced onto the medical bed. The droids began to work on his wounds.

“It’s all right, master Reif,” the integrated droid ( _Sidebolt_ , he remembered) said. “We will take care of him now. You should offer your other guests some refreshments. It is the proper thing to do as a host.”

“Oh, right. Yeah, come this way, I’ll show you where the kitchen is.” Reif watched Finn for a moment, then waved a nonchalant hand for Rey and Ben to follow him back through the lounge and into another room that was obviously a kitchen. Another version of Sidebolt emerged from the kitchen bench - only, this time, it was silver with gold eyes. The voice was the same. It seemed Sidebolt had solved the problem of being in two places at once.

“Now, please introduce me to your friends, Master Reif,” Sidebolt said. Ben wasn’t sure he ought to be referred to as a friend – he should say he was Kylo Ren but…

The boy spoke easily as Sidebolt busily worked, of all things, a caf machine. Things began to feel surreal.

“This is Rey,” he pointed to Rey and smiled. “And…um, this is Ben.” Ben didn’t get a smile but at least the boy didn’t look at him with fear. It was balm he wasn’t used to receiving – to be spoken of as though there was nothing special about him, no-one to be afraid of.

“Finn is the one that you and Grim are working on in the med bay,” Reif finished saying.  

“Very nice to meet you, Sidebolt,” Rey said, as Reif handed her a cup of caf. Ben watched as she gave the boy another winning smile and marvelled at her easy grace and ability to be so disarmingly natural with almost anyone, in spite of her inner loneliness. He found himself enraptured yet again by her ever-hopeful and optimistic view of life.

While he’d been staring at Rey, Sidebolt had made another cup of caf, which Reif warily offered to him. Ben looked down and spoke gently, remembering what it was like to be intimidated by some of his mother’s overbearing visitors.  

“Thanks kid,” he said and took the caf, then froze. That had _not_ just come out of his mouth! It was the kind of thing his father would have said, calling someone ‘kid’. The boy even smiled up at him. Ben forced an answering smile on his lips as he recognised some of his own youthful naivety in the boy and, inconceivably, wanted to protect that.

The boy waved a hand towards the central lounge area. “Feel free to head back to the middle and put your feet up. I’m going to go and see what’s happening with Finn.”  The boy turned and rushed out of the kitchen, waving his hand towards a row of seats in the lounge that looked old, but seemed comfortable enough.

Stepping hesitantly into the living area, his mind began to spin. This morning he’d been on the Supremacy, commanding the galaxy, in despair but in control. Now, he was wandering the strange and obscure home of a waif he’d started to call ‘ _kid_ ’, with the woman he’d dreamed of almost every night since Crait, while she _smiled_ at him and looked concerned for him. It couldn’t be real! Somehow his fantasies had taken over and soon he’d wake up on the Supremacy, having been relieved of duty by Hux for some kind of…episode.

He had to focus. Hux had just tried to assassinate him…and that mattered…at least that’s what his rational brain was telling him. Rey’s presence always seemed to circumvent his rational brain. He felt as though he’d wandered out on a ledge which had duly crumbled beneath him, leaving him in free fall.

Except, he’d _chosen_ to be here. The moment Rey had called, he’d left his First Order life behind and chosen a new one. He just hadn’t realised it until now.

No, that was crazy. He was Kylo Ren, Supreme Leader of…of…kriffing nothing anymore.

He felt Rey behind him and spun to face her, stepping back to leave just a little space between them.

“Ben.” His real name again. How could he still be Supreme Leader Kylo Ren when she insisted on using his old name? When he couldn’t even tell a lonely forest waif who he really was.

Who was he kidding? He barely thought of himself as Kylo Ren these days. Kylo Ren wasn’t real anymore.

“Ben, are you all right?” He wanted to hold her.

“I’m fine,” he said. He wasn’t. But then he was good at lying to himself, wasn’t he.

“They just tried to kill you,” she said.

He nodded. “Yes.”

It didn’t matter. He sucked in a shaky breath as that last thought hit him again, this time at hyperspeed. It didn’t kriffing matter that Hux had just tried to kill him. He’d known what Hux was up to. What was different was that Ben had chosen to let it happen, because he’d chosen to be with Rey. Because he didn’t care about the First Order or being Kylo Ren any more. He didn’t actually care. He snorted incredulously. His _whole life_ had been about his destiny, ruling the galaxy. Now here he was, not giving a wamp rat’s ass about the galaxy. All he cared about was the girl standing in front of him.

The concerned look on her face only made him want to laugh more. In one smooth action he grabbed her about the waist, lifted her up and spun her around. She let out a shriek as her cup of caf went flying. He ignored it, he’d get her another one. He positively _beamed_ at her surprised face while he spun her around and…

…and it all came crashing down in a moment.

He was _still_ the murderer. His father’s loving face fell away into the void. He was still the monster who deserved to be alone. It wasn’t Kylo Ren who had killed his father. It was Ben Solo. His stomach cramped and he felt sick.

He stopped spinning, gently put her down and backed away, tears stinging the back of his eyes. That last image of his father played in his mind again, as it had a million times before. He had no right to be happy. No right.

The caf forgotten, Rey approached him with softly brilliant eyes, ablaze with compassion and darkened by sadness.

His world was spinning as his back hit a wall. He grasped at the force to give him calm, but this time it was like chasing smoke. He panicked and in desperation dove into the dark side of the force, determined to find the strength he needed to stay upright. He slammed his eyes shut and gritted his teeth. Fear, anger, hatred - let it all be power to him.

She touched his hand and he shivered at her caress. Sparks of heat and light spread through him from the contact, blazing through him in a startling wave of comfort that swamped his every fear. The dark side fled, leaving him weak and wondering. He opened his eyes to find her looking into his soul.

Her fingers were warm, gentle and calming; his racing heart began to slow. A thin sweat broke out over his skin in response to her tenderness and he remembered why he wanted her so much. She was the other side of his dark soul, the hope to his despair. The compassion to his vengeance. The love to his loneliness.

His knees buckled beneath him, bringing her with him as he slid down the wall, their gazes locked on each other. They fell into a heap on the floor together, a tangle of legs and arms. He didn’t resist when she pulled him against her shoulder. He didn’t know how long they sat unmoving, while Sidebolt quietly extended arms and utensils to clean up Rey’s spilt caf then disappeared into the insides of the ship.


	10. Kylo Ren Is Dead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "These past two years, even though we’ve been apart, I’ve still been there, waiting…because, you know, that’s what I do. I wait for people to come back. But, unlike my parents, you’re real. You’re worth waiting for."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, this chapter pretty much takes us up to where I was before in "Where I Belong". After this chapter there will be new stuff happening. Sorry it has taken so long to get back to where I was but I thought it was worth it seeing as @colliderofhadron has helped me so much to improve this fic (and keep me from making some silly mistakes). So, thank you @colliderofhadron for all your help with this. You're a great beta reader. Unfortunately, now that I have caught up, posts may slow down as I create new stuff. I will try and keep up with my posts as often as possible though.

Rey knew she was being sucked into the dark, exciting storm that was Ben Solo but from the moment she’d contacted him through the force, things between them had been moving at light speed and she wasn’t sure she wanted it to slow down. That undeniable bond between them just kept pulling them together and she didn’t want to fight it any more. They were both a mess under all the layers of power and propriety.

But she’d seen the flash of memory in his mind and her heart ached for him.

“You think of him often. Your father,” she stated, her voice soft to keep the sting from her words. His arms tightened about her as he buried his face in her neck. Rey could barely breathe, and not just because he was squeezing the air from her lungs. Being in his arms was doing crazy stuff to her insides, he was making it damn hard to keep her head together.

“I know you miss him,” her voice a whisper now. She felt his self-loathing rise and she held him as a shudder wracked his form.

 “I thought I could get rid of my past. I thought if I could be free of it I could be better, stronger, that all the pain would go away.” He snorted, a self-mocking sound that held only a fraction of the bitterness it covered. His eyes found hers.

“I killed Snoke for you. Because I wanted you.” He shook his head. “I should have killed him for my father. But I’m too selfish. My life is nothing without you.”

Rey’s heart swelled at the memory of what he’d done for her but it also ached with compassion at the misery he still felt about his father.

“I don’t know what to say, Ben. I wanted to be there for you. I wanted to help you, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t let my friends all die. I came to save them, too.”

Ben shuddered. “You can’t save me.” He pulled away from her embrace and leaned back against the wall again, his eyes dark and sad. He regarded her in despair.

“I was so sure you would stand beside me as we ruled the galaxy together. I forgot that…I know I hurt you. You ran away because I made you hate me for what I said. What I did.”

“Ben, I don’t hate you. You were the one person I could talk to about things I would _never_ talk to anyone else about. My life was a waste - an empty place. I couldn’t keep holding on to that story anymore. You made me see that. But the Resistance...” she looked directly at him, but he didn’t react. She decided against mentioning Leia as well, and continued. “They’ve been good to me. I believe in them. I can’t turn my back on them.” She reached out and tangled her fingers through the strands of his hair and looked into his unhappy face, his dark liquid eyes staring into hers. Despite their sadness, she saw a glimmer of hope shadowed within their depths, and continued.

“These past two years, even though we’ve been apart, I’ve still been there, waiting…because, you know, that’s what I do. I wait for people to come back. But, unlike my parents, you’re real. You’re worth waiting for.”

Ben remained silent as his soft, simmering gaze roamed her face, sinking to her lips then flitting back to her eyes. His hand found hers and their fingers laced together, but she felt his doubt and hope at war as uncertainty filled his eyes. Rey was worried the doubts would win, so she did something she wasn’t sure was right but at least it said something more than she could say with words.

She pushed her fingers into his hair, her thumb feathering along the curve of his cheekbone. His eyes darkened and his lips parted. She cupped the other side of his face with her other hand and leaned in, her pulse thrumming in her ears. She paused for moment, unsure of herself, until she felt the light pressure of Ben’s hand on the curve of her waist and the heat of his touch burning into her.

It was only meant to be a brief kiss of reassurance but when her lips brushed across his they both shivered and gasped as electricity sparked between them. Her eyes drifted shut as she leaned in to close her mouth over his, wondering at the softness as his lips as they moved against hers. She had once touched the fine velvet of one of Leia’s amazing gowns and it seemed his lips were more sumptuous than even such a rich fabric. She was a rough dessert girl, who hadn’t lost much of that roughness in her life with the Resistance. He felt like silk and fine leather and smelled and tasted like a sweet wine full of exotic scents and flavours. She wanted to drink him in, abandon herself to his embrace, his every touch while the beat of their hearts kept them in sync like the drums of a Tuanul star dance.

Rey’s head began to spin as Ben responded with equal hunger. He sat up and pulled her in. She reveled in the feel of his arms sliding about her, holding her to his broad chest. He cradled the back of her head as he crushed his mouth down on hers. She could have let him devour her right there.

They were interrupted by the bleating of an emergency comm call. The kiss stopped but they didn’t pull away, their lips hanging together as she felt Ben’s mouth quiver against hers. Rey would have ignored it, had the sound of running feet not come from the hallway. Ben loosened his hold on her and Rey pulled away, their lips parting as a sob seemed to escape him. She looked into Ben’s eyes and her heart stalled when she saw heat and hunger to match her own. She sucked in her bottom lip, biting it and tasting him there. She slid her hands from his hair, leaving it erotically disheveled about his beautiful face. It was all she could do not to throw caution to the wind and claim his voluptuous mouth again.

The emergency comm bleated again and this time Rey moved away, stifling a growl of frustration.

The footsteps stopped and there was a moment of stillness before Reif’s quizzical voice broke the silence.

“What happened?” He was looking directly at where Ben and Rey sat together next to the wall. Rey cast a quick glance at Ben and nearly died at how _kissed_ he looked. Rey took a steadying breath. At least it wasn’t Finn who’d nearly busted them. She was sure that Reif could see the heat swarming across her face but was determined to pretend that nothing was going on.

“Oh, Ben’s just a little tired.” She nearly died again at the breathy sound of her voice.

“Oh right.” The boy’s innocent helpfulness plucked at her heart. She didn’t dare look at Ben but she knew he was amused by her bad acting skills. “He can sleep on one of the bunks in there if he wants,” Reif continued, pointing to a room down the corridor.

Reif appeared to think nothing more of it as he bounced over to a wall panel, hit a button and brought up a console. Rey looked at Ben again and couldn’t help but fix at least some of the mess she’d made of his hair. The hungry look that returned to his eye unsettled her though and she drew back. She turned to watch Reif and what he was doing, needing the distraction, even though she could feel Ben’s eyes on her. She took a breath and refocused. She had pretty much figured out by now that they were in some kind of space ship, she just wasn’t sure how it got to be in the middle of a mountain. Or how the boy had so successfully rigged his own systems into it.

A hologram of another boy’s face appeared wearing a uniform that was familiar to Rey and Ben. Ben stiffened and sat up straight. The hologram boy spoke in tense and hushed tones.

“Reif. We have to get everyone on the link. Supreme Leader Kylo Ren is dead.”

“What?”

“Kylo Ren is dead. Hux is…this is bad. We have to get everyone together.”

“Um, yeah. That could take a while. It’s an unscheduled link. Where are you?”

“I’m on the Supremacy. We’re heading back to the rendezvous point. Reif, we need to speak with Temiri and Denea.”

Rey could feel it as Reif started working the console, his concentration intensifying and yes, he was pulling on the force. She looked at Ben and he looked at her. They both felt it.

“I’ll contact you again when I have everyone. May the force be with you,” Reif said. The hologram disappeared. The boy then busied himself entering commands into the comm unit to contact whoever these others were.

Ben sat up and took on a cross legged, loosely meditative posture. He regarded the boy for a moment but then pursed his lips as he spoke in a low voice to Rey. “Hux will have no mercy if he takes power,” he said.

Rey squared with him and looked him in the eye, also pitching her voice low for just the two of them. “You had no mercy up til now. How is this going to be any different?” His eyes slipped down and away, his face flaming as his mouth puckered, biting the inside of his lip. She’d noticed he did that when he was uncertain.

“I don’t deny I have made decisions that I…I had never thought I would make.” He breathed in looked up, his gaze still causing heat waves to swamp her being but there was an intensity that she could not turn away from. “There are many things I regret.” Rey wanted to tell him the same but the sadness in his eyes had her reaching for him to comfort him. He let her hand cover his, his thumb moved in a tentative caress along the side of her fingers. He took another breath, ragged at first but calming as his eyes narrowed.

“Hux’s only regret is that he did not kill me sooner. He wants power and he will rip the First Order apart to get it.” He pulled his hand out from under hers and pushed himself to his feet just as Reif finished what he was doing and turned his focus back to Rey and Ben, looking at them with wide-eyed interest.

“Ben, what are you saying?” Rey asked. He looked at her, his eyes narrowed and some of his old bitterness crept back into his voice as he spoke.

“If the Resistance wants to see the First Order fall then it should sit back and wait.”

 

 

Rose spread her fingers wide, stretching them, and then relaxed. Her nerves subsided only a little. She slowly reached out and entered the last of her commands into the computer and stood back.

“Ready for testing at your order General,” she said. Leia smiled and nodded. “Test away.”

Rose took a breath and hit the final switch to engage the new ship-wide cloaking device. It had taken her more than a year to finally hit the correct calibration of the kynear crystals, a stable synthetic crystal with similar properties to stygium and hibridium crystals. When she’d found the description of the technology in her mother’s tiny journal, one of the few things she and Paige had been able to rescue from their home, she had gone straight to the General.

There was a hum and then silence. She looked around, a stir of eagerness and trepidation causing little palpitations in her chest. The result of her hard work seemed entirely unimpressive, given what she had just done. She huffed and hit the comm.

“Commander Jolu. Run your decloaking scan.” A moment of silence. A scratchy voice came back.

“I still get a signature.”

Rose slumped. Leia looked down for a moment but then she turned to her and smiled, Rose saw the gentle sympathy in her eyes but knew it was a cover for the disappointment underneath. Rose shook her head and kicked the foot of the console in front of her in frustration. She was letting everyone down again. She had tried so hard to make up for everything that had gone wrong nearly two years ago.

A little green light blinked at her. Rose stared at it in disbelief for a second. How could she have been so silly? She flicked that one last switch and grabbed the comm again, hardly daring to breathe.

“Commander, can you run that scan one more time please.”

Leia blinked and sat back, holding her breath and it seemed to Rose that she was trying not to be too hopeful. The moments ticked away as, this time, Commander Jolu took his time getting back to her. Rose realised she was shaking as she reached for the half amulet about her neck.

This time Leia spoke into the comm.

“Commander Jolu. Did you hear us? Engineer Tico asked for one last…”

“Yes, yes.” There was excitement in his voice. “It’s working. I can’t detect anything. I’m still running different scans but so far they’re all coming up negative. The last one’s coming in now...” There was a beat of silence as Rose tried unsuccessfully to keep the smile off her face.

“The final scan is negative.”

Rose let out a whoop of pure joy.

“You’ve done it Rose! The ship is completely undetectable! No matter what I do. I can find no trace of it.”

The sound of applause made Rose blush. Without thinking she looked for Finn and felt a little disappointed knowing he wasn’t there. She touched her belly, well at least she had someone special with her. The little life in her chose that time to kick and she froze, flattening her palm to her stomach. Noticing her movement with concern, the applause also stilled. Rose grinned.

“He’s happy too,” she beamed. Laughter and more applause rose up again. Rose sat back down and looked at Leia and they shared a relieved grin. This new cloaking device meant everything. All it would take now was to get all their ships to modify and recalibrate the new device. This would likely take less than a day, once all the engineers had received their instructions. Best of all, the cloaking device thwarted the First Order’s active tracking abilities. The only way to track a cloaked ship was the old fashioned way, with a beacon, and that was only possible once they decloaked out the other side.

There was genuine happiness and, dare she think it, _hope_ , on the bridge. It was a triumph of engineering which would now enable heightened protection for the Resistance fleet, hopefully preventing  the horrific losses they had suffered over Crait when their ‘ _master code breaker’_ had betrayed them. When they’d been forced to accept the help of the wrong person and had nearly gotten everyone killed. Not that it was Finn’s fault. Finn didn’t know much about the way people were, having come from the First Order so recently. Rose, on the other hand, should have known better. Maybe now she could finally let go of her failure that day.

As though Leia knew what was in her thoughts she reached over and covered her hand and smiled. Rose felt her heart lighten a little more.

“General?”

Rose and Leia turned to see C3PO shuffling towards them. Leia frowned and stood up.

“Yes, 3PO.”

“A message has just come through one of my…err…channels.” The droid stepped closer to Leia and lowered his voice, but Rose could still hear what he said.

“I have yet to verify it but…General it says that Supreme Leader Kylo Ren is dead.”

All of Rose’s joy turned to ashes as she watched this final straw break the strongest woman she’d ever known.

 

 

Quick, precise steps rang out on the obsidian floor as the attendant grew closer to the massive doors at the end of the hallway. He struggled to quell the fear that spread its chilling tendrils up his spine, as he involuntarily thought about _who_ was behind those doors. He had a job to do and it was better to carry it out as efficiently as possible.

The soundless doors swung open as he approached. He continued his trajectory to the raised dais upon which a horizontal tank lay. It wasn’t just any tank though, its design had been painstakingly engineered for a specific purpose, its inner workings able to receive and sustain life, until the cloned body inside was ready to wield that life bequeathed to it.

“My Lord.”

The blue grainy light of a hologram appeared above the tank and grew, its size dwarfing him. He did not quite look up at the face above him, making it only to the embroidered neckline of the sumptuous robe his master’s image wore. The face that hovered above was no longer ugly to look at. It was those eyes. Eyes that knew too much about him. Eyes that saw him as a beetle to be trodden on if his master was displeased. Eyes that burned with a furious presence and an icy blue calm.

“Why do you disturb my rest?”

“My Lord. I have received notification that General Hux has used order one-two-five.”

His master was silent for a moment.

“Was the order successful?”

“General Hux has declared that Kylo Ren is dead and has assumed the title of Supreme Leader.”

His master sneered. “I will need better evidence than the presumptuous words of a fool.”

“Yes My Lord.”

A beat of silence.

“What news of the Jedi?”

“Hux claims that the Jedi was killed at the same time as Kylo Ren.”

His master closed his eyes for a moment, his face tilting upwards as if in search of something invisible. The terrible eyes opened again and settled once more on their servant.

“Summon the Knights of Ren.” A smile, as cruel as it was hungry spread across the humanoid face. “They will soon be reminded of their true master.”

The attendant paused, sensing his master wished to say something further.

“Darkness will rise again and this time there will be no light to meet it.”


	11. The Droid, The Girlfriend and The Apprentice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reif’s mouth dropped open and then closed. He frowned. “I could never be a Jedi...?” 
> 
> Ben chuckled. “You don’t have to be a Jedi to use the force.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this post is slower than usual but I am now working on new material for this fic rather than just catching up with the old. I hope you all enjoyed the kiss from last chapter - Rey and Ben certainly seemed to. I'd like to say a big thank you to @colliderofhadron for her help with this fic, tidying up my ideas and helping to make them clearer, and cutting out some of the guff, and generally being so encouraging. Your help is invaluable.

C3N1 had transferred from the Supremacy to the First Order’s new star destroyer, the Ascendancy, ahead of Kylo Ren and so had been left behind when the Supreme Leader had abruptly left the system. 

His instructions had been to prepare his master’s chambers, but the droid wasn’t sure what to do now. He had received reports that order one-two-five had been given and that Supreme Leader Kylo Ren had been declared deceased amongst the ranks of the First Order. A thorough check had been run to determine the validity of the report and he found the transmissions to be authentic. Added to that, the feverish whispers buzzing through the new ship’s corridors added more weight to the claim, and it seemed those reports were all the more correct.

Supreme Leader Kylo Ren was dead.

C3N1 had followed his master’s instruction and dispatched the cylinder containing the sensitive missive but, in spite of the disturbing news of his leader’s demise, he wondered if he’d acted too early. Perhaps he should have done more checking. Now, if he attempted to recall the cylinder or intercept it he would risk exposure, not only of himself but his couriers as well.

It was the medical protocols that had caught his attention, causing him to question the accuracy of the reports of Kylo Ren’s death. The systems in the Supreme Leader’s chambers included a subroutine that monitored vitals, both on and off the ship. C3N1 routinely processed this information as part of his programming.

The sequence that should have recorded the cause of Kylo Ren’s death wasn’t showing up. If the programme was working correctly it would have recorded something morbid, such as incineration, as his master’s final transmissions were transferred to the Ascendancy. The units responsible for these technical communications were small and durable, often lasting just long enough to send the information, in even the most drastic endings.

There had been no such transmission. Either the locator had somehow become detached from its wearer, or it had been damaged in some way - perhaps both. In either case, the readings would be blank. If this had been interpreted by an operator who only performed a cursory review, it may have appeared that the person being monitored was dead.

C3N1 reviewed the possibilities for this lack of transmission and was not able to identify a satisfactory answer. The final conclusion of his review was that there was indeed a possibility that Supreme Leader Kylo Ren was _not_ dead.

Perhaps it was the lack of information on the cause of death, or a capacity for independent thought his master had fostered by failing to carry out scheduled memory wipes, or both. Regardless, C3N1 was prompted to complete the implementation of all commands and subroutines, as per his master’s instructions, in case his life continued.

C3N1 set all command systems on the Ascendancy to waiting mode for confirmation from Supreme Leader Kylo Ren. Essentially, if Kylo Ren wasn’t there to press ‘go’, then the Ascendancy simply wouldn’t.

The protocol droid exited his master’s chambers, automatically making note of the swish and seal of the doors as they closed and locked behind him. C3N1 would not let his master down.

 

 

Rey could feel Ben watching her. It felt as though Kylo was watching her, too. Maybe the _real_ person was a mixture of both. This smouldering combination of gentle regard and dark hunger... it could make a girl’s head spin. 

Rey breathed in and out and focused her attention on Finn as he slept. Sidebolt and Grim had taken very good care of her friend and she was grateful for their intervention. If they hadn’t met Reif and his droids, her friend may not have fared so well. She sensed in the force that it wouldn’t take long for him to fully recover but of course, in spite of everything they’d done, there were things only rest could cure. Finn wasn’t going anywhere yet and so she wasn’t going anywhere either.

Rey needed to be there for her friend when he regained consciousness. She didn’t want him waking up the way he did last time: confused, worried and inclined to do crazy stuff when he thought he had to be a hero. Rose needed him to stay alive.

In spite of her good intentions, her curious mind drifted back to heated thoughts of Ben’s lips against hers. She knew she was hiding from the reality of that kiss, from how quickly it had gotten out of hand. She was certain she had only initiated it for altruistic reasons, to comfort, to show caring and compassion. To show him she didn’t hate _him_ , but that she was just mad with some of his decisions.

That kiss had set her ablaze faster than a canister of rhydonium fuel and a blaster shot. She still felt feverish. Every time she thought of his mouth moving against hers, his hands sliding around her back, waves of heat washed over her.

She tried not to look at Ben, a distracting and striking silhouette of black as he leaned casually against the wall on the other side of the medical bay near the door, but of course she failed. He looked like an indolent predator and, the moment she chanced an illicit peek at him, his gaze zeroed in on hers like two people in a mirror. The hint of a smirk playing around his full lips resurrected the cooling blush on her cheeks until she thought she might expire from her own fevered imagination. She took yet another surreptitious calming breath.

She could feel him though – staring at her with that barely concealed hunger. Nearly two years ago now, before it all fell apart, there had been gentle touches and reassurances…except for that one look right after the fight with Snoke’s red guards. The look that said he was going to come after her and devour her alive. That was how he was looking at her this very minute, and it was making her just as nervous now as it had then. 

Not the sort of nervous she felt when the Resistance was scouting out a new location or possible contact. Not nervous, like when she was edging around Poe’s digging about what really went down on Ahch-To. Or nervous about what was going to be served next in the cantina.

But the ‘she-could-do-something-crazy’ kind of nervous. Or the ‘she-might-not be-able-to-handle-that-kind-of-passion’ nervous. Or maybe she was worried that she _could_ handle that kind of passion and _would_ …do something crazy.

Like kiss the Supreme Leader senseless. Rey covered her eyes with a hand and tried not to groan at how imprudent she had been. 

No. Bad idea. Even without looking at him, she could still see the full curves of his mouth and those softly burning eyes, all mixed together with the exotic taste and smell of him…

_You’re thinking about that kiss._

Rey jumped, her hand jerking away from her face to stare at him. His still-hungry stare met hers and a hundred baby porgs fluttered about her stomach, their tiny wings rushing up to sweep the air from her lungs. She yanked her gaze away from his and stared at Finn’s bandaged wound instead, folding her arms across her chest. It was as though he’d spoken aloud... he may as well have. She’d been broadcasting _her_ thoughts like she had a loudhailer in her head.

_I can’t stop thinking about it too._

His voice was warm and ethereal in her mind, setting her pulse to hyperspeed and her blush to sizzling.

She felt a touch, a tender grazing of invisible fingertips across her bottom lip. She glanced across at him and saw dark hot mischief in his eyes as his fingers traced a line that mirrored the touch she felt gliding over her sensitive skin. Rey shivered, her eyes drifting half closed and her body sagging towards the medical bed as she revelled in that touch, it’s gentle pressure curving around to trace her top lip.

“I think it’s safe to go outside now,” Reif announced as he bounded noisily through the doorway. The touch disappeared as Ben dropped his hand and Rey nearly collapsed on the floor, dizzy with desire. She gripped the medical bed and tried to scowl at Ben for using the force to tantalise her so mercilessly, but neither could meet each other’s eyes under the innocent gaze of the boy.

 The awkward tension in the air was broken a moment later, when Ben spoke first. “Great. I should go and see what happened to my ship.” He turned to snatch up his cowl and hastily pulled it back over his head and shoulders. Rey chewed on her tingling lip, gawking at him as he flustered around for a moment before turning towards the door.

He turned to look back at Rey, his eyes offering an unspoken invitation to join him. She wanted to go, to talk, but without little ears listening in. She shook her head and looked down, ignoring that treacherous feeling of disappointment – besides, she didn’t want Finn to awaken whilst she wasn’t there.

“I’m coming with you,” Reif said enthusiastically. Ben raised an eyebrow as he peered down at the enthusiastic youngling.

“I thought you were waiting for your friends to call back.”

Reif frowned and then looked out at the comm in the main room. “We’ve probably got some time before they get back to us.”

“You go.” Rey said. “I’ll let you know if they call.”  A bit of breathing room would do them both good.

Ben nodded and directed a hint of a smile towards Reif, inclining his head towards the door. Rey observed a gentle curiosity in Ben’s eyes as he watched the boy run ahead, as though he’d found something special, and smiled to herself as she watched them leave.

 

 

The internal door whirred shut behind them. As reluctant as he was to leave Rey’s presence, if he didn’t give his lurid imagination a break he was going to go insane. She’d kissed him. She wanted him. Deep satisfaction at that knowledge conflicted once again with the annoying counsel to avoid attachments, ingrained in him by both Snoke and his uncle. To hell with the tedious restrictions of being a knight of the force! He smirked and promised himself there would be _more_ kisses.

The external door slid back and the dank scent of rain and charred wood wafted into the little foyer, the door’s sudden movement prompting rocks and debris to tumble noisily across the floor. Reif speedily picked his way over the blast debris as he rushed out, then stopped abruptly, his face slackening in wide-eyed dismay. Where once there had been a natural flat clearing in front of the boy’s front door, there was now a sunken blast crater wide enough for a TIE fighter to land in. Ben cringed as he watched the kid stare in horror for a while, guilt eating at him at the realisation that he had inadvertently been the cause of the potential destruction of the youngling’s home.

“I’m sorry, this is my fault,” Ben said, his anger sparking for the complete disregard Hux had shown for anything or anyone else on the surface of the planet. Just to kill him.

Reif looked up at the sky. “They must really hate you up there,” Reif said, with no trace of grievance as he looked thoughtfully back at the crater. Ben snorted derisively. 

“There might be a few people I don’t get along with.”

“Why would they want to kill you?” Reif continued, a wrinkle forming between his brows as he looked up at Ben.

“I think someone wanted my job.”

“Oh.” Ben watched the boy’s face contemplate this piece of information.  The young eyes looked up at him again. “What _is_ your job?”

Ben knew he should tell Reif the truth but he wasn’t sure he was ready to explain his life up ‘til this point and why Hux wanted to kill him.

“Not much really. I tell people what they need to do and they go and do it.”

“So, you’re the boss.”

Ben opened and closed his mouth and glanced sideways at Reif. He should have known he couldn’t get much past this kid.

“I guess so.”

“Why don’t you just fire the people you don’t get along with?”

Ben huffed. “It’s a bit more complicated than that. You can’t just fire everyone.”

Reif nodded gravely, as if deliberating a profound statement. Ben watched in silence, feeling his heart strings tug at the idea of the boy deeming his words worthy of such respect.

Ben and Reif stood together at the edge of the crater, surveying the new addition to the landscape. From their vantage point, it seemed that the damage was localised to the immediate area. Whatever fires had sprung up as a result of the attack appeared to have been doused by a heavy shower of while they’d been inside. He pulled off his cowl and luxuriated in the cool waft of recent rain mixing with the steamy heat of summer.

“We’d better find your ship,” the boy said.

Reif seemed to accept the disappearance of most of his front lawn, and nimbly clambered down through the crater and up the other side as if the hollow had been there forever. Ben followed him, somewhat cautiously, but his longer legs enabled him to easily catch up with the youngling and he then slowed his pace to keep in sync with the boy.

“Can I ask you something?” Reif said, after a period of comfortable silence.

“Sure.” Ben said, preparing himself for more queries about where he’d come from as he looked at the kid, so full of questions. He wondered if he’d been like that at the same age.

“Is Rey your girlfriend?”

“WHAT?” Ben nearly choked on the word. He stopped and stared down at the boy. “I mean, what makes you say that?”

Unperturbed by Ben’s reaction, Reif just grinned and shrugged matter-of-factly. “She looked like she was going to kiss you before.”

Ben chewed on his lip in an attempt to keep the smile off his face. “Oh.”

“I think you should kiss her.”

Ben coughed. “I’ll keep that in mind.” Yes, he would be kissing Rey again, soon. When he could get her alone.

There was one problem though.

“What if she likes FN…Finn better than me?” he asked, a conspiratorial note in his voice.

“Nah.” Reif shook his head vigorously. “Besides, I heard Finn mumbling about someone called Rose when he was asleep before.”

Ben slowed, his heart skipping a beat. “Ah, what did you say?” A giddy sense of something like hope rose up inside him. If Finn was in love with someone else, perhaps Rey might just consider Ben’s feelings for her worthy of consideration. Sure, he could tempt her with kisses all he liked, but if Finn wasn’t there as a better option then perhaps…

Ben realised Reif hadn’t answered him, instead he was pointing down the road. “Is that your ship?” He followed the boy’s gaze and saw the Silencer, tipped on its side against the trees beside the road. At first glance, it appeared to have been left relatively unscathed by the attack, but Ben wouldn’t confirm that initial assessment until he’d properly looked it over. He marched along the road, Reif jogging eagerly along behind him.

When they reached the Silencer he noticed Reif’s wrapped expression as he gaped and walked reverently around the ship. Ben guessed this was the real reason Reif had wanted to accompany him. He smiled. He would have been the same.

“I’ve never seen a ship like this before! You must be a good pilot to have a ship like this,” the boy said in awe.

Ben was proud of his fighter and his skills.

“Sure, but this craft’s mainly a perk of being the Boss.” Reif looked suitably impressed. Ben wondered whether he should take the child on as an apprentice. A sense of guilt and anxiety nagged at him at the thought of what Rey might say about that. Especially if Reif showed a penchant for the dark side. But then, maybe together they could teach him.... Wisdom from both the dark side and the light. It was something to think about.

Ben returned his focus to the condition of his ship, his face adopting its usual scowl as he appraised the fighter seriously. He was amazed that it wasn’t as badly damaged as it could have been: the top left wing tip was bent, there were a few wiring shorts in the cockpit display and a crack in the transparisteel cockpit side window. The main thing that had saved it was that he’d left it running when he’d first landed - the shields had still been on standby and the moment cannon fire had been detected they had activated.

He could fix the bent wing tip and the damage to the wiring. The crack in the cockpit window would be trickier, though. For now he just needed to get it back in the right position and move it somewhere easier to reach the various parts of the ship so it could be worked on. The cleared area in front of Reif’s front door would have been ideal, if it didn’t have a massive blast crater in the middle of it now.

Looking around, Ben decided that the hill appeared to be the best location. Less likely to be spotted by unwelcome eyes. He breathed in, and closed his eyes and focused, picturing his ship turning back to an upright position and then floating back towards the hill.

“What’s happening?” Reif shouted in excitement and confusion. Ben ignored him as he continued to concentrate, force pushing the ship back towards the hill on which he’d first landed. He heard footsteps crunch across the gravelly road as Reif started to run after it.

“It’s moving on its own! Hey, Ben it’s…wait…Ben!” He could hear the boy’s excited gasps as the ship rose up into the air. Ben opened his eyes as the ship hovered for a moment at the top of the hill then settled gently back down on its original landing place.

“What did you…that was _you_ wasn’t it? You did that! You’re a Jedi!” Reif babbled excitedly. Ben took a steady breath and turned to the boy. Ben regarded the wide eyes looking up at him and for a moment saw the myriad of possibilities and, against all good sense, hoped he might be able to guide him towards those possibilities.

“You could learn to use the force to do that too if you wish.”

Reif looked at him like he’d grown an extra head.

“What?”

Ben felt compassion for the boy, knowing his ability with the force could be a joy or a curse, but to leave him untrained would be a grave error.

“I’ve already felt it respond to you. Rey has too.”

Reif’s mouth dropped open and then closed. He frowned. “I could never be a Jedi...?”

Ben chuckled. “You don’t have to be a Jedi to use the force.”

Reif’s eyes opened wide and he nodded in the direction of the ship. “You mean do stuff like that?”

“In time, yes.” Reif looked at Ben as if he’d just seen the most wonderful vision of his life.

His awe was quickly marred by a frown. “Wait. I would have to leave here and go with you, wouldn’t I?”

“Yes.”

Reif chewed his lip and looked down.

“I think we should go back now,” Ben said gently. “Your friends will be calling soon.” Reif nodded, the ship forgotten for now.

It hit Ben that there was something he’d totally missed while he’d been dealing with his new situation.

“By the way, how is it you have a communication link to that boy on the Finalizer?”

Reif’s eyes widened for a moment and he swallowed apprehensively. Ben could feel his turmoil. An unmonitored communication link from the Finalizer would be almost impossible. Almost. But it wouldn’t surprise him if a force-sensitive child had managed to find a way.

On the other hand, perhaps the communication _had_ been monitored and deemed unworthy of concern. Hux encouraged a certain amount of independence – provided it complimented his schemes or conformed to his training program for youngsters.

Reif’s answer didn’t exactly clear things up.

“Oh. You know. Just the holonet.” He shrugged vaguely. “We hang out on the link and talk about…stuff.” Then, without warning, Reif sprang forward in a sprint and yelled over his shoulder. “Race you back home!”

Ben watched him for a moment, a frown on his face. Reif had been disarmingly open and honest up until now. He started to jog after the boy, letting him stay in front while he mulled over this new information. This was something he really should look into...

...except he wasn’t the Supreme Leader anymore. He’d been fired, literally. What was it to him if a few kids were chatting on unsanctioned frequencies?

Still, it was a thought that buried itself in the back of his mind, waiting for him to make the link to something he didn’t yet know. There was something about the Force here that mystified him…and warned him.


	12. Conference Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Okay, so if Kylo Ren is dead, who is that out there…and why does Reif call him Ben? You’d better start explaining things because I’m not following the bit where this is okay with the Resistance and…and…” His eyes narrowed. “Are you holding him captive in some way? Like, in some Jedi way?” A cunning smile began to play at the corner of Finn’s mouth. “Is this going to benefit the Resistance because…”
> 
> “No-one’s holding anyone captive, Finn.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so the kids get to have their say and everyone gets to hear an honest appraisal of Kylo Ren as Supreme Leader. Thanks again to ColliderofHadron for your help in making this chapter make more sense. What would I do without you.

Rey sat next to Finn’s bed as she fiddled with the graflex she’d bought from the marketplace earlier, measuring it up for the lightsabre.

She realised it would work much better as a casing for the works but, whatever she did, she would still only have half a crystal. She had previously tried to find a replacement, but had failed, and had then attempted to modify the inner workings of the lightsaber to take a broken piece of the original, but that also hadn’t worked. It was the whole thing or nothing. Frustrated and thwarted at her fruitless attempts to fix it, she had then thought about making her own new lightsaber instead, by using one piece of the crystal, without success. It was almost as though the force was insisting that she had to _mend_ the broken crystal…the one that she and Ben had broken…

Rey looked up as she felt him return from his outside exploration. She slipped the lightsaber parts back into her satchel and checked on Finn again. His eyes flickered. Hope rushed through her.

“I think he’s coming around,” Rey said. Sidebolt looked down at Finn as it leaned over him. 

“Yes. He seems to be healing well.”

Reif scampered into the room and stood next to her, a grin peeking through his serious expression. Rey got the impression that the next few moments were going to be very important.

“Ben says he can teach me to be a Jedi.”

Rey froze. She looked up at Ben, wishing she had been able to fix her damn lightsaber. She was going to kick his ass. Actually she was going to grab his saber again and run him through with it and _then_ kick his ass. Of all the things to promise a kid…

“I knew it. You don’t think so. That’s alright. I wouldn’t be much good at it anyway,” Reif said quietly, the wonder in his face evaporating as he cast his eyes towards the floor. Ben scowled at her. Rey was slammed with guilt at the thought that she’d just crushed the poor kid’s hopes.

“No, wait…what I...” Rey blurted out. “Reif, being a Jedi is not an easy path.”

The wan smile Reif gave her belied the doleful look in his eyes. Why did Rey suddenly feel like she was the bad guy here? Rey put as much effort into glaring at Ben as she could, only to find herself wishing he didn’t look so damn handsome when he smirked at her like that.

_We will talk about this._

Too right they would.

Reif’s expression changed to one of concern and pushed closer to Finn, looking into his face. “Hey, he’s waking up.” 

She turned back to Finn and found he was indeed waking up. She watched his sleep-heavy eyes blink several times, before being able to focus enough to take in his surroundings.  When he saw her a tiny smile stretched his lips, but his face quickly became clouded with concern.

“Rey,” he croaked. “Are you all right?”

Rey smiled softly. “I’m fine. It’s you who got shot up by the First Order.” Finn grimaced then his face grew concerned again.

“Where’s the kid?” he asked, lifting his head to look about but laying back down with a hiss of pain. Reif popped his head around Rey’s side.

“Hey kiddo,” Finn managed to say. “You did a good job. Thanks.” Reif’s shy smile turned into a full sunbeam as he crept closer.

Rey smiled at the boy. He really hadn’t taken much notice of her. Instead he was smitten with the two men that had suddenly appeared in his life. She understood the feeling. Now he had not one, but two father figures. Her smile grew tight, she hoped it wasn’t going to get awkward when Reif found out how much the two men hated each other.

Finn stiffened, alarm spreading across his face as he looked around the room. “Where is he? Did we get away?” He tried to push himself up off the bed but Sidebolt put out a hand to push him back down. This time Finn’s face paled as he caused himself more pain with his movements.

“You’re recovering well, sir, but you are not yet fully healed. That will be another day yet,” Sidebolt said as he raised the head of the bed up so Finn was closer to a sitting position.

Finn didn’t look any less likely to leap out of bed, so Rey put a hand on his shoulder as well.

“Mind what the droid says, Finn. You need to rest until tomorrow.”

He fixed her with a suspicious scowl. “You’d better not use the force on me to make me go back to sleep,” he grumbled.

Rey shook her head. “I’m trying to rely on your good sense.”

Finn glowered at her for a moment then rolled his eyes. “All right. But I swear…”

The central comm beeped, making Reif jump and holler as he ran out. 

“That’s them! Hey Ben, do you want to meet the others too?”

Ben’s voice came through from the other room. “Probably better not to mention we’re here.”

Rey winced as she caught Finn’s horrified reaction.

“Finn. It’s ok. He promised to let you go. And, well, there’s a few things you need to be filled in on.”

Finn pressed his lips together in a flat line. “Like what? That Kylo Ren is really a nice guy under all that murder and galactic domination?”

 Rey shook her head.  “No. Kylo Ren is dead.”

“Rey, I don’t care what you…wait…what?”

“Hux, nice guy that _he_ is, nearly incinerated us all by firing an ion cannon blast on our location. We only just made it inside before it hit. If this place hadn’t been so well fortified we’d all be ashes by now,” Rey explained carefully. “Of course the next thing we heard was that Kylo Ren had been pronounced dead. Reif had a call from a…friend on the Finalizer.”

 As Rey spoke the words, her mind was also tackling the same issue that Ben had been contemplating earlier, namely, how a random kid on a random planet in the outer rim could be in contact with one of Hux’s young trainees on the Finalizer.

Finn remained focused on the real question at hand.

“Okay, so if Kylo Ren is dead, who is that out there…and why does Reif call him Ben? You’d better start explaining things because I’m not following the bit where this is okay with the Resistance and…and…” His eyes narrowed. “Are you holding him captive in some way? Like, in some Jedi way?” A cunning smile began to play at the corner of Finn’s mouth. “Is this going to benefit the Resistance because…”

“No-one’s holding anyone captive, Finn.” Rey would have whacked him on the shoulder if all the bacta packing around his middle wasn’t a clear reminder of how unwelcome that would have been.

She sighed. “We made a truce so that you can go home, but then Hux blew everything up and well…we’re still working things out…I don’t know what to think yet but at least he hasn’t gone running back to the First Order.”

“And, yes, call him Ben,” she continued. “I don’t want you to confuse Reif with names. This kid is our host and we’re going to play nice.”

Finn laughed without mirth. “Play nice. Are you joking? First, Kylo Ren does _not_ play nice. Second, he’s the enemy. Third, I don’t trust Kylo Ren where you’re concerned. I know he’s trying to…to…I don’t know… _seduce_ you…to the dark side…or something.” Rey looked askance at him, crossing her arms.  She got the impression that Finn was hedging around something he was reluctant to express, but she had to admit he was right in just about everything. Except that Ben wasn’t quite the enemy right now.

Finn’s face set into a belligerent look. “And I am not going to call him Ben.”

“Finn, I see you’re awake.”

Finn and Rey both jumped at Ben’s voice as he suddenly appeared at the doorway, his body like a wall that made Rey feel trapped in the med room. She wasn’t sure if Ben realised the daunting effect his appearance had on people, or her specifically. He strolled forward a few steps, his presence intimidating in spite of the amiable expression on his face.

“I promise to call you Finn from now on if you call me Ben.”

Ben folded his arms and stared at Finn, a challenge in his eyes, while Finn glared back, the hard line of his jaw topped by a scowl of disapproval. Finn hissed something under his breath and began twisting one way then the other as though he were searching for something. With the arm on his good side, he snatched up a sharp looking instrument from Sidebolt’s medical tray and flung it like a dagger at Ben.

Ben caught it in one swift motion then swaggered nonchalantly over to the bed, tossing the implement back on the tray. If a droid could look shocked then Sidebolt definitely achieved it. Grim made a rude chortle. Rey let her face sink into her palms, but looked up quickly as Finn shifted, and winced in pain from a renewed attempt to get off the bed, which was circumvented by a hand from Sidebolt, again.

Finn ground his teeth, pointed an accusing finger at Ben and snarled, “I will not let you win, _Ren_ …”

“Ben.”

“Whatever! I’m not scared of you. We _will_ escape and…”

“I’m not holding you captive,” Ben said, his face expressionless as he stepped back to allow easy access to the doorway.

“ _I’m_ talking here, not you,” Finn hissed. “I don’t know what false promises you made to Rey but I will not be taken in. I know who you are…”

Finn’s fuming was interrupted by an exasperated boy at the door. “Are you guys coming or what?”

Everyone fell silent and at least pretended to look as though they hadn’t just been arguing. Reif skipped over to Sidebolt. 

“Can Finn come? They’d really like to meet a real Resistance hero,” he pleaded. Ben coughed and rolled his eyes. Finn glared at him.

“As long as he doesn’t make any more sudden movements,” Sidebolt said, clicking in disapproval. “You can move the bed in there if you like.”

It didn’t take much to unsecure the bed and guide it through the door, past the various bits and pieces Reif had left on the floor, to the main lounge. Finn wouldn’t let Ben touch the bed or get anywhere near it.  Ben acquiesced, more than happy to stay leaning against the back wall, to avoid being seen in the holo-projection.

“I think it would be best if I stayed out of the way,” he muttered. Reif’s brows wrinkled in disapproval though.

“No. We have a rule. If you want to listen in or speak then you have to say who you are.”

Finn spoke up, pointing at Ben. “I don’t think he should be here for this, Reif. He’s not who you think he is.”

Reif scowled. “The First Order tried to kill him. He has as much right to be here as anyone else.”

Finn didn’t look convinced. “Yes, but…” Finn’s eyes widened as a new realisation dawned on him. “Wait a minute, who are these kids? Why are you speaking to the First Order? Rey, are you seriously going to speak to First Order trainees?”

Reif shushed them. “It’s okay. They’re part of the Resistance too.”

Rey raised an eyebrow. She was pretty sure the Resistance hadn’t recruited any children into their numbers. Especially children in the First Order. The opportunity to gain some real intelligence about what was going on in the First Order couldn’t be passed up though. She was willing to see how this panned out for now, but had every intention of holding Ben to his promise of getting Finn (and now Reif) out of here and safely back to the actual Resistance. In the meantime, she would take whatever information she could get about whatever turmoil Hux’s coup had stirred up within the ranks of the First Order.

Finn was watching her thoughtfully and she saw the realisation dawning in his eyes – he knew what they would be giving up if they didn’t participate. Ben’s eyes also narrowed as a wary curiosity lit up within him, only to be shut down a moment later, as though he didn’t want to care.

A holo-projection of two children, probably in their early teens appeared in their midst. They were dressed in ragged clothes and obviously not from the First Order. The boy had a weathered cap on while the girl sported frizzy red hair.

“Reif. Hi, I’ve got Feanaa with me.”

“Hi Temiri. I’ve got three with me. They’re from the Resistance - Finn and Jedi Rey. I also have Ben. The First Order just tried to kill him. He’s with the Resistance now, too.” Finn glared at Ben and Ben smirked back, and Rey shook her head in exasperation at the two men. Finn huffed and turned back to the holo-projection, while Ben folded his arms across his chest and pasted a faintly interested smile on his face as he returned his focus to the image flickering in the centre of the room.

“Did you say Finn and Jedi Rey?” Feanaa stepped forward, a squeak of incredulity in her voice and her eyes wide.

“Yes. We can ask them anything we want to.”

“We know Finn! He was at Canto Bight,” Temiri said, an excited look in his eye as he looked at Finn. “Hey, where’s Rose? Look, I’ve still got the ring she gave me!” The boy raised his hand to show them.

“Good to see you again Temiri. I’m glad you’re with us. Rose is back at our base. I’m sure she would have liked to see you both though,” Finn said. The two from Canto Bight beamed in reply.

Two more holo-images emerged in the central room, cramped together as they peered in at their holo-projector. They wore junior First Order uniforms and one was the boy who had spoken to Reif in the original call from the Finalizer.

“Reif. Is everyone there yet? It’s me and Leesh.”

“Hi Rada. Temiri and Feanaa are in the link. I have three with me. Finn and Jedi Rey are from the Resistance proper and Ben. Um, the First order tried to kill him and now he’s in hiding with us. Also we’re still waiting for Denea…Oh wait.”

One last holo-image emerged. A girl whose eyes sparkled with mischief while her countenance exuded a toughness that made her appear both old and young all at once. Rey could see in her the wise and wary look of someone who had had to survive in the same brutal way she had.

“Hey Reif. Is everyone here?”

“Temiri, Feana, Rada and Leesh are all in the link and now you. I have three new people with me though. Finn and Jedi Rey are from the Resistance and also Ben – the First Order just tried to kill him in a big way so he’s on the run now.” Rey looked at Ben, worried at how Reif’s telling of Ben’s story seemed to get a bit more added to it each time, but Ben remained mute, making no effort to speak for himself. She reached out to him across the bond and his words entered her mind like a whirlwind.

_You wanted me to be Ben – so I’m going to be Ben, in hiding and on the run from the First Order_. His dark eyes held a challenge but a stab of guilt came across the bond that he couldn’t disguise. Rey bit her lip as her own uneasy feelings about concealing Ben’s identity rose up to meet his.

Finn on the other hand was busy watching the two First Order younglings, a far-away expression on his face.

Denea leaned forward to peer at Finn and Rey then sat back. “Wow, you two are for real. I’ve seen you on bounty hunter posts.”

Finn looked at Rey. They both looked at Ben.

_Hux_ , Ben said across the bond as he kept his face impassive.

“Hey wait a minute. Are you saying we’re talking to real Resistance heroes?” Rada blurted out as Leesh gasped. The two boys also leaned closer, eyes wide.

“Where did they come from?” Rada said.

“Does this mean we’ve been recruited into the Resistance now?” Leesh questioned.

“As far as I’m concerned we _are_ part of the Resistance,” Denea snapped.

“Of course we’re Resistance! We resist the First Order and so we’re Resistance,” Temiri stated.

“Wait a minute.” Reif raised his voice to get their attention, putting his hands out in a gesture of quiet. “Rada. What’s going on? You said that Supreme Leader Kylo Ren was dead.”

Rada opened his mouth to speak but then he and Leesh looked away for a moment and were quiet. Everyone waited until they turned back.

“Sorry. It was just a laundry droid,” Leesh said. Rada continued.

“I was on the bridge for one of our excursions when they took the shot. Hux said the Supreme Leader was compromised or something, that he’d been captured by the Jedi and they had to enact order one-two-five. I’d never heard of it before.” While most eyes were on Rada, Rey noticed that Reif’s eyes wandered to Ben for a moment and saw a light go on. She suspected Ben had just been busted but Reif kept quiet, for now.

Rada continued to speak. “All the officers seemed to know about it. Phasma didn’t like it but she did as Hux ordered. Admiral Savic tried to question the order but he backed down too.” Outright fear crossed Rada’s face. “It’s not like when they killed Snoke. People are already dead, although I don’t know how Savic isn’t. Hux is ordering Phasma to kill the people he doesn’t like. We’re scared.”

Rey glanced at Ben. If he was angry, he wasn’t showing it. She could feel nothing, he was closed off again.

There was a brief moment of silence and Denea took that moment to have her say, her voice full of sarcasm. “So if Kylo Ren is dead, let us all rejoice,” she said.

“No Deanea. This is bad,” Rada said. “Hux doesn’t care about us or anyone. Kylo Ren might have been scary and did some bad stuff but Hux doesn’t care if we all die.”

“Kylo Ren doesn’t care if you all die either. He just wants everyone to bow to the First order.”

“No. That’s Hux. Kylo Ren was bad, yes, but at least he was willing to spare lives. You know it was Hux who ordered the destruction of the Hosnian system. I’m not defending anything Kylo Ren has done, but Hux is a maniac. They’re saying he’ll rip the First Order apart from the inside because all he wants is power.”

“Oh, and Kylo Ren didn’t?”

“Reif,” Temiri said. “From everything I’ve heard on Canto Bight, Kylo Ren was only interested in tracking down the Resistance. Hux was running the First Order anyway.”

“Kylo Ren wants…wanted to rule the galaxy. Even if we didn’t like him at least he kept the First Order under control after Snoke,” Rada said.

Rey had been watching each of the children as they spoke but cast a quick glance at Ben, wondering what he was feeling. Every now and again she would get a hint of confusion, anger and surprise all mixed together but he was keeping his shields up and she didn’t want to push past them and damage the bit of trust she had worked so hard to gain. Instead she just offered her warmth across the bond. He appeared to feel it as he looked at her, a wan smile on his face, but he was intent on keeping himself closed off, so she let him be for now. 

Denea was speaking again, her superior tone full of cynicism. “Oh, I don’t know. I’ve heard that there are divisions in the First Order. There’s more than one maniac as bad as Hux with big ideas for themselves,” she said. “It’s only because Kylo Ren is good at crushing the galaxy beneath his boots that they follow him.” 

“And where did you hear that?” Leesh argued. “Your Proxima friends?” Leesh made a face at her. “I bet you repeat everything they say.”

Denea glared at him, her fists clenched.

“Come on guys. Don’t waste time arguing,” Reif said. “We should be talking to Finn and Rey about the Resistance.”

“Exactly,” Temiri said. “Finn and Rey, what do you think will happen now that Kylo Ren is dead?”

Finn looked at Ben then at Rey. Rey decided it would be better to let Finn speak - she wanted to know what was going on with Ben.

Except that Ben beat them to it.

“Denea is right. The First Order was already ripping itself apart before today. Hux doesn’t have the power to hold it together. There are others waiting for their opportunity, especially Savic. No doubt Hux is trying to kill off his rivals, but there are too many.” Ben was looking at Finn as he spoke. “If you want the First Order to fall then I suggest you step back and let them rip it apart themselves. Then you can pick off what’s left bit by bit.”

There was a look that passed between Finn and Ben as though they understood each other far too well on this point. Rey had a feeling that if those two were on the same side they’d be a dangerous force to come up against. It seemed that both Ben and Finn were more than a little horrified by the same realisation, as they tried to look anywhere else but in each other’s direction. Rey bit her lip to suppress the wide grin that threatened to spread across her face.

“Wait. What about us?” Leesh said. All eyes turned to the young First Order boy but it was Finn who spoke.

“The Resistance will help anyone who wants to leave the First Order. I know that for a fact.”

“How do we leave? From what I’ve heard you nearly didn’t make it out, Finn, and there were executions nearly every day after you got away.”

Finn’s mouth dropped open, shaken by the thought that he’d been the catalyst for the death of many others who tried to follow him.

“Finn’s not the only stormtrooper who made it out,” Denea said. “I know of others who did too. There are some here who work for Proxima now. Though, to be honest, I don’t know if that’s any better.” Rey couldn’t help noting the haunted look in her eyes at that moment.

Rey felt compassion for the youngsters trapped within the First Order though, the fear growing in their eyes was obvious. “When Finn and I get back to the main Resistance base we will talk to General Organa about finding a way to help you leave. I’ll do all I can to help you.”

Leesh pushed forward to speak again. “You know that Kylo Ren was looking for anyone who has the force, like us. I know we’re supposed to hide but maybe if he’d found us we could have helped him because now Hux is going to kill everyone he thinks has the force. He doesn’t want another Kylo Ren to take over. We need to get out of here fast.”

Rey saw Ben stiffen and look at the holo-projected faces about him, his mouth working as though he didn’t know what to say. Reif looked at him, an uncertain expectancy in his eyes. Ben looked away for a moment, lost in thought before he turned back and grew impassive again. There was something strange here she needed to talk to Ben about.

There were some things Rey really needed to know, though. “Leesh, you said all of you have the force. Did I hear that right?”

Reif spoke up instead. “It’s how we found each other. I did something with the temple right above us and it turned on a force link. You can only find it through the force and a modified comm. Once you know how to do that, you can link in.”

“I was the first to find it,” Temiri piped up.

_Well that explains a lot_ , Ben said in her mind and Rey found herself agreeing.

Ben turned to Reif again. “Would you teach us how to find this link?” he said.

“No,” Denea barked. “You have to find it yourself.”

Rada raised a hand and shushed them. Leesh glanced nervously over his shoulder.

“We have to go,” Rada said. The two First Order boys disappeared.

There was silence for a moment.

“They’ll be okay,” Temiri said. Rey looked at the boy from Canto Bight and wondered how he knew this. She opened herself to the force for a moment and its murmurs seemed to say that the two First Order boys would indeed be safe – at least for now. Did Temiri have a natural ability with foresight? This was something she would need to explore further.

Denea huffed and looked regretful. “I wish we could do something to help them.”

“We will,” Temiri said. “When we’re old enough we’re going to join the Resistance proper and we’re going to stop the First Order from ruining this galaxy any more.”

“Well, now that Kylo Ren is dead and Finn and Jedi Rey are here with us we have a chance. We can learn the force like we were supposed to and help the Resistance like the Jedi would have done in the past,” Reif said. Rey wasn’t sure where this was leading but she knew their hopes needed to be managed. She glanced at Ben, and swallowed when she saw the speculation in his eyes…and as for Finn, he sat back to let her do the talking now. The Force was her field. She took a deep breath.

“Now, wait a minute. As I said before, Reif, being a Jedi is not an easy path. It’s not for everyone. I don’t even know how you all came to know that you’re force sensitive. Do you have families? I know Reif doesn’t have a family, as such.”

“None of us have families,” Temiri said. Rey felt a shiver of unease. All of them were orphans, all were vulnerable. They needed guidance but where to start?

“Okay. So I came from Jakku where I survived as a scavenger,” Rey said. “Where do the rest of you come from?”

“We’re stable hands on Canto Bight,” Temiri said, putting a hand on Feanaa’s shoulder.

“I live on Corellia now but my family originally came from Cortico,” Denea said. Rey noticed she didn’t actually say what she did to survive, but she could guess it had something to do with the criminal elements there.

“So how do you know you’re force sensitive and how did you come together on this… _link_?” Rey could feel that it was a kind of connection, like a force-boosted commlink that would probably be undetectable by normal monitoring scans. That you had to be force sensitive to identify it was…disconcerting and intriguing.

“It started with a vision for me,” Temiri said. “That’s how I knew to look for the right thing.”

“We all had a vision of some kind,” Reif said. “Most of us saw someone calling us.”

Rey felt a stab of alarm and looked at Ben. A storm of emotion raged within him for a moment, as those old and painful memories had returned, but then it shut down as though he was shielding her from it all. She saw his fist clench and shake and his tension was palpable when he spoke, his voice sharper than he’d probably intended.

“Who was it that called you?” Ben asked. Reif looked at Ben and his eyes widened. Ben forced a smile and visibly tried to relax, releasing his clenched fist.

Reif responded tentatively, “I don’t know his name. He looked like a man but he wasn’t. He was old and had all scars across his face and head. He said we needed to learn about the force and that we must never tell anyone about it.” Ben’s face blanched several shades lighter than his already pale skin.

“We haven’t heard from him for nearly two years, though,” Denea said. “We’ve just kept up the link and tried to find out about the force.”

Ben relaxed visibly. Rey felt his shields soften and his turmoil quieten as his words whispered in her mind.

_Because I killed him_.


	13. Echoes Of The Past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I know. Let the past die,” she murmured. She turned back to the curious faces of the children watching her. And Finn…who was frowning in disapproval, having spotted Ben surreptitiously holding her hand. Rey slipped her hand from Ben’s, a blush creeping over her face - that was interrupted by a surge of panic as she realised Ben and Finn were looking daggers at each other again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I finally got this chapter in order. It was such a mess to start with and I am so grateful to @ColliderofHadron for helping me sort it out. Love your work. I hope everyone enjoys reading this chapter because there are some important points about Rey's past that I may be speculating about as well as having some fun with Ben and Rey and their...oh just read it before I start rambling.

Rey was stunned for a moment as she realised the implications of what she was hearing.

Snoke had somehow recruited these children through the link, with the intention of _training_ them. For what purpose? As new _servants_ to be brutalised and used. To replace Ben, when Snoke had finished with him. She reached out to the force, listening as is whispered to her, and felt certain of her conclusions.

Rey recalled Snoke’s ravaged face as he gloated, boasting of his power and control over Ben. It was a face she had tried hard to dispel from her thoughts, even after many hours of meditation to release her fears into the force she still found his memory harrowing. She hadn’t been the only one Ben had saved from Snoke’s cruel manipulation and exploitation.

Ben was certain too. They looked at each other and something softened in her heart as she felt a throb of pain from him, as though he had an aching wound that had never truly healed.

They both jumped when a querulous young voice broke into their world.

“What did you mean when you said the First Order will rip itself apart?” Denea asked of Ben. He withdrew for a moment as though collecting his thoughts.

Rey reached out to him and brushed his mind with calm and peace but, when he glanced at her, she saw that his eyes held a deep emotion she wasn’t sure she was brave enough to name. He looked at the group, appearing to choose his words carefully, given that the people he was addressing were children. Very savvy, old-before-their-time pre-teens, but children all the same.

“The First Order has been trying to pull all the systems and regions together, but it’s too much. _Kylo Ren_ wasn’t very good at making everyone work together as they should. The First Order was supposed to fix all the problems left by the Republic,” Ben said. Rey could hear the self-doubt and regret in his voice. Finn watched him closely, his gaze narrowing, but he did not interrupt, curious in spite of himself.

“Kylo Ren lost sight of what others were doing, you see, and now these others are just waiting to pull everything apart.” He stopped for a moment and Rey could feel his thoughts crumbling in disarray. Before he could continue though, Denea interrupted, her mind focused on his previous statement.

“The First Order didn’t try to fix _anything_ ,” she snarled, her eyes ablaze as she glared at Ben. “They just want to take everything for themselves and leave the rest of us to die. They’re worse than the Republic ever was. At least the Republic left us alone.”

Ben huffed and glowered at the room in general. “The Republic sat in endless debate while the crime syndicates rose up and took control of far too much. They had most of the galaxy on its knees and the Republic is to blame. The First Order was supposed to fix that.”

Denea snarled at Ben over the holoscreen, her bitterness a palpable force even through the holo-projection.

“You know nothing!” she spat. “The First Order didn’t fix _anything_. They’re the ones who made this whole mess.” Ben scowled and drew back, but Denea didn’t let him respond before turning to address Rey. “You want to know why my parents are dead? I heard my grandmother talking…”

The girl stopped, breathing hard and fighting back tears. Finn seemed about to say something, but Rey reached out and put a hand on his shoulder. Rey saw in Denea’s eyes the same bitter despair she had seen all too often on Jakku, the same hopelessness and anguish that Rey had tried so hard to protect herself against, the reason she had clung so hard to her assertion that her parents would come back. A shield against so much misery. Denea seemed to have no such shield.

“We used to be farmers on Cortico,” Denea continued, the harshness on her voice wavering as emotion threatened to strangle her words. “We might not have had much, but we were happy. Then the First Order came and kicked us off. The Stormtroopers hurt my father because we didn’t want to go. We had no money to get him help for his injuries and he was always in pain after that.”

She looked at those about her, but no-one was willing to speak. After a wretched moment of reflection she pursued her tale with renewed bitterness. “That’s why he started drinking. As for my mother, the only way she could get money for us…”

Again she stopped and looked down. Rey’s heart ached for her. “Denea…” Rey began but stopped. Rey knew she should reach out to Denea, comfort her but a cold and awful fascination gripped her even as old memories of her own parents threatened to undo her.

Denea looked directly at Rey, her eyes fierce and full of hate and pain.

“My mother had to sleep with men to get money. My grandmother said it was because of the things they did to her that she drank to forget.” Denea’s voice was like the lash of a whip now and each strike of her words was merciless.

“One day they decided I was better off without them and they just drank themselves to death,” she took a gulping breath, her eyes focusing on the aching memory as it played in her mind. “When I found them, there was nothing I could do.”

Denea turned to Ben and her voice was pure venom. “The First Order and those who join them took _everything_ from me. Even my grandmother is dead now. She starved while First Order Officers sat in their fancy starship up above and ate the food they stole from our planet.”

Denea stopped, took a shaky breath and scrubbed at her eyes as the room fell into complete silence. Ben was clearly shaken, but Rey was unable to reach out to either him or Denea, suddenly forcing back the sting of tears as her heart began to race. Something in Denea’s story hit too close to home, dredging up those terrible memories she had tried so hard to let go. In reality she’d only buried them deeper.

Even after Ben had forced her to face the lies she’d been telling herself, she had not really dealt with it. Now she found herself questioning exactly what she remembered - memories of events and emotions viewed through the naïve eyes of a child. Now, as an adult, she had to ask herself - did she really know the whole story?

She felt Ben’s presence brush her mind and the gentle touch of his fingers on her hand again. She closed her eyes and clung to the comfort and reassurance he offered across the bond, the gentle intimacy providing the strength to stop her mind slipping back to that day in the desert, when Plutt had grabbed her arm and yanked her away, when… Rey shook the memory off. Ben had been right, her parents _had_ sold her off to Plutt and drank themselves to death. She should move on. Let the past die.

But now – she couldn’t help asking _why_? Had they been like Denea’s parents, caught in such dismal circumstances that they couldn’t escape? Had they tried, but given up? Why had they left her with Plutt, of all people? Did they think she wasn’t worthy? Had they ever really loved her?

“Rey.” Ben’s voice pulled her out of her spiralling thoughts, soft and full of the warmth she had longed for. But she couldn’t quite escape the thought that she hadn’t been good enough for them.

She turned back to Denea and realised that Finn had filled the void left by her silence, talking gently to the girl throughout Rey’s seemingly inexplicable silence. Denea had now calmed somewhat and was looking at Rey with a question in her eyes. Rey glanced at Finn for guidance, and he just shrugged awkwardly.

“He said your parents died when you were young, too, and that you had to survive on your own.”  Denea repeated. Rey nodded and smiled at the girl, hoping to allay the concern in her eyes.

Rey took a breath and looked at Ben again, her smile still pasted firmly in place but she could feel he wasn’t buying her façade.

“I know. Let the past die,” she murmured. She turned back to the curious faces of the children watching her. And Finn…who was frowning in disapproval, having spotted Ben surreptitiously holding her hand. Rey slipped her hand from Ben’s, a blush creeping over her face – that was interrupted by a surge of panic as she realised Ben and Finn were looking daggers at each other again.

Rey clapped her hands together and smiled with as much enthusiasm as she could at the children. “So, do you want me to teach you about the force?”

Young eyes lit up as smiles spread across their faces, displaying their eagerness.

“Let me teach you one of the first lessons I leaned about the force. One that I leaned from Master Luke Skywalker himself.”

This was met with several enthusiastic gasps, and she was pleased to note that Finn was now grinning at her in approval.

Ben coughed and their eyes shifted to him. Rey glared at him and he regarded her with an enigmatic gaze.

“Perhaps they should tell us what they already know about the force first.”

Rey felt the wind go out of her sails. “Of course.”

She turned to the children, looking at each one of them…and felt out of her depth, her own knowledge gained neither with ease nor without consequence.

“Perhaps if you looked into their minds you might see for yourself,” Ben said.

Rey’s stiffened, her mouth falling open. “What? No, I will not do that.”

Ben’s eyes narrowed, a challenge in his voice. “You learned…that way.”

“And I have learned better ways since then.”

Ben scowled and folded his arms across his chest. “Oh, of course,” he huffed. “All that sitting on a rock and meditating with Luke about how to avoid falling to the dark side.”

Rey sniffed and raised her chin. “Actually, I meditate on the _balance_ of the force. And it was Luke who taught me about that.”

Ben rolled his eyes. “The wafflings of an old man who was afraid of half of the force and what it offered.”

“Oh right, because you would never ignore half of the force yourself,” Rey snapped. Ben’s jaw tensed and his eyes burned with wrath. A sense of injustice boiled across the bond but Rey wasn’t going to let that make her do things she wasn’t comfortable with. They glared at each other, testing each other’s resolve, until their attention was diverted by a cough from Finn.

They looked back to see the faces of the children, their expressions holding a painful combination of confusion and worry. Rey felt her heart rip, what was she doing? She felt Ben shut down but not before a jolt of guilt and confusion pinged at her across the bond like an echo of her own feelings. 

“Perhaps now is not a good time for a lesson on the force,” Rey muttered, her face flaming with embarrassment at the realisation that she had almost started an argument with Ben in front of everyone.

The corresponding moans of disappointment from the children only served to heap more guilt on top of her vexation.

“Wait a minute,” Ben said (was that a note of contrition in his voice?), she raised a brow as she scanned his face, his eyes beseeching while he chewed at the inside of his lip. “We can at least teach them the proper way to meditate on the force as practice for next time.” Rey felt a swell of relief.

“Of course.” Whatever differences she and Ben may have, she could not leave these children begging for knowledge as Luke had done with her, nor would she allow it to be thrust on them before they were ready.

It became obvious that she and Ben had different ideas on how to meditate on the force as well. She wanted the children to meditate on the wholeness of the force and how it connected them to the galaxy, whereas Ben though they should meditate on the parts they identified with the most, letting their feelings guide them. It seemed they were always opposites of each other. They were going to have to work this out somehow.

“Why can’t we do both?” Reif suggested. They looked at the boy, his innocent face full of worry and hope that they might listen to him.

Rey realised her arguments with Ben were not going to help their students, that it was a trap to assume her way was somehow superior to Ben’s. Besides, Ben really had been learning about the force longer than she had. She smiled and nodded.

“Why don’t we just meditate without putting our expectations on them,” she said. Ben nodded as he considered this. If they stuck to the areas they agreed on for now then they might actually do some good.

Together they taught the children how to calm their breathing and their minds, and just let the force in. It seemed as though the link enhanced the connections between them all, and both Rey and Ben realised that Reif and Denea were more in tune with the balance of the force than Temiri and Feanaa. On the other hand, the two from Canto Bight seemed to balance each other in ways that Reif and Denea did not. When Rey felt the children tiring, she ended the lesson and told them to meditate on the force every day and to allow it to guide them.

Temiri and Feanaa had to leave the link as soon as the lesson was over and said their goodbyes. Denea lingered on though.

“Rey,” she said, her voice uncertain. Rey turned back to the holo-image of the girl.

“I’m sorry about before, when I said all that stuff. I wasn’t trying to be mean. I just….”

Rey’s heart went out to her.

“It’s alright Denea. I know you just wanted someone to listen,” she said.

“Yeah, I guess. I’ve just been so angry about it all, and how there must have been something more I could have done.”

“Oh Denea, you can’t change the choices your parents made,” she said, her heart aching for the girl, knowing the feelings she battled. Rey stopped there, realising she wasn’t one to talk - she had _always_ thought there was something more she should have done, something that would have stopped them leaving her behind.

Denea jumped and looked away for a moment as though startled by something. When she turned back the softness in her eyes had hardened and she was again the self-sufficient survivor. “I have to go. Please say we’ll talk again,” she said.

“Of course,” Rey said. She would make it a priority. Denea’s image faded and it was just the four of them again.

“That was really fun,” Reif said and grinned up at Ben. Ben’s face held an answering smile.

“Perhaps you should thank Rey for showing you how to meditate on the force,” he said.

Reif looked a little chagrined and turned to her.

“Thank you, Rey,” he said and Rey reached out and ruffled his hair and smiled.

“Perhaps we can do the same again tomorrow,” she said, a promise Reif instantly looked forward to. For now though, Rey needed space to think. Besides, Finn had a worried frown on his face as he watched her and Ben that Rey couldn’t face. Mainly because she didn’t know what was really happening between her and Ben either.

Reif had turned back to Finn, a curious look on his face. “Can you tell me about the Resistance?” he asked, and Rey caught Ben’s scowl. She could have laughed at how these two men were subtly vying for the boy’s attention. She stepped back, feeling a pressing desire to get outside into the fresh air, so she slipped away, leaving Finn talking to Reif while Ben continued to glower at the Resistance hero.

Once out in the open, she could breathe again. The fresh air was a relief, especially as it was moist and full of scents. She looked about at the ion cannon-blasted landscape, the crater, the singed and smoking surrounds of the forest but she took little more notice than that. She broke into a run, needing to exert herself. Physical exertion had always given her an outlet to all that had seemed harsh and unfair in her life.

“Rey! Stop.”

Ben had followed her, but she wanted to be alone and think. Feeling him reaching out to her through the bond, she shored up her mental shields and turned to head away into the forest, skirting around the base of the hill and finding a narrow pathway into the shadowy green world of the jungle. She concentrated on picking her way through the trees and branches, skipping rocks and hollows, letting the force guide her as she fled, as though every nightmare she’d ever had was snapping at her heels.

Except one nightmare, or dark and dangerous dream at least, _was_ on her heels. The sounds of crashing vegetation and creative swearing behind her was a loudhailer announcement that Ben was indeed still chasing her. She slowed her pace, curiously willing to let him catch her this time. She wasn’t going to make it easy for him, though. She leapt a narrow ravine, skirted about the hill along narrow criss-crossing animal paths and scaled a low cliff with ease, pushing her body to defy gravity as she dragged herself up over the top.

Before she made it, a powerful hand snapped about her ankle, halting her progress while her other foot slipped under the sudden imbalance and she toppled back, a shriek renting the air. She could have fought back, pushed him away. Instead she let her body rest in the force push he used to spin her around so she landed comfortably in his arms. On instinct she wrapped her arms around his neck, automatically clinging to him.

He glared at her as they both caught their breath. Finally, he spoke. “You promised to stay with me.”

Rey huffed. “I needed to clear my head. I never said I wouldn’t come back.”

“No, you didn’t say anything, did you?” Ben grumbled. Rey leant her head against his chest as he turned and began to walk back the way they’d come.

“You do realise it’s going to take a lot longer to get back than it took to get here,” Ben muttered. Rey snuggled closer.

“You could put me down and then we could travel faster.”

A scowl wrinkled his forehead, his grumpy reply tinged with a hint of anxiety. “And have you run off again? Not likely,” he groused, even as his arms tightened and held her closer. Rey found herself listening to the way his voice seemed to reverberate inside his chest as he spoke and, deeper yet, the muffled power of his heartbeat. She was drawn to the sound of his breathing. He was either very strong or he was drawing on the force for strength, as each breath now seemed regular and effortless in spite of her weight in his arms.

As predicted, the walk back was longer than they both remembered. Rey finally convinced Ben to put her down when they got back to the ravine they’d jumped before. When he let her feet touch the ground again he held her close and looked into her eyes.

“Promise you won’t run off,” he said.

“And what if I did?” she said, half teasing, half serious. Ben’s eyes grew dark and liquid, there was no anger just an unbearable vulnerability. He loosened his arms as though giving her the freedom to run if she wanted to.

“Please don’t,” he murmured.

Rey swallowed and couldn’t look at the pain that lurked behind the earnest look in his eyes. Instead, she wound her arms about his waist and laid her cheek on his wide chest.

“I made a promise to you, Ben Solo. I won’t go back on that. I know what it is to be left behind.”

Ben suddenly let her go and pushed away from her. She released her arms as her eyes snapped up to see the storm in his eyes.

“You left _me_ behind on the Supremacy.”

The accusation felt like a knife through her heart, making her shudder. She saw again how his hope had turned to hurt and anger two years ago, when she’d tried to take the saber and run, and she had felt his desperation as he had tried to hold on to it and her. Her own hurt rose up, though, when she realised _she_ hadn’t been enough. He’d wanted the power of the First Order and she’d known it would always come between them. Just as money and alcohol had come between her and her parents. She had thought Ben would let it all go for her, just as he had in the vision. Except it hadn’t been Ben reaching out to her.

“I came for Ben Solo, but Kylo Ren wouldn’t let him go.”

Ben bowed his head. His shoulders shook for a moment as he breathed in and out. She wanted to hold him again but sensed there was something more he needed to say.

“And what happens now that Kylo Ren is dead?

Rey stared at him, could it be true?

“I’m still here for Ben Solo,” she said. He chewed his lip for a moment before he looked up at her, just staring into her eyes until she thought she might fall into that gaze for all eternity. His lips parted and he took a breath and wordlessly reached out his hand. Her heart melted and she placed her hand in his. A simple gesture but it meant so much more.

He stepped closer and held her hand against his chest. Something dark and hot sparked in his eyes and she jolted a little, his intensity had always sent her into a spin. She couldn’t help looking at his mouth, with the memory of that kiss filling her mind again. A little smile pulled at the corner of his mouth because, damnit, he knew what she was thinking about.

“Kiss me again,” he breathed. There was a strange fog in her brain as she swayed towards him. Rey tried to calm her mental state and fight the escalating feelings inside her.

She held her breath. What if it all went wrong again? The fog cleared as her fears glared through her desires. She backed away but he kept hold of her hand.

“Rey.” The heat in his eyes held a chill of fear at her hesitation.

“I…Ben.” The truth was that she wanted him and he wanted her but…her fears rose up inside her, a dark beast that clawed at her mind. What if in the end he didn’t turn back to the light. She’d made assumptions and messed up last time. She still had so many questions about how things had turned out and why the vision didn’t go as she had thought. She’d been so certain and yet…

He let her hand go, letting his own hands fall to his sides but he did not step away from her. When he spoke his voice was low, defeated.

“Run if you have to. I won’t hold you to your promise.”

She blinked. “What?”

He swallowed and looked down. “You mean more to me than anything, Rey. But I would rather let you go than hurt you like I did when... I won’t make you stay.”

She didn’t know what to say. Last time, on Snoke’s ship, he’d wanted it all but now he seemed ready to give up everything. She did the only thing she could think of, she held out her hand to him.

He looked at her and it was as though his heart began to beat again as relief flooded through him and across the bond. He reached out and took her hand and she pulled him to her and he came willingly, folding her into his embrace. His strong arms about her was all she needed, that and…

She tipped her face up to look at him again and bathed in the gentle delight that lit up his eyes like they were dark jewels. Her heart fluttered as his tender gaze ignited, looking down at her through eyes half veiled by the tangled sweep of black silk locks. Her own gaze roamed across the soft pale skin of his cheek, scattered with all of those fascinating moles and freckles that she had so quickly become familiar with before returning to the generous curve of his mouth, its rosy hue beckoning her.  

He was so close she could feel the warmth of his breath tickling across her cheek, ear and neck, causing her hair to stand on end. She drank in the way his lips parted and quivered in anticipation. He was looking at her mouth too and her heart started up some crazy rhythm as his arms about her tightened a little more, heralding the return of that fog that crept back into her mind to cloud all reason.

_Kiss me Rey._

A soft gasp escaped her lips as the words whispered in her mind, sending her pulse skyrocketing. She slid her hands up over the broad expanse of his chest toward his collar, reveling in the feel of softness over the hard muscle beneath. She slipped her hands behind his neck and laced her fingers up into the lush silk of his hair to pull him down to her mouth. An ache of longing throbbed across the bond and found a home in her own wanting. His arms tightened about her and he nearly lifted her off the ground as he crushed her against him, their mouths so close, as her eyes drifted closed.

A cough sounded behind them.

They almost ignored it as Ben’s lips feathered across her lower lip, stars bursting across her vision. 

A second cough.

A temporary pause turned into an aeon of craving as their lips, barely touching, trembled one against the other.

A huff and the sound of exasperation. Rey opened her eyes to find Ben’s eyes were burning but not with the tender yearning Rey had been soaking up a moment ago. Rey almost sobbed when he pulled back just a little, the gap between them a veritable canyon. Ben clenched his jaw and he turned his head just a little to the side, his glare murderous.

“What do you want, old man?”

“Ah, you finally noticed I was here,” Luke’s ghost said.


	14. Two Steps Forward and Two Steps Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her son looked down for a brief moment and when he looked up again his eyes were full of pain.  
> “I found the message you sent. Snoke kept it from me for years.” Upon hearing the name of that despicable...thing...Leia’s heart roiled with raw hatred for just a moment, but her son was speaking again.   
> “I’m sorry for….” He stopped, his mouth working as he swallowed down his deep sadness, and she knew what he was sorry for.

Finn started to panic when he realised both Rey and Kylo Ren were missing.

Kylo Ren was going to seduce Rey to the dark side…and more. And Finn had to stop that happening. He had to get Rey, and Reif, for that matter, off this planet and away from Be…Kylo Ren. That man was a predatory snake hunting his prey, and Rey was it. He had to do something – fast.

Finn looked about. Reif was still fiddling with the comm after their holovid call. _The Comm_. Of course.

Finn tried to sound casual. “Hey Reif.” The boy looked up at him, an eager look in his eyes.

“Can I use your comm to contact the Resistance?” he said. Reif’s eyes lit up, but quickly clouded with uncertainty.

“We can try. The link is powered through the temple, but the comm really only works to get the signal from the temple to here and project the holo-images.”

Finn’s stomach dropped. He was okay at basic electronics, enough to get himself out of a fix or to understand the general workings of objects such as spacecraft and other machinery. Anything more advanced than that was the territory of tech heads like Rose and Rey.

He looked at the comm, it had to be worth a try. He had to get word to the Resistance that Kylo Ren was _here_ …not dead. And they should come and get them _all_.

Of course Chewie wouldn’t leave them there, but who knew when he would be back. With what he’d just heard about Hux and the First Order, he could only imagine what the Resistance was facing right now. Although, he mused, it _was_ interesting to think of Be…Ren’s predictions about the First Order tearing itself apart.

Actually the most compelling reason to contact the Resistance was to pass on everything he’d learned about what was happening inside the Order. As much as he hated to admit it, Ben was right. The Hux that Finn remembered had always been uncertain of his position of power and would be paranoid enough to go too far in shoring up his leadership. He needed to speak to Poe and The General and get some discussion started about the implications of possible factional fighting within the First order.

If he was honest though, the person he wanted to speak to most was Rose. He was really starting to miss her. Apart from letting each other know they were okay and making sure everything was alright with the baby, he needed her advice about this _thing_ going on with Rey and Ben.

He clenched his fists. _Kylo Ren,_ for kriff’s sake!

Reif had opened up the comm to look at the works and Finn stared doubtfully at the twisted mass of circuitry inside. The first thing he noticed was that, instead of a receiver, there was a softly glowing purple crystal. Okay – this was obviously what Reif meant by a ‘modified’ comm and something to do with the force. His heart sank. This was definitely out of his field.

“Right,” Reif said. “I can try putting in the old receiver. That’s what used to be in there before we put the crystal from the temple in it.”

Reif rummaged around under the bench where the comm sat, almost disappearing underneath it, his voice muffled as he spoke to Finn. “I tried fixing it but I just haven’t gotten around to testing it.”

The boy pulled his head out from under the bench, reaching one last time for something before he brought it out. A small device that looked not much bigger than a protein cube.

“Do you have a frequency we could try?” Reif said. “If we could locate the Resistance signal, I could calibrate the comm to receive other signals.” The boy’s voice grew a little softer and more plaintive. “Lomas doesn’t have many strong signals so I gave up looking for others after a while,” he sighed. Finn could see the boy’s loneliness and was more determined than ever not to leave him behind.

Finn tossed up the various merits and disadvantages of giving the kid the right frequency for the Resistance. It had been deliberately obscured to make it hard to find. Their safety relied on it and as much as he wanted Reif to trust him Finn couldn’t go against Resistance protocol. If people didn’t need to know then they shouldn’t.

“Or I could just let you find it?” Reif suggested, when it was obvious Finn had hesitated.

“Sorry,” Finn apologised, putting a reassuring hand on Reif’s shoulder. “Resistance protocols are very strict about keeping communications secret.”

Reif nodded, accepting this without question. They sat in comfortable silence. Finn watched the kid as he worked, marvelling at the boy’s nimble fingers as they plucked and retwisted wires and snapped various components in place. Reif handed the crystal to Finn, who regarded it with curiosity as he turned it in his hand. It was warm to touch and felt as though it was a living thing that now rested in his hand.

Once the receiver was plugged back in, Reif allowed Finn to adjust it to a Resistance signal and powered up the comm by flicking the switch.

Nothing.

Reif huffed. “Just as I thought,” he grumbled. “I need a new receiver to get normal signals.”

Finn’s heart sank.

“We could use Ben’s ship?” Reif suggested.

“No,” Finn said too quickly. Reif looked up at him, eyes questioning.

“His comm isn’t secured. It would be dangerous,” Finn explained. Which was true. It just wasn’t the exact reason Finn didn’t want to go anywhere near Ben’s ship. _Kylo Ren’s_ ship. He ground his teeth. He didn’t care what Rey wanted to call him, he was Kylo Ren and the sight of that ship gave him the shivers.

“This comm isn’t secured either,” Reif said. Finn now felt like he was standing in a search light at midnight.

“Ah, yes, well. No-one’s looking for _your_ signal. I’m pretty sure no-one’s been here to put a bug in it either.”

Reif’s eyes widened for a moment as he stared at Finn but then he nodded, again accepting what he said. Finn was not aware how taught his nerves were until he felt the tension drain from him. This kid was smart but didn’t say a lot. It was unnerving and endearing all at once.

“Right, well. Where do you think we could find a new receiver?” he asked. They looked at each other for a moment, nonplussed. Reif brightened as an idea came to him.

“We could try and contact Rada again! I remember he said there was a mole in the First Order. Maybe we could get a message through that way?”

Finn was alarmed for a moment, until he remembered there had often been stories about moles during his time in the Order and it was likely that such rumours were still commonplace. Finn knew how closely guarded a secret the Resistance mole was and he didn’t want to jeopardise this by using their contact in an unsanctioned way. Rumours were one thing. They didn’t need to hand them proof.

“No, if there was a mole we might accidentally expose our contact,” he said. “That would definitely _not_ be good.” Reif nodded again and slumped, chewing his lip as he thought for a while.

“I could try and build a new receiver. I’ve picked up a lot of stuff over the years, I might be able to build a new one.” The boy brightened considerably as he spoke. “I’ll get Sidebolt to help again!”

Finn nodded. The weird droid had an alarming habit of unexpectedly popping out of various locations in the ship and it never failed to unnerve him, but he had to admit that Sidebolt had proved very helpful so far.

 

 

Hux was congratulating himself on his pre-emptive strike.

Kylo Ren was gone, as were the usurper’s supporters. Annoyingly Admiral Savic had managed to keep his head and now claimed to be satisfied that Hux’s ascension was legal. Savic wasn’t as easily replaceable as many others were, given that he had familial links to wealthy and well-connected interests. Hux wasn’t about to bite the hand that fed, literally. Savic’s family empire supplied much of the First Order’s food supplies.

Lieutenant Geddi approached, snapping to attention and announcing in a well-schooled voice that didn’t quite hide the fact that he was nervous.

“Supreme Leader, we’ve had word from General Gorondo.” Hux didn’t miss the edge in the young man’s voice or the tension in his stance and was satisfied by the young officer’s visceral response as he continued.

“The Khalak system has revealed a planetary weapons array capable of blowing up a star destroyer. She urges that you send the Supremacy immediately and quell the uprising.”

Hux smiled, a delicious thought occurring to him. “We will be there shortly, Lieutenant Geddi, but first we must transfer to the Ascendancy. I know her maiden voyage would have been tomorrow, but what better way to launch our newest and largest asset than to use it for what it was meant for?”

Geddi’s mouth opened and closed, but he nodded and obediently stepped back with a “Yes, Supreme Leader,” that gave Hux a great deal of satisfaction.

The transfer to the Ascendancy was smooth and triumphant. Hux strode with purpose through the main hangar of the monolithic structure, flanked by Phasma, Savic and all of his trusted officers. A legion of stormtroopers followed, completing his entourage, while another legion provided a double-rowed honour guard as he strode out ahead, sure of his place in all of this.

The ride in the turbolift to the bridge was smooth and quiet. He turned briefly to the young Lieutenant standing behind him.

“Tell me about this planetary defence system on Khalak,” he demanded. Geddi pulled out a data screen and brought up his notes.

“They’ve managed to develop a Kyber-based cannon that’s apparently able to rupture the hull of a Star Destroyer.”

Hux Grinned. “Well, well! We shall see how it all goes against a shoot-out with the Ascendancy, shall we?”

Savic smiled and nodded, while Geddi murmured, “Yes, Supreme Leader.”

Hux liked Geddi. The man always adopted just the right manner of addressing him. Perhaps he would promote him to Captain but then, he mused, he would have to give him a post. He sighed, a delicate sound for his own ears. Such a shame, but a good lieutenant was hard to find - perhaps the man would need to be a lieutenant for a little longer yet. Hux stood with his feet apart and hands behind his back, intent on making a confident entry to the bridge.

Raised voices assaulted his ears as soon as the turbolift opened. Those voices quietened the moment Hux stepped out and surveyed the situation.

“What is going on?” he demanded. He expected professional behaviour from his officers, not bickering like old women.

Captain Elshop turned to him, her face tense. She saluted in accordance with proper protocol and addressed him immediately as Supreme Leader. He was therefore prepared to forgive her next words.

“There are several protocols that need the Supreme Leader’s command, that’s all.” She explained with efficient haste. “Now that you’re here, Supreme Leader, your personal code will allow us to be on our way.”

Hux looked about him and smiled as he surveyed the uncertainty of the bridge crew. He could afford to be magnanimous just this once.

“Well of course, Captain. There has been a change of command.” Hux stepped forward to the main console and entered his personal code plus the new code for Supreme Leader Armitage Hux.

The whole bridge seemed to hold its breath. Hux looked askance at the bridge crew, uncertain as to the cause of the palpable anxiety, but he would get to the bottom of…

“ _ACCESS DENIED_.”

 

 

Ensign Geddi would always feel that it was a marvel he survived that day. In the years to come he would often wonder how he’d lived through any of it. He’d been excited to be elevated to Hux’s entourage at first but quickly realised it was not a promotion that would be envied by his colleagues.

When that smooth masculine voice had denied Hux access to the critical controls of the Ascendancy it had had much the same effect as a blade saw firing up in a cantina full of smugglers.

Chaos returned as tech officers dove for their consoles, cursing under their breaths. Fingers sped desperately across keypads, or scrabbled to pull wires and control boards back out for further frantic examination. Various command officers spat terse expletives and barked orders at shaken underlings, while others stood back and looked for someone else to blame. Still others made surreptitious moves towards the exits while various droids were heard to bemoan the rigours of memory erasure.

Hux’s face turned red with rage but his wrath became an icy threat as he pinned a pale-faced Captain Elshop to the spot with a glare that let her see every kilowatt of his fury. Apparently this was not the first time his commands had been sabotaged by electronic stubbornness today, and the new Supreme Leader was _not_ having it.

“What is the meaning of this?” Hux snarled. The panic in the room escalated as Phasma signalled for her execution troopers to step forward. Geddi began to feel queasy at what he knew was coming next.

“Someone had better inform me _why_ the First Order’s greatest star ship is _not_ launching into hyperspace as I speak, Captain, or heads will roll.”

Captain Elshop swallowed and straightened her shoulders, her pale face now sweaty and tinged with green.

“Supreme Leader, it appears that the system will not accept any other code but the one for Supre…Kylo Ren…Sir.”

Hux’s jaw flexed as he stared, incredulous, at the captain. His fury turned deadly, his next command sending the room into meltdown.

“Execute Captain Elshop immediately. After that, execute one of her subordinates _every ten minutes_ until I have full command of the ship!”

Elshop turned a pasty grey as those around her paled and surreptitiously moved away, looking for a way out as Phasma and the execution troopers approached. Geddi felt his blood turn to ice. This was outrageous, even for Hux.

Admiral Savic coughed and stepped forward. “Such a waste of talent, Supreme Leader,” he ventured. The confident smile on his face belied the tentative stance of his body, uncertain of whether or not he would also find himself facing the executioners next to Elshop. “I think you might find what you’re looking for in Kylo Ren’s…err…your new quarters. I’m sure Ren’s droid will have the key to this minor hiccup.”

A spark of hope flared in Elshop’s eyes and, for his own sake, Geddi hoped it would not have any cause to go out.

Hux looked at Savic, his lip curling, but he appeared to pull back his wrath for a moment, eventually waving Phasma down after what felt like an eon.

“If I do not have command of this ship in _ten minutes,_ no talent will stop me from executing everyone in this room until I do.”

“Yes, Supreme Leader,” Savic said, his tentative stance of before now becoming more obsequious, even slightly mocking, as though he was shovelling cream into the jaws of a loth cat.

Ten minutes later, a livid Hux stood in front of the doors of what should have been his new quarters.

“What do you mean you can’t find C3N1? I want that droid and I want the access code or I will tear this ship apart until I get it!”

Geddi had noticed that the bridge crew was getting fewer and fewer. There was a full complement of stormtroopers, held together by Phasma’s overbearing presence, but in regards to officers and tech crew, it was starting to look like the graveyard shift.

“Geddi!” He jumped at the sound of his name being shouted.

“Yes, Supreme Leader,” he blurted out, clicking his heels together as he stood with his hands behind his back, his chin up. Hux was glaring at him and Geddi knew he was about to be executed. Well, at least he would go down appearing cool and in control, and not like a blubbering idiot.

“I asked you what you thought.”

Geddi decided that if this was the last moments of his life then he may as well state the obvious.

“I believe the Supremacy would be just as good at dealing with the Khalak System Supreme Leader. The techs can sort this mess out and the rest of us can get on with what needs to be done.”

A deathly silence reigned as Hux stared at him. Geddi wondered if anyone noticed that his legs had somehow turned to jelly. All he could do was stare straight ahead and pretend he wasn’t about to feel the executioner’s electric blade at his neck.

Hux snorted and grinned. “There you go!” he said, waving his hand at the terrified Lieutenant as he looked around at the other officers. “Someone with some common sense.”

Geddi wasn’t sure he heard that correctly. His racing heart nearly stopped as he realised he _wasn’t_ about to die, at least not this time, and it was all he could do not to collapse in a heap on the floor.

Hux grimaced at Captain Elshop, his expression reminding Geddi of someone who’d just eaten something unpleasant.

“You have until I return, Captain Elshop,” Hux snapped. The disagreeable expression persisted on Hux’s face as he turned on his heel and headed towards the turbolift. Of all the eyes that followed the new Supreme Leader as he left, Captain Elshop’s held the most bitterness. Where once there had been determination to serve to the best of her ability, there was now only fading loyalty.

Just before Geddi moved to follow Hux, he caught the look between Savic and Elshop and he realised he’d been wrong. It wasn’t just fading loyalty in her eyes - it was a changing of allegiance.

Savic patted him on the shoulder and winked at him. Geddi nodded back, deciding silence was a good way to finish this interchange and wondered if he too might be changing his allegiance.

 

 

Leia sat in her room, her head bowed and shoulders slumped as she stared at the gold dice in her hands. How could she go on alone? Ben and her stoic hope that he would come home had been the only thing keeping her going.

“Luke,” she whispered as a tear splashed on her wrist. “Let me come to you.” She wiped away the tear and closed her hand around the precious little cubes in her hand, this one memento.

Duty no longer sustained her. In fact it had taken much from her. Too much. For once, she wished she’d been a little more selfish and done a little more of what she wanted. She wished she’d spent more time with Han and Ben.

Ben. She wished she could see him again.

Even just feel his presence in the force one more time.

A knock at the door pulled her attention away from her anguish. Leia slipped the dice into the pocket of her robe. She quickly wiped the wetness from her cheeks and squared her shoulders as she faced the door.

“Come.”

Lieutenant Connix put her head around the door, a look of bemusement on her face.

“General, there’s someone here to see you.”

Someone unexpected, by the look on the young woman’s face.

“I’ll be there in a minute,” she said. She needed a moment or two to collect herself but before that could happen the door swung wide open as a diminutive figure pushed the shocked Lieutenant out of the way.

“I think it would be better if we stayed in here my dear,” Maz Kanata said, her voice raspy with age but no less vigorous in her assertions as she shooed Connix away. Leia watched Han’s old friend with bemusement, but assured Connix they would be fine as she closed the door. Leia slumped back into her chair, her gathering tears clouding her vision and distorting Maz’s aged figure as she approached.

“Maz,” she said, her voice cracking with despair. “He’s gone.”

“No, he’s not?”

Leia stared at her, uncertain of what the old woman meant. The moment she received the news she had reached out to find Ben and had felt nothing. She’d withdrawn quickly, unable to connect to a galaxy without him in it. Even if he was still full of rage and misery, that would have been okay – it would mean he was still there and she still had hope. But his terrifying absence in the force, the severance of her sense of him, had sent her spiralling into a despair of such magnitude she had not been able to continue seeking for him.

Opening her eyes after another tearful blink, Leia found Maz at her side, and her friend took her hand, looking at her through the huge glasses that had first endeared the old smuggler to Leia.

“I know,” the wizened woman spoke softly. “I couldn’t feel him there for a little while either, and I thought it was true too. Funny thing is, I think he’s back. I have no idea how, but he’s still here. If you look for him…”

“Maz…What?” Leia croaked, her mind reeling. She dashed the tears away and sat back in her seat.

“Try,” was all Maz said. Leia took a breath, not sure she could face reaching out into that abyss again. Then there it was. That familiar presence in the force that had been with her for so long. She closed her eyes and reached out…and nearly lost it all.

There was no rage, no pain or churning emotions. Actually, he seemed…happy.

She clapped a hand over her mouth as she stared back at Maz.

“Yes. I was surprised, too. I can only surmise that if Kylo Ren is dead, somehow Ben Solo isn’t.”

Maz pulled something from her pocket. “This came via one of my networks and I wanted to bring it to you personally,” she said. Leia looked at the object in Maz’s outstretched hand and felt a wrenching tug at her heart, the force telling her who it was from. She slowly took the little cylinder from Maz, its tiny weight heavier than its size would imply. She turned to the little holo-projector on her desk and clipped the cylinder in place, pulling her chair closer. She nearly fell out of it again as Ben’s face emerged in front of her.

“Oh. He seems so old,” she whispered and felt the familiar aching regret of all the years that had slipped by as her son grew up.

“Mother.” Leia felt the galaxy spin away from her senses as she focused on this precious image before her. She took in how his voice had deepened, grown harder, sadder. His eyes seemed to be old and weary and dark.

“If you get this message then I am most likely dead.” Leia gripped the desk and shook her head. What was going on in that world of his? Her heart shattered again to know she couldn’t be there to protect him.

“In this cylinder is the key to a weapon that no-one should have. It is aboard the Ascendancy, the newest First Order Mega Destroyer. I want the Resistance to destroy it.”

Leia felt her heart stop. What was he saying?

Her son looked down for a brief moment and when he looked up again his eyes were full of pain.

“I found the message you sent. Snoke kept it from me for years.” Upon hearing the name of that despicable... _thing_...Leia’s heart roiled with raw hatred for just a moment, but her son was speaking again.

“I’m sorry for….” He stopped, his mouth working as he swallowed down his deep sadness, and she knew what he was sorry for. Before he could continue, his eyes glanced sideways for a moment, as though distracted by something, then returned to her bearing a new softness in them. 

“If Rey is there, tell her…tell her I know why she left and that I hope she’s going to be okay.”

The hologram ended and she sat in shocked silence with Maz standing rigidly by her side, both frozen as they stared at the place where the hologram had been. So many things played over in her mind. She burned with anger knowing that Snoke had deliberately held back her message to Ben. She ached seeing the deep sorrow that shadowed his eyes, desperately wishing she could do something to banish his sorrow. But that softness in his eyes when he spoke of Rey... Luke’s young student. The girl who had captured all their hearts had clearly captured his, too. She was her only hope for Ben now. Leia reached for Maz’s hand and her friend’s reassuring clasp was given unreservedly.

“Thank you so much for coming. I’m glad you’re here,” Leia said, her voice wobbling with emotion.

“Me too,” Maz said thoughtfully.

“Do you think…?” Leia began, but to speak her hopes into existence was too frightening. Maz squeezed her hand again.

“I think you have a right to hope, my girl,” Maz said. Leia felt the tears begin to slide down her cheeks once more. Her throat constricted as she spoke, leaving her voice barely audible above a whisper.

“Then I will,” she said and felt as though life had crept back into her ravaged heart. Leia relaxed into the knowledge that her son was still with her. Her real son, the one she’d raised, or at least had tried to raise while everything else seemed to get in the way. She quietly reached out to him, glad that the galaxy was no longer such a lonely place.

She felt a tumult of emotions from him for a moment and respectfully withdrew, not one to pry.

 “You know, I think he’s with Rey,” she said. Maz smiled and nodded. “Yes.” Leia smiled in spite of herself. Maybe Rey had reached him. Maybe…

…except Rey was supposed to be on a shopping trip with Finn and Chewie. She looked at Maz. The old smuggler shrugged her shoulders and held her hands out palms up. Leia pulled the cylinder from the holo-projector, rose unsteadily to her feet and headed for the door, with Maz following her out into the main Resistance base.

“Poe, has Chewie returned with Finn and Rey yet?”

The man looked up from a star chart brightly trailing across the strategy board.

“Ah, no...”

A tech officer turned and addressed her urgently.

“Ma’am, the Millennium Falcon has just emerged from hyperspace…Chewbacca is sending a priority message.”

The sound of howling came over the comm and, as she listened, Leia felt her heart sink. The First Order had turned up at Lomas and Chewie had been forced to leave Rey and Finn behind. He had made several hyperspace jumps then waited for a while, to ensure he hadn’t been followed, before returning back to base. As soon as he’d unloaded the purchased supplies, he intended to go straight back.

“Wait. Chewie. There’s been some developments. We need to think things through a bit.” His response was little more than a growl.

“I know but I…I want you to get Rose’s new cloaking technology properly set up on the Falcon before you go anywhere.”

Another growl.

“Yes, I know but this is _important_.”

Leia had a feeling. She needed to leave Rey and Ben alone for a while longer yet. There was something else…she didn’t know what, but the force was insistent. Her focus had to remain here.

Chewie huffed but complied. Leia looked at Maz. They both looked at the cylinder in her hand.

“I think we need to look into this weapon Ben spoke about before we do anything else,” Maz said. Leia nodded. She desperately wanted to go and find her son, and Rey, and Finn... but matters were accelerating with alarming speed and she needed to make sure they were ready for whatever happened next.

 

 

Larkus Ren stood with the other two remaining Knights of Ren, his command of the dark side allowing him to stand with ease before the image of the true Supreme Leader. The holo-image didn’t look like the Snoke he remembered. This Snoke appeared younger, with undamaged features, or at least that was what the image projected to him and his companions implied.

Snoke spoke with deliberate calm.

“You know that Kylo Ren betrayed me. You must also know he is now dead.”

Larkus didn’t move or say anything. It was not his place.

“I have waited here, in this new vessel, the image of which you see before you, until I can emerge again and take back what is mine.”

Larkus held back a smile. Kylo Ren had taken what he thought was his, too, but how short-lived _that_ had been!

“I need a new apprentice. Someone I can trust. Someone who will not be distracted by personal issues.”

Larkus reached out to the darkness. He needed to be careful here, to listen to the force. He sensed there was a victory to be won here.

Snoke was silent for a moment as he considered each of the three knights before him. Besides Larkus, there was also Murdic and Riona Ren.

“Only one of you can become my apprentice, no more, no less. Only one of you can decide who that will be.”

Larkus knew what Snoke intended and wasn’t going to wait to be given a writ to proceed. His lightsaber flew from his belt and sank into his palm as he whirled on his nearest comrade. Murdic was dead before he even had his weapon ignited. As Snoke’s laugh echoed about the chamber, Larkus whirled again to take down his last obstacle, and clashed with the maroon red saber and golden eyes of Riona Ren.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. Thank you to @colliderofhadron for all of your help in editing this chapter. It's so wonderful to have that kind of support. You do a wonderful job as a beta (even though you are so busy). Thanks again.


	15. Connections

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You’ve seen the original Prime Jedi symbol? You went to Ahch-To?” Rey demanded. Ben’s cheeks pinked a little.  
> “Well, no but, I may have seen a glimpse of it in your mind.”  
> Rey stopped and looked at him.  
> “You’ve been looking in my mind again without me knowing.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter has taken so long, I struggled with this one just to make sure the force stuff didn't end up sounding dumb (at least I hope it doesn't). Thank you to @colliderofhadron for your beta work with this, you helped a great deal in sorting out some of this mess. Please have a look at her work "Sons of the First Order" as well. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

Rey was reeling from the unrequited effects of that _almost_ kiss but Ben couldn’t have been more livid. She could feel his emotions like a tornado ready to cut a swathe across the landscape. Even now she could feel that he wanted to just ignore his uncle, grab Rey and kiss her senseless just because! It was a prospect that turned Rey’s legs to jelly even as her face flamed with the embarrassment of being busted by Ben’s uncle…again.

“You couldn’t have held off for a few minutes?” Ben roared at the apparition behind them. As much as Rey agreed with the sentiment, she was startled by Ben’s lightspeed switch from gentle lover to hostile combatant the moment his uncle’s ghost turned up. Yes, she knew their past wasn’t exactly wildflowers and waterfalls, but surely if a Jedi’s ghost returned then you should respect that they were here for a reason…or at least be nice to them.

Luke’s eye roll and accompanying groan took her back to Ahch-To and his antics on that wind and water-swept island. Becoming a force ghost obviously hadn’t improved his mood, as Luke was now regarding his nephew with a look of long suffering irony. A little headache pinged somewhere near her temple.

“No! You two would just get carried away, and there I’d be - twiddling my thumbs while the critical timing of the galaxy moved on.”

Luke ignored Ben’s incredulous stare (and Rey’s intensifying blush), turned towards the mountain and walked away. No, Luke Skywalker hadn’t changed just because he’d become a force ghost.

“Now, follow me and pay attention.”

Rey didn’t think Ben could have been any angrier. “I’m not going anywhere with you!” he thundered. Rey tried to reach out to him across the bond but only found old wounds that smarted and riled him.

“Ben. It’s okay. Surely Luke wouldn’t be here if he didn’t want to help us.” Ben looked at her, his eyes softening but his wrath still burning. His stare narrowed and focused on her mouth, making Rey quiver.

“Ben, I really think…” Her words ended in a shriek as she was pulled forward, Ben’s arm trapping her against his chest while he plunged his other hand into her hair at the back of her head, tilting her face up to his. His mouth came down on hers, possessive and hungry.

Rey’s thoughts scattered, her mind blanking as her body became a rag doll in his arms. Ben was kissing her like the galaxy was going to end on a moment’s notice. It was all she could do to hang on while he plundered her mouth like a pirate.

Just as fast he pulled away and let go, his chest heaving and his eyes wild with passion and remorse. She tumbled forward as if his body had some kind of gravitational pull on hers. He caught her, his huge hands wrapping about her shoulders as he gently pushed her upright, holding her in place until their breathing returned to normal, her lips throbbing from his dizzying assault on her mouth and senses.

He looked down, a blush creeping up over his face. “I’m sorry.” Oh force, _she_ wasn’t. He let her go and backed away. Rey, confident she could stand now, even if her legs were a little wobbly, opened her mouth to say something but the only sounds that came out were breathy little nothings that had her blushing even more.

“I…I guess we better follow…um...” Ben said, biting his lip as his worry nudged at her tentatively across the bond. He blushed again when she revealed to him some of her own giddy passion in reply, a smile tugging at his lips in spite of his chagrin.

There was a chuckle and Rey’s eyes caught a movement beyond Ben’s shoulder. Luke was shaking his head and walking down into the ravine via a narrow little path.

Ben turned and stared at his uncle, confusion radiating off him in waves as a scowl wrinkled his forehead.

“Last time you blew up the damn hut!” Ben yelled.

Luke’s ghost stopped and uttered an exasperated sigh. “Do you want to know how Snoke is contacting these children or not?” he said, raising an eyebrow. Ben huffed and clenched a fist but Rey felt a prickle of unease. Even through her efforts to get her thoughts back in order, something Luke said gave her pause.

“You mean _was_ contacting, not _is_ contacting,” she said. She felt a stab of cold fear from Ben.

“What?”

“Follow me, children, and pay attention” Luke called out, ignoring their questions as he moved further down into the ravine.

A surge of panic engulfed them both and they hurried to catch up with Luke.

“Uncle what are you saying? What do you mean?” Ben demanded. Rey didn’t miss the part where Ben called Luke uncle. Luke slowed, a gentle smile on his face.

“The answers you need are in this place.”

“Answers. Answers to what? What’s this about Snoke?”

Rey was almost running to keep up now as Ben stormed after Luke, his long legs helping him catch up with ease. She had to admit the oddly close and fractious relationship between Ben and Luke left her bewildered. Ben was a storm of anger, panic and desperate attachment to his uncle... there was so much need in him it broke her heart.

Luke slowed for a moment and turned to Ben. “This is where the temple encloses your presence in the force. You are hidden from Snoke in here. Although I don’t recommend locking yourself away in here while the galaxy burns.” Rey coughed, was that an admission she’d just heard? Rey and the crabby Jedi master had not exactly warmed to each other. For a moment she thought Luke’s eyes flickered to her and she wondered if he might actually address her separately from Ben. He didn’t, but there was a smile on his face so she figured that was something. 

They followed Luke along the bottom of the ravine until they began to ascend up towards the mountain again. Rey could see something up ahead, like a cave mouth, but too regular to be a natural formation. As they drew closer Rey realised there were old, worn steps that led up to the opening. Now this looked like the entrance of a temple.

“What is this place?” she asked.

“A place of connection. The temple was built over the ship below so it would never be found. Then they took out the specific component that they needed. From here you can see how the lines reach out across the galaxy. It was built by force users long ago to aid communication anywhere in the galaxy. Modern communications have taken over though, and so this became obsolete. Unless you’re Snoke.”

“You said his name again, uncle,” Ben said. Chills of dread shivered across the bond from him, mixing with the fear in her own soul.

“Yes,” Luke said, but did not elaborate any further. Ben’s brows drew together as he chewed at his lip, his fists clenching and unclenching as they continued to follow. She felt Ben’s emotions begin to heave and twist as though a storm was rising inside him. She reached out into the force and drew on it for strength, before extending her hand to touch his. His larger hand snapped around hers and he caught her gaze, relief flowing into him as he squeezed her hand in reply. After a moment he released her and they moved on, the growing light between them banishing many of their fears.

The climb up the ancient steps was longer than they expected and Ben and Rey were both breathing faster by the time they reached the top. The opening appeared to be of similar ancient construction as the one that lead to Reif’s domain on the other side of the hill. They followed Luke through the door way into a corridor that was little more than a tunnel hewn from the dark stone, its walls slanting inwards toward the top, while white glowing globes of light ignited one-by-one along the walls as they approached, extinguishing as their presence moved on. It seemed like an age before they reached the end of the corridor but was probably only a minute or two.

They stepped out into a wide cavern, its empty expanse revealed to them by the warm flicker of yet more glowing globes that came to life upon their entrance. Rey looked round the chamber, taking in its size and the luminescent globes spaced evenly around the walls along a line just above her head height - again the cavern seemed too regular to be entirely natural. Unlike a lot of so-called temples though, it was empty, just a vacant space. If she hadn’t felt the strength of the force, glowing with light and heavy with the dark, she would have thought the place to be devoid of any interest, a place to pass through without thought. Nothing here – no ancient force-linked treasures or other items that might draw thieves and scavengers.

Rey looked up and gasped. The cavern rose above them, its ceiling smooth and gently curved until it flattened towards the top, where the Prime Jedi symbol was clearly depicted, its meditative face looking down at her as she realised that this version showed only the light side of the force. She frowned, wondering what had prompted the change.

Ben’s reverent voice interrupted her thoughts.

“The Prime Jedi,” he breathed. “It’s all dark.”  Rey turned and looked at him, wondering what he was talking about until she realised he was pointing to the floor of the temple. She glanced down, and there was indeed a reciprocal Prime Jedi symbol tiled into the floor that was an all dark representation. She tapped Ben’s shoulder and pointed up. When he looked up his mouth fell open.

“Oh, that’s different,” he said. “The symbol on Ahch-To was one Jedi, half light and half dark. Now here they’re separate, but above and below each other.”

Rey blinked and her mouth fell open, incredulous.

“You’ve seen the original Prime Jedi symbol? You went to Ahch-To?” Rey demanded. Ben’s cheeks pinked a little.

“Well, no but, I may have seen a glimpse of it in your mind.”

Rey stopped and looked at him.

“You’ve been looking in my mind again without me knowing.”

Ben’s eyes widened. “No, no. I…um. I may have…err…meditated on what I saw in your mind from those few times…” his mouth opened and closed as he looked for the words. “I was _not_ sneaking into your mind or anything. I just…” Ben swallowed as his eyes beseeched her to understand.

Rey smiled. “Sure. I gained knowledge from you, and you stole some from me.”

Ben scowled. “I didn’t…Okay, maybe a little. You _stole_ plenty from me…”

Rey snorted. “Oh really. You jumped inside my head and started poking around. Not my fault you left a few things behind when I scared you off.”

Ben’s lips compressed together in a thin line. “So it’s my fault.”

“Of course it’s your fault. Teach you a lesson about wandering around, unasked, in people’s heads.”

Ben bit his lip but couldn’t quite hold back the smile pulling at the corner of his mouth. They seemed to be gravitating towards each other again, eyes locked on each other once more.

There was a cough. “Can we _please_ pay attention,” Luke gruffed beside them. Rey swore he grumbled something about Han and Leia but couldn’t quite make it out. That’s when Ben rolled his eyes and looked too much like his uncle and Rey started to giggle.

“I was never this rude to Obi-Wan,” Luke muttered moving away and looking out over the vacant expanse of the temple. Rey bit her lip and tried to breathe to banish her giggle but Ben’s suspicious look threatened to set it off again.

“Now, Rey, you come and stand here,” Luke said firmly. He moved away as Rey found the spot he pointed to. “Ben, you come and stand over here.”

“Is this important, standing in different positions?” Rey questioned, as Ben reluctantly complied with Luke’s order.

“Oh yes, if you two are going to pay attention I definitely have to separate you,” Luke said with a continuing air of long-suffering patience.

Ben growled something under his breath and turned to go back to Rey. Luke coughed again. A staring standoff ensued between Ben and Luke for a moment.

“Fine,” Ben snapped, and stayed where he was. 

Luke turned back towards the centre of the cavern. “Reach out with the force, light and dark. That way you will see all the lines.”

“There’s nothing there,” Ben grumbled. Luke sighed then pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger.

“I know,” Ben muttered peevishly. “This place is laden with the force and I’m too impatient to figure out what’s going on,” he intoned.

Luke raised an eyebrow and Ben glared back. Rey huffed, she was getting tired of these two being difficult with each other and instead turned her attention back to the empty temple. She’d read old stories about how Jedi temples were often protected in one way or another, from those without the skills and sensitivity to access what was hidden inside. This place would be no different. What was not apparent at first would surely be revealed if they looked in the right way.

In which case, she reasoned that looking at it in the conventional way would probably only be a hindrance, so she closed her eyes and did as she was asked. A moment later she could feel Ben doing the same. She caught a flash of his face across their bond, a mix of annoyed and sheepish as he did what his uncle said. She smiled in spite of herself. She really must talk to him about focusing more on the will of the force and less on his own will.

Refocusing on the centre of the room, she felt their power melding and working together, infusing the cavern with light and dark, pouring from them both. With a jolt, their energy found a channel and met in a conflagration of power at the centre of the expanse. Rey opened her eyes and gasped.

A twisting ball of purple light now writhed at the centre of the room, sending rippling shadows and bursts of colour splashing against the walls of the temple about them. Rey watched as tendrils of light began to unwind from it, into blue and red strings that uncoiled and stretched out to form a spidery network that reminded her of a nest, or maybe even the shape of the galaxy – and indeed it _was_ the galaxy. The same realisation was in Ben’s mind as they gazed at the wonder of light and dark, their minds open to each other. The tendrils rippled and twisted until they reached their furthest extent and then settled into place.

Luke stepped forward and pointed to a tendril that ended between Rey and Ben. It was thick and seemed to link strongly to the centre and all the other tendrils.

“All these lines are force communication lines. We are here.” The point Luke indicated was Lomas and the communication line was strong. Rey had already known - no doubt it was a result of Reif communicating through the network with his friends. There were other lines that looked equally as powerful, though. Rey guessed that one would lead across the galaxy to Crait, another to Corellia and one more to a place where she suspected the two First Order children were.

“Old lines fade when they’re not used,” Ben said, tension showing in his face. He moved off to a place nearby, his body intersecting several faded lines. A thick but fading red line led to a point that sent a shiver along Rey’s spine.

“Jakku,” she murmured. “The Emperor’s installation,” Ben muttered at the same time. Rey had never returned to Jakku, she had wasted so much of her life there already. She wondered what he might be talking about, though, and whether he might be referring to a forbidden place, several days’ journey from Tuanul - she’d never gone to explore the rumours because it was too hard to reach with the limited resources she’d had. Putting it from her mind, she refocused on the sculpture of contorting light before them.

Her eyes were drawn to a place that pulsed red on the peripheral edges of the curious spectacle, connected by a thin but intense red line, and located in the region of the galaxy that Rey suspected was the Unknown Regions. Ben’s mind was a whirl of emotion, seeming to know why this place pulsed so deeply, and she could almost feel the little threads of abstract memory pulling together as he realised. Rey felt a shiver of panic that caused the tiny hairs covering her whole body to stand on end. The memory of Snoke invading her mind and stripping it of all she knew sent a shudder through her, echoed by a gasp from Ben.

“Snoke is there…still,” Ben whispered. “How can he…?” He stopped and stared at Rey, not really seeing her. His mind was back in the throne room. His fists were clenched and his eyes widened as horror gripped him. His voice came out in a shaky undertone as he connected old and new information in his mind.

“All those structures Snoke had in his throne room. They concentrated the force.” Ben’s eyes widened with shock. “You remember, the structures that rose up out of the floor and the reciprocal structures that hung from the ceiling.” Rey allowed herself a brief glimpse of her memory of that place but she didn’t want to dwell on it. Ben continued the moment he sensed she understood.

“I thought he used them to increase his power, but there was more to it.” He shook his head, beginning to pace, clenching his fists and speaking to himself. “He must have a clone. He must have transferred his essence to a clone.” Ben was shaking, his fear and rage lashing out across the bond and deepening every dark line inside the swirl of force connection lines.

Rey felt her stomach drop. _No, don’t let it be true._

Rey looked at Ben, shocked by the wretchedness now haunting his face, and instinctively reached past her own fears to comfort him.

“Ben. Remember, you’re not alone. We’ll fight him together. I’m here to help you.” She didn’t know if he would believe her after the way they’d left things on Crait, but the vision they’d both seen on Ahch-To returned to their minds and she felt the raging sea of his emotions calm. Without hesitation, they both drew on the force together, mastering their fears, Rey letting in the strength of the light but Ben letting his fear focus him as he reached out to the dark. This combined light and dark, strength and focus, created a steely, balanced calm between them before they turned back to the pulsing map of force communications across the galaxy.

Rey’s eyes narrowed as she kept looking, not letting Snoke’s unsettling presence distract her from what else she could glean from the communication map. She reached out to the force, asking it to show her what she needed to know. There was a thin blue line that lead to Lomas, easy to miss, from the place where she and Finn had come from. Not too far away, but it pulsed too, no doubt registering Leia’s presence.

“It doesn’t just connect places, it’s connects people too,” she said. “Force sensitive people. They’re bonds linking each one. They get stronger the more they’re used. The more powerful they are the longer they last and the longer they can be felt by others.” She could see red lines congregating around some planets and blue lines surrounding others. That thick but fading red line that traced back from Jakku must go to Coruscant and, from there she could see many fading blue lines - that was where the Jedi had been for thousands of years.

Another thing she noticed was that some spots in the galaxy pulsed, as though someone who was using the force was there, but they were alone, unconnected.

“The Emperor wished to find this place,” Luke said.

“If Snoke knows where all these connections are…” Ben growled.

“You can only see them all here, in this temple. Finding them outside these walls is not as easy. Snoke knows some but not all. He’s become skilled at finding those who have a certain kind of presence in the force, like you. But you can’t find this place from out there,” Luke said.

“So you brought us here to find Snoke,” Ben declared. Luke pierced them both with a stern look that set Rey on edge, wondering if they were about to get another reprimand.

“No. You’re here to turn it off.”

Ben stared at his uncle. “What do you mean ‘turn it off’?” he demanded. Ben no doubt was thinking over the advantages of this communication map.

“In the centre,” Luke said, nodding towards the twisting connections at the centre of the cavern. “There is an object there. You must take it with you.”

“Won’t that break the links though?” Ben questioned, a frown creasing his forehead.

Luke smiled but shook his head as he looked at the glowing sculpture of light before him. “This is really only a mirror that shows a _reflection_ of each link. Snoke, and the children, are only _sensing_ that reflection. Those links are still there. The force will guide you to find them again…”

“Wait.” Ben jerked around, glaring at his uncle. “You said we were protected from Snoke in here. If we turn this off…”

“You can’t run from this, Ben.” The look between man and force ghost was an understanding of each other in that moment. Ben nodded. Rey felt Ben’s trepidation merging with her own but there was also determination. The temptation to hide was there but their determination to succeed, as they had before, was stronger.

Another thought occurred to Rey though.

“But won’t that also mean that Denea and the others won’t be able to link in either?” Rey said, worry nagging at her knowing how fragile Denea was on the inside in spite of her tough exterior.

“It’s best they remain hidden for now,” Luke said. “You’ll find them again.” Rey wasn’t so sure but, given what they already knew, it probably wouldn’t be hard to find them. They already had Reif and the two from the First Order, and Canto Bight wouldn’t be so hard to find but Rey suspected that Denea wouldn’t be so easy - Corellia wasn’t as simple a landscape as the other locations.

Something caught her eye, interrupting her thoughts. “What is that?” Rey said.

A dark red pulse had emerged from Snoke’s hiding place in the Unknown Regions. It appeared to be travelling slowly to them but in reality it would be moving at hyperspeed. Ben watched the pulse for a moment and she could feel him reaching out. Rey watched in fascination as a barely perceived, but still visible, answering pulse shot along the line leading towards Snoke’s hideout and, to her surprise, the line turned slightly purple. The purple colouration then ended where the red light travelled along the line. Rey watched Ben for a moment and knew that he had instinctively used the light to search out who was coming. For all his immersion in the dark side, his natural inclination, when not thinking about it, was to use the light. She smiled as she watched him concentrate.

“A Knight of Ren. Whoever it is, they’re coming our way,” Ben said, reaching out towards the sphere in the centre and pulling with the force. Rey could feel it would not be so easily dislodged and added her own power to Ben’s. Together their power seemed so much more than just the sum of their combined strength - it felt as though, when joined, it resonated and grew stronger, glowing bright in their hearts and minds as they reached for the entity at the centre of all the links.

The glowing tendrils curled back on themselves and faded, its power vanishing as the extraordinary living display receded back into a pulsing purple sphere. They watched in awe as it shrank into a smooth purple crystalline stone, with only a hint of purple light at its centre. The sphere sprang forward with a sudden jolt and flew towards them. It hovered between them as though unsure to whom it should go. If it was looking for the stronger of the two then of course it would hesitate, neither was stronger than the other. They already knew that.

Ben pushed the sphere towards Rey, relinquishing his claim on it. Rey watched in surprise as it rolled into her hand.

“You should have it,” he said. Rey felt warmth infuse her as the look in his eyes turned to...fondness. She regarded the sphere in her hand, insignificant to look at, but she could feel the dark and light perfectly balanced at its core. She touched it and a soft purple glow reflected about the temple walls. She stepped towards Ben and stretched out her hand and he touched it, the contact like a ripple that shivered over them both. Ben smiled at her and Rey felt her heart warm and expand.

 

 

Riona Ren’s eyes snapped open, her meditation broken. The link was gone. Silent. She reached out. She couldn’t find Snoke, Kylo Ren or the children. What had gone wrong?

She reached out to the force, commanding it to guide her. She had been working on her sense of each one in the force, determined to find them and bring them back to Snoke. His children.

How had she lost the sense of them? A pall of fear rose up within her but she reminded herself this was just fuel for her power. She used it to gain a greater hold on the force and pushed out.

Nothing. She could no longer feel the link. It was as though it no longer existed. Her fear rose higher but she refused to give in. She would find them. She hadn’t won the battle with Larkus just to fail now! It would take longer but she would find the children and bring them back to Snoke…

…and then she would kill Kylo Ren and the Jedi.

 

 

Finn had fallen into a doze as he watched Reif and Sidebolt fiddle with bits of communication equipment.

“I can find no reason why the comm is failing to work,” Sidebolt said. Finn’s eyes popped open again.

“We’ve tried everything,” Reif said, a note of defeat in his voice. Finn was feeling more and more defeated himself. They would just have to wait for Chewie to turn up again, whenever that would be.

Reif stopped and put down the pieces of the comm unit and looked about, a hint of worry etched across his young face.

“What is it?” Finn asked, suddenly wary. Reif was silent for a moment but then he shook his head.

“I don’t know. Maybe nothing,” the boy shrugged. He frowned as he chewed at his lip, then returned his attention to the comm unit, although the dejected look on his face said he was close to giving up.

“Why don’t we give it another try,” Sidebolt encouraged. Reif sighed and nodded. Slowly he began to put the pieces in place until it was ready for another try. He looked at it, scowled for a moment then reached out, his finger hovering over the switch briefly, and flicked the unit on.

A little red light flashed and there was a faint crackle of static. Everyone froze.

“It’s working!” Reif said, his face lighting up as he gave a whoop of joy.

“All right!” Finn said, giving the kid a pat on the back.

“Okay, let’s tune it in,” he said.


	16. Change of Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He could feel Rey reaching out to him across the bond, wanting to know what he was thinking. He grinned. For all her rejection of using mind probes with the children, she was still happy to go sifting through his mind for what she wanted. He let her see a little bit of his plan and her jaw dropped, a shiver of apprehension creating a shadow in their bond that linked into his own worries.  
> “Oh. Is that even possible…without…?”  
> “We’ll do it together.”  
> Rey nodded. “Okay.”

Poe Dameron was completely stumped.

He hadn’t thought that _anything_ could exceed the ludicrous dimensions of the Supremacy but, as he stood watching the holo-projection slowly rotate in front of him, he realised he’d been mistaken.  The Ascendancy’s broad expanse would have cost an entire sector’s GDP.

He crossed his arms over his chest and glared at the schematic. No less galling was the fact that the man who would have presided over this monstrous seat of power had been the one person he would have gladly blown into a zillion pieces. But, apparently, someone had beaten him to it. Poe sneered - he’d thank Hux, if he didn’t also want him blown into a zillion pieces.

He paced along the length of the holo image. This information had to have been sent by 3PO’s droid mole but its silence, following the announcement of Kylo Ren’s death, now rang alarm bells.

“Where did this intel come from, General?” he asked, tamping down the suspicion in his voice as he glanced at Leia.

“The information is authentic, Dameron,” Maz responded. She turned to fix him with her penetrating gaze, beady eyes intensified by her huge glasses.

 “Of course, Maz,” he said with some contrition. Poe smelled a rat, but he didn’t want to upset the elder, whose stare was unnerving at the best of times.

“It just seems a bit... _convenient_. Are we sure our mole hasn’t been compromised?”

“It could be a trap,” Leia conceded, “but the information came with a specific guarantee. I wouldn’t question its authenticity.” Leia waited for him to acknowledge her statement. Poe nodded and she continued, ignoring his obvious misgivings. “It was programmed to be sent to us by Kylo Ren himself, on the event of his death.”

Poe coughed, his mind floundering about for purchase as he tried to comprehend what the General had just revealed. His response was blunt and about all he could manage: “What!”

Leia stretched her hand towards the console that worked the central comm, her frail fingers working their way across the screen as they activated another holo image. Poe froze as the recording flickered to life. The face was unmistakable.

Kylo Ren’s steady gaze was now cutting straight through Poe’s brash exterior, despite it only being a holo, sending an involuntary tremor through his gut. He was left feeling shaken and exposed but, as quickly as his emotions banked and rolled, he managed to bring them back under control. Kylo Ren was dead and would never be able to take anything from him ever again.

Poe clamped both his jaw and his reactions shut as the fiend’s voice carried across the room, as though he was still alive to terrorise the galaxy.

“The Ascendancy will soon be travelling to the Khalak system,” Kylo Ren’s words were as implacable as his visage, and Poe’s eyes narrowed. “The weapon on board this ship has the capacity to turn any planet to a wasteland. This weapon was in the development process, until it was shelved when the Starkiller technology was advanced instead.” Kylo Ren paused, and to Poe’s surprise, something like regret clouded his eyes. “Starkiller always seemed like a grand vision - too large to succeed but this…it’s the vision of one who was heedless of its true impact on the future of the galaxy.”

The man’s dark gaze was steady. “You _must_ destroy it,” he commanded.

Poe coughed to cover the incredulous sound that would have otherwise burst from his mouth. Instead he cupped his chin with his hand, absently massaging his jaw in thoughtful contemplation as the image of Kylo Ren was replaced with the Ascendancy’s endlessly intricate layout and overzealous engineering specifications.

Rose Tico entered the central area and came to an abrupt stop as soon as she saw the holo image.  Her expression flickered between admiration and trepidation as she approached the vision, circling it slowly as she carefully studied its overall schematics whilst surreptitiously rubbing her swollen belly with a tender hand. She carried herself well, in spite of her relatively advanced pregnancy.

“So it’s true,” she breathed, almost reverently. “This is the Ascendancy.” She cast a furtive glance at the General as a concerned look gripped her features. “This was sent to us by Kylo Ren?” Leia nodded. “I don’t understand,” Rose said.

Poe scowled. There was no way he was going to believe that Kylo Ren had sent the Resistance details of how to blow up his own ship!

“It seems the Supreme Leader had no wish to allow _certain elements_ within his ranks to gain this level of power in his absence,” Leia said, as though reading his suspicious thoughts. She spoke with a calm assurance that he recognised, and he knew it had something to do with the force.

“What’s it got to do with us then?” Rose asked.

“There’s a weapon on board the Ascendancy. Kylo Ren believed no one should have it.”

Poe laughed. “No one but him, right?”

Leia scowled at him.

“What is this weapon?” Rose asked as she walked around the image, looking for a weakness to exploit.

Leia’s eyes focused on the data now flickering across the screen in front of her. “We’re not sure,” she said as she perused the information, “but it seems to be able to deliver a pulse that causes a cascade reaction, turning a planet’s atmosphere into a corrosive and toxic blanket. All life would die and the First Order would then be able to extract what they want, without resistance.”

The room was quiet as that sank in. Poe shivered, this was more than just genocide. His stomach roiled while Rose’s face had blanched.

When the hush threatened to become a yawning silence, Leia continued her recitation with grim determination.

“Apparently, it’s a weapon that Snoke had been developing before he…died,”

Poe had heard a raft of different rumours about Snoke’s death. Officially, the previous Supreme Leader had been killed when Admiral Holdo had used the Raddus to ram the Supremacy at light speed, an act that Poe held in the highest regard, as he did the person who carried it out. That official statement had quickly been followed by other theories, though - from assassination by Hutt crime Lords, to murder by Kylo Ren himself. The most popular rumour, which Poe was more inclined to believe, was that he’d been slain by the Jedi, but he’d already asked Rey about that and she’d told him that Luke had had nothing to do with it. That Rey also had Jedi abilities was an inconsistency in her explanation, but he couldn’t see how she’d have been able to project herself to the Supremacy, just as Luke had done on Crait, _and_ still be alive afterwards, let alone actually go there in person, kill Snoke and escape on her own without running into Kylo Ren. Finn and Rose had barely escaped with their lives and only because the Supremacy had been ripped apart a moment before their execution.

Poe swept such thoughts from his head - his ruminations hadn’t brought up anything in the past and probably wouldn’t now either.

Rose was busily scanning the image, using her specialised knowledge to locate details that were barely discernible to others.

“Here,” she said, pointing to an area under the nose of the ship. “This is where the pulse emanates from.” She moved back and indicated a location embedded behind the huge central exhaust ports.

“This is where the Kyber crystals would be located. No doubt they’re contained within a structure designed to resonate their power, and the pulse is released when it reaches a critical level.” Her eyes crinkled as she peered closer to the structure, muttering to herself then stopped as she zeroed in on one spot. “They force a disturbance into the beam which would then disrupt the chemical structure of the atmosphere. That’s what creates the toxic effect.” She grimaced and shook her head, “The Ascendancy really could kill a planet within minutes,” she continued as her lip curled in anger, “and the First Order certainly has the ability to mine the resources.”

Maz hissed in disdain. “No doubt they would bring in slave labour to do the dirty work then just move on, leaving behind little more than a sandy rock.”

Everyone was silent for a while as they stared at the monstrosity.

“If we could disrupt this structure somehow…” Rose traced her hand along the pathway between the Kyber heart of the weapon and the outlet at the nose.

“Seems they’ve added some tech aimed at recognising and dealing with a hyperdrive-powered attack,” Leia read from one of the files, her voice trailing away as the room quietened, all fondly remembering an ass-kicking, kind and brave woman with purple hair.

A beep pierced the silence, followed by a red flashing light - a call was coming in from an unsecured location. Poe quickly jumped to scramble the line before opening the channel, and a scratchy voice he’d recognise anywhere came through just as a miniature, grainy image appeared in front of him on the comm.

“Poe, is that you?”

Poe grinned but he wasn’t quick enough to answer before someone else beat him to it.

“Finn!” Rose cried, rushing over to the comm. “Where are you? What’s happening?”

“Rose, sweetheart. I’m fine. We’re all fine. How are you?” Finn’s goofy grin spread across his face as he spoke to his wife. Rose didn’t waste time with the obvious, though, and jumped straight into her own news.

“Finn, the cloaking device - it worked!”

“What?” he beamed. “Rose, that’s excellent! That’s amazing.”

Rose grinned but she couldn’t hide the look of concern on her face.

“Finn. Where are you? We’re going to send Chewie back soon, but the new cloaking device has to be installed first.”

“Yes, thank you. I love you. Um, we’re still on Lomas. Please come as soon as you can.”

Here Poe broke in. “Finn, we got news that Kylo Ren is dead.”

There was a moment of silence as they looked at each other.

Leia joined the conversation.

“Finn, we don’t have all the details,” she said, “but they say that Hux…is now Supreme Leader.”

Finn looked around him, as if he wasn’t alone, and was silent for a moment before he responded.

“General, Hux _is_ in command of the First Order,” he confirmed, but shook his head as he continued, “but he doesn’t have the power to keep command. There are factions in the First Order - it’ll rip itself apart.”

Leia nodded. “This could work to our advantage. Finn, we’ve received intelligence from Kylo Ren, programmed to be sent to us on his death. It includes all the technical details of their newest mega destroyer, called the Ascendancy. It contains a weapon that can turn a planet to a wasteland, enabling the First Order to mine it for every resource it has. He asked us to destroy it.”

Finn’s image buzzed and flickered as something interrupted the communication, his words lost in the interference before it cleared. Poe quickly worked to clear the interference. Finn’s image and voice reappeared again. “….you say that Kylo Ren sent information to the Resistance to _destroy his own ship_?”

“Yes. Finn I…” Leia began.

Another voice interrupted with a plaintive cry, “No, Finn! Rada and Leesh are on that ship!”

Poe frowned as Rose’s face registered complete surprise. Leia merely blinked and leaned closer to the comm.

“Finn, who’s that?” she asked.

“Ah, yes.” Finn reached out and drew a smaller figure towards him, so that a dark-haired boy could be seen in the projection, looking up at him with a pleading look on his face. “Meet Reif,” Finn explained, “my rescuer. As I’m sure Chewbacca told you, the First Order showed up and everything got messy after that. I, ah...” he paused here as though considering what to say next.

“You _what_?” Rose demanded, a look of both worry and suspicion crossing her expression. She peered closer, spying the packed-out side of his chest, and Finn’s sheepish grin only added to her unease.

“Well, I may have taken a shot. Just a graze, really, sweetheart. Reif here found me and his droid dragged me back to his place to patch me up. A bit of bacta, and I’m already on the mend!”

“You’re injured! How did… You tried to do something heroic, didn’t you? Finn, you _have_ to take care of yourself…and where was Rey when all this happened?”

A moment of silence. “Oh, um, Rey was running a diversion but she’s here with me. I mean, not right now but she’s here…somewhere.”

“She’s with Ben,” the boy piped up. Finn stiffened and turned towards the boy. His stern but imploring look would have been comical if Poe hadn’t felt a moment of disquiet as he focused on the name he hadn’t heard for many, many years…a name that probably meant nothing. He glanced at the General, who showed no reaction, and figured there was more than one person in this galaxy called ‘Ben’.

“Reif!” Finn hissed.

“What?” The boy’s innocent eyes looked up at Finn, not knowing what he’d just started.

“Who’s Ben?” Rose asked, her voice filled with intrigue. Poe rolled his eyes and smothered a grin at Finn’s unconvincing attempt at pretending he hadn’t heard her words.

Finn’s reply surprised them all. “General, can I speak to you in private?” He glanced at Rose for a moment, a look of regret and longing in his eyes.

To Poe’s further astonishment, the General nodded. “Transfer the transmission to my office,” she said, her expression completely unreadable. Poe blinked as his disquiet returned. Rose frowned, no wiser than Poe. They looked at Maz, who seemed to be suddenly interested in a speck on her glasses.

There was something strange going on here.

 

 

Ben was enchanted.

Purple light splashed across the temple walls and rippled over Rey’s gentle smile as she watched the strange force sphere respond to their touch. Her beatific wonder easily snatched his attention away from the mysterious relic glowing within her hands.

Luke had shown them the sphere - Luke, who was always looking for force relics and old teachings, when he should have been looking to the future. _Rey_ was the future.

Still, the man wouldn’t have brought them here if this new object wasn’t somehow important to defeating Snoke. Luke had been an unexpected light after Crait, and every time his uncle’s ghost had turned up since then, Ben had been in some kind of disaster. The grumpy apparition’s objective seemed to be just to keep him alive.

Today was different though. The force was moving in mysterious ways, turning his world upside down. With one stroke, everything had changed. He’d been walking through a narrowing tunnel of growing despair, and had been knocked off course by the same precious woman who’d sent him hurtling off at a tangent the last time, landing him in a place of possibilities. He mustn’t waste them this time. Rey was his future.

He wrapped his hands about hers as she held the sphere and, as she looked up at him, a moment of complete understanding drew them together. They were so close now, her eyes so soft, mouth so sweet. He touched her face and she laughed, _deep_ and _grating_.

He blinked. That wasn’t her laugh.

“Rey, what’s going on?” Something was off. He cast a wary glance around the temple as his mind raced.

“Uncle?” Luke was gone, and a shiver of panic assaulted him. _Gone again_. But this was different - he felt like he’d been left behind. He turned back to Rey and his heart stopped, his flesh prickling while something cold curled into his gut as he saw the cruel vision before him. It wasn’t Rey. The face looked like hers, but it was all wrong - she’d grown cold and cunning, her soft eyes had turned a hard ice blue.

The blood in his veins froze and his spine seized in horror as her mouth twisted into an inhuman smile.

“Did you think I wouldn’t find you, Kylo Ren? I knew you would be with her. I kept a little place in her mind just for me, when I looked for what _you_ were too weak to find. You cannot escape me, and neither can she.”

Ben’s throat had closed over. He tried to scream for Luke or Rey, but a strangled rasping was the only sound that came out.

“She will not stand by you,” the image taunted. “She will abandon you, just like your parents. She will come to _me_ when she realises how useless you are as a teacher. She will try to kill you when she realises who you really are, just like Luke Skywalker.” Ben looked down at the sphere, now glowing a brilliant blue, its imbalanced, betraying light twisting within its depth. The red luminescence of the dark side had vanished and Ben felt as though he had been erased. Left behind.

“See, you’re alone Kylo Ren. Come back to me. Together, we can make you strong _,_ so that the girl and her weak light can _never_ betray you.” Snoke’s voice was like a poison burning in his veins.

Ben recoiled at the roughened skin of the hand now gripping the relic, its grotesquely curling claws clamping over his pale fingers as though in a desperate attempt to hold on.

This was a lie. A lie he wouldn’t fall for again.

“No!” he cried. “Rey _won’t_ leave like others. She won’t hurt me!” Ben snatched the sphere, clutching it to his chest. Gloating laughter greeted his words, igniting his deepest fear - that Rey _would_ reject him and leave him. But Ben refused to let go of his hope…and the stone. Yes, it might only show the light in its depths now, but that light was _Rey_.

“You will not have me!” he swore. “Or her. Or the stone”

The figure before him morphed fully into his nightmare. Tall, powerful, and familiar. Snoke’s face was no longer ravaged and old, but the eyes were the same. Those same eyes that had haunted him for so long, the same twisted grin, the voice that haunted his nightmares... The oppressive presence that he remembered all too well, the jarring debilitating weight of it, reaching out and taking hold of him as if he was just a toy. Ben shrank from the touch, but couldn’t fight it off. He no longer believed the lie that he was alone but he also knew his strength could not match Snoke’s.

“Kylo Ren,” the malevolent vision hissed. “You weak fool. Did you think you could be rid of me so easily? Did you think I would not have made preparations for my apparent demise? Did you think you could _take what was mine_?”

Ben couldn’t move, terror holding him firmly in place. Snoke. It was _Snoke_...

“The time for mercy is gone, Ben,” the beast snickered. A hand, large and clawed, reached for him, fastening about his neck as it clenched tight.

“No!” Ben croaked. But he knew it was no use. He was lost. Snoke had returned, with _power_ , and he would win. He always won. Snoke laughed mirthlessly. “Yes, that’s right. The dark is patient and it _always_ wins”.

The choking hand squeezed tighter. Ben struggled and cried out but to no avail, his mind sinking into the darkness of fear, forgetting all he knew.

“No.”

Ben blinked. That wasn’t Snoke’s voice...

“Ben?” A sweet tone that he almost remembered - who was it?

Snoke laughed again.

“It’s too late, _Ben Solo_. Now, you will die.”

“No!” The feminine voice was louder now, more insistent, and this time it came with a wave of power.

Snoke growled. “You’re too late.” Ben frowned in confusion - Snoke had not directed this statement at him.

Unseen hands grasped Ben’s shoulders and shook him.

“Ben. It’s me, Rey. Fight! Hold on to the light. Hold onto me!”

His memory sparked as the force slammed into his former master. Ben gripped the power of her light, allowing it to meld jubilantly with his darkness, light and dark flowing through each of them in equal power as it should.

Something snapped and Snoke roared.

Rey. He reached for her. Snoke snarled as he tried to grasp Ben tighter but the monster’s grip was weakening. Ben pushed him away, using all of the combined force power between himself and Rey to strike out at him, and the image began to fade.

“I will come for you, Kylo Ren. I will come for you both.”

“No. You will not have him!” Her voice was powerful. He _loved_ that voice. Those words... she was fighting for him as though he mattered to her more than anything and his heart swelled. She was fighting for _him_.

“Rey,” her name was a whisper on his lips. His vision began to change as he looked down at her, watching her beautiful face coming back into focus, her chin quivering as she stared at him.

“Ben. Stop. It was just some kind of projection - Snoke isn’t here.”

Her face relaxed a little but her eyes were still wide and frightened, and the perspiration beading her face gave the only real clue as to how anxious she was.

“Ben. Let go.” He looked down and realised his hands were still around hers, crushing them with the sphere between them. He released her hands and stumbled back. He’d hurt her again. He never meant to but he’d done it again.

He knew his fears had always been a double-edged sword. He could use them to power the darkness within him but, just as much, the darkness used his fears as a tool to hurt those he loved. He couldn’t meet her frightened gaze, unable to bear the possibility that she may be looking at him as if he was a monster again. Shaking like a reed in the wind, he reached up and wiped the sweat from his forehead, trying to calm his racing heart at the same time.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you,” he said and, to his shame, he sounded like the frightened boy of long ago.

“It’s all right Ben. He’s gone. I was here and I helped you. Our bond, it’s stronger than he is.”

Her words made sense but his fears still clouded his thoughts. He felt the darkness circling him, its familiar touch sending a quake of anger through him. His rage spiked and he clenched his fists, feeling the need to lash out and, as a sob caught in his throat, he knew he wouldn’t be able to stop himself. He was losing control, just like he always had after Snoke had…been there.

A wave of horror crashed through him. He’d been living in a bubble of delusion, pretending he could just forget about the galaxy and be with Rey, as though the dark side would never come after him again. For too many years he’d been its captive as unrelenting despair had wound its way into his soul.

_You’re not alone._

He’d always been alone...until…he met her.

He looked at her.

His usual response when his fear and rage surged like this was to take it out on something around him, until it receded and he could think clearly again. But he couldn’t do that now. Not with Rey.

“Ben, take my hand,” she said, reaching out to him. He stared at her hand and swallowed.

_Just take it, you idiot._

Of course she heard the words he yelled in his head, and she stepped forward to touch his hand.

“Ben, reach out to the light,” she gently instructed. It felt like a switch had been flipped, cutting off the fears that fed his furies.

Her voice soothed him. “Your light is stronger, I can feel it. You fight it, but it’s your true strength. Ben, please…”

He forced himself to breathe, recalling an old lesson from Luke - letting the force flow in with each breath. His racing heart slowed a little. He would be all right.

He looked at Rey and found no fear or loathing, only love and concern, and his flailing emotions now found a direction. He _couldn’t_ let the past ruin what future they had. He would _not_ allow Snoke to return. His former master was dead, and he was going to stay that way.

Ben took a deep breath, surprised at how steady he now felt as he held on to her hand in earnest.

“I have to go back, Rey. I have to stop him. He’ll take over the First Order and this time he will destroy everything in his way.”

“And I’ll go with you,” Rey said, determination and…something more…something that took his breath away, now shone in her eyes.

And it frightened him.

“No. I have to do this alone.”

The jolt of hurt from Rey ripped at him more than he expected. It was like a little dagger cut in his gut.

“Ben! No. I promised to stay with you,” Rey begged. He trembled. He couldn’t allow Snoke to hurt her again. It nearly ripped his heart in two when he’d seen him tear into her mind when they faced him on the Supremacy and Snoke would never be taken unawares a second time.

He smiled at Rey and nodded, letting her put her arms around him, but he would hide his intention to go alone. He’d return to the First Order and the Ascendancy, take the ship where he needed to go and destroy Snoke.

“We have to tell Leia,” Rey said, and Ben froze.

“Why?”

Rey pulled back, a frown on her face as she looked up at him. He winced as he pushed her out of his mind, to prevent her from discovering his purpose.

“What’s the point of fighting the First Order, when Snoke is the real target?”

A memory came to mind. The real target.

“My message!” Panic ripped through him. “I asked C3N1 to send a message if I died.”

Rey’s mouth dropped open and her stare grew more alarmed. “You thought you were going to die?” He could feel a surge of unease from her, quickly followed by a wave of anger. He spoke quickly.

“I ordered my droid to send a message to my mother if I died, asking the Resistance to blow up the Ascendancy.” Rey’s mouth dropped open and her displeasure sparked.

“But if they do that, Rada and Leesh will die.”

“And a lot of other people,” Ben reminded her. He almost didn’t care, he just needed the Ascendancy in one piece, so he could kill Snoke.

“That mustn’t happen. Ben, we have to stop it!”

His mind was racing, trying to assess all the outcomes.

“You’re right. I have to talk to my mother,” Ben said, looking around. Where was his uncle?

“Luke!” he shouted. As always though, the man was nowhere to be found whenever Ben called him.

“We have to turn this thing back on,” he said, reaching for the sphere.

Rey stepped away. “Ben no. Wait, Luke said we have to shut it down.”

“After we talk to my mother.”

“And let whoever is coming find us…or them?”

Ben laughed. “Let them come. We’ll deal with them.”

“Oh really. What if it’s not us they’re after? What if they want the children first?” Ben could feel her anger sparking and smiled, thinking how beautiful she looked in that moment, her protective instincts clear in the way she now stood glaring at him. He loved her for it and Snoke would kill her for it. He was wise enough to know that Snoke would not be taken unawares again.

If he was going to kill Snoke he had to keep Rey out of it. He didn’t need a repeat of the way things went down in the throne room when he killed Snoke, or rather, _thought_ he’d killed him. He swallowed and reached out to the force for guidance.

“Maybe there is another way, one that Snoke won’t know about.”

Rey frowned. “We’re not going to use the comm. in your ship.”

Ben rolled his eyes in exasperation. “No, the First Order would intercept that before it got to hyperspace, or any other transmission we tried to send.”

He could feel Rey reaching out to him across the bond, wanting to know what he was thinking. He grinned. For all her rejection of using mind probes with the children, she was still happy to go sifting through his mind for what she wanted. He let her see a little bit of his plan and her jaw dropped, a shiver of apprehension creating a shadow in their bond that linked into his own worries.

“Oh. Is that even possible…without…?”

“We’ll do it together.”

Rey nodded. “Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to those who left a comment last time. This chapter has been a bit tricky as there are a few plot things I had to get right. A big thank you to ColliderofHadron for helping me get this chapter in order. Since I last posted she has updated her fic Sons of the First Order as well. I hope you enjoy this update.


	17. Calm Before The Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What do you mean by this ‘thing’ between Rey and Ben?”  
> “I don’t know, it’s like they’re…not enemies.”   
> “Well, technically,” Leia began, “if he’s been kicked out of the First Order and he’s no longer the Supreme Leader, then they’re not.”

Snoke _seethed_. So, they dared to force his hand, did they?

He was troubled enough by the emergence of Skywalker across the tenuous divide between life and death but it meant his own plans were now in flux. But there were always _other_ ways to achieve his objective...

He inhaled and exhaled in measured respiration. Opening his eyes gradually, squinting in spite of the low level of light, he determined that his new body was ready - the transfer of his essence had been mostly successful. He had rested and waited long enough, now it was time to put his new body to use.

With a slow, purposeful movement, he reached up and touched the inner surface of the pod and its cover sprang to life with illuminated symbols and figures, growing brighter in increments. Blinking as its soft blue light settled his mind after his confrontation with that young _fool_ , Kylo Ren, he enabled the emergence sequence, its cover then split down the centre, peeling back and exposing him to the abrasiveness of the air within his regeneration chamber. 

Snoke’s new body shivered in the slight chill of the darkened room. His eyes took a little longer than expected to adjust and his breathing was still gently laboured - the Kaminoan cloning process was excellent, but his DNA was old and the transfer of his essence from the Supremacy to this fresh receptacle had not gone entirely to plan.

Touching the keypad at his side, the pod began to tilt until he was standing upright, and he stepped forth into the room.  Glancing down at himself, he was a little disappointed to note his skeletal frame remained, in spite of its increased strength and functionality. A medical droid floated forward and offered him a robe, but he pushed it away - he wanted to inspect this new form first, and took a shaky step towards the mirror that awaited him at the other end of the room.

It took him a moment to adjust to the sensation of working his new muscles and he had to call upon the force for strength, but he managed to move forward, staring at his reflection in curiosity as he slowly edged closer. Although he recognised his features, there were some changes. His sharp blue eyes took in the pale skin wrapped over muscle and bone, still wrinkled and lacking the resilience of youth, but definitely superior to his previous paper-thin covering. Although his frame was no longer a painful, twisted skeleton either, it still held a slight stoop of age, but at least his breathing sounded more normal – having lost its laboured rasp.

The Kaminoans had offered to infuse other, physically stronger DNA into his clone but he had refused. It was more important that he retain his full powers in the force, and he was aware it would be easier and safer for his essence to transfer to a body it fully recognised as its own. The process was delicate enough, without adding the complexity of foreign DNA. Besides, he certainly did _not_ wish to contaminate his new body with the human DNA they had offered - humans were too easily manipulated for him to ever consider such a malaise.

He smiled now, looking for all the world like a crack had appeared in his otherwise implacable visage. As he had demanded, the scar disfiguring his head had been retained, giving him a permanent reminder of the final insult that had set him on this path. He considered his reflection overall and was generally pleased with the effort. The Kaminoans may yet retain his blessing.

“Robes,” he said to the droid. First, white gossamer swathes were wrapped around his newly emerged flesh then a second robe of rich blue, its sumptuous texture burdening his frame with a noticeable heaviness. The robe was folded across his front and fastened with a heavy belt of gold links and deep blue jewels - attire befitting his status as the _true_ Supreme Leader. Pretenders to his throne would pay the price.

He must not waste any further time though. The force was moving and he must shape events before it was too late.

“You should not exert yourself, Supreme Leader, until your body is used to its new environment.”

Snoke ignored the droid and it’s programmed medical advice. The force would strengthen him, as it always had. He turned and strode from his chamber but slowed after a few steps, his body quickly fatiguing as though it was weighed down by double gravity.

“Your strength will return in time, Supreme Leader, but I advise no sudden or strenuous movements for the next twenty-four hours.”

Snoke waved his hand and the droid bowed its head and retreated, with another wave, the doors to the larger room beyond opened, and he stepped into the cooler air of the external chamber. He walked unaided and unattended to his seat at the grand desk of his solarium and, with relief, sank into the depths of comfort that was due him.

Placing his hands on the carved stone and inlaid wood desk he closed his eyes and recalled his last battle, determining why he had failed and what he must do next. He trained his mind on the children, but their path was darkened – for now. He could still feel Riona Ren’s journey through space. That one had taken eagerly to his training; he should have trusted her more from the beginning. Her lack of strength was more than compensated for by her loyalty and the fact that her ideals aligned so strongly to his own.

He had expended too much effort on bending the power of Ben Solo to his own purposes and had barely succeeded when…Snoke burned at the reminder of his _betrayal_. He would not forget. That he now discovered the whelp was still alive was no surprise - that imbecile, Armitage Hux, would have been too eager to grasp his chance for power to check that the task had been properly fulfilled. Now, Ben Solo would bend to his will again – or he would die.

It was the girl that was the problem. He had not seen her in his original plans or recognised the threat she posed, but he would not be caught out again.

He closed his eyes and sank down into a deep meditation, plunging into the depths of the dark side and demanding it give up its secrets. Visions swept before him, elusive and twisting, but he persevered until he was certain of the play of things.

Yes.

He opened his eyes and breathed. A cold smile spread across his face and the barest hint of a chuckle disturbed the dark repose of the solarium. He reached out with his long, bony fingers to bring up his communication array. A face with large green eyes and blue skin came into view.

“Yes, Supreme Leader.”

“Prepare my transport.” The eyes closed and the head bowed in obeisance before the image disappeared. Snoke flicked his fingers across the screen again, summoning a second, more important servant. Riona Ren’s surprised but single-minded gaze locked with his. He admired a mind that could calmly dispatch with all attachments that stood in the way of greatness. A pity she would have to be sacrificed. 

“I have a new plan for you, my apprentice.”

 

 

Finn looked down at the child beside him. “Reif, perhaps you should go and find Rey and Ben. Let them know I have the General on the comm,” he requested. Reif looked reluctant for a moment.

“I’m sure Rey wouldn’t want to miss out on speaking to the General,” he encouraged and, to his relief, Reif nodded and scampered off in search of the other two.

Leia’s face reappeared, and it was clear she was now sitting in her office.

“Finn, what’s going on there?”

“Kylo Ren is alive,” he blurted out. Leia didn’t look at all surprised by his announcement, which should have keyed him in right then, but…

“For some reason, Rey insists on calling him Ben!” Finn continued. “I guess it’s for the kid’s sake, because that’s what he told Reif his name was. The kid, Reif, he’s force sensitive and…I don’t know, he seems to look up to Ren.”

The General’s implacable expression changed, now reflecting a revolving door of emotions, but Finn was too caught up in his report to fully notice.

“And that’s not all.” Here, he took a breath. “General, I’m afraid that Rey may have fallen under Kylo Ren’s influence as well. I mean, I don’t know if it’s because of the force, Rey and Ren being force users and all…”

“Finn, slow down,” the General interrupted. Finn took a breath. Yes, this was a lot to take in and the General hadn’t seen the way those two looked at each other. He remembered how fast he and Rey had become friends - she made friends so easily, trusted so easily and now, watching her with Ren it worried him. She knew who Kylo Ren was though, all the bad parts, so it must be more than that. He could only think that it had something to do with the force - maybe force users were drawn together, although he only had Rey and Kylo Ren to base that on.

“Start from the beginning, please,” Leia said.

“Right, yes, okay. Ahhh, apparently Hux tried to kill us all with a blast from the Supremacy and well, obviously he missed or, at least, this ... _thing_ we’re in was able to withstand the blast.

“That’s not all though, General. Reif can talk to younglings in the First Order - they’re part of some kind of group being trained in the force. They said that Kylo Ren wanted them dead but, I don’t know, he seems just the opposite and well... there’s something about him that’s changed. Maybe it’s Rey. General, there’s something going on there.”

Her next question surprised him.

“You say that Reif and Rey are calling him ‘Ben’.”

“Aahh, yeah. I don’t know what that’s about, but I think Rey’s determined to go with that name, rather than confuse the boy.” He stopped here, surprised by the faraway look in the General’s eyes.

“What is it, General?” he asked. Leia turned to him, a sad smile on her face.

“You should call him ‘Ben’,” was all she said, but she didn’t give him a chance to question that. “What do you mean by this ‘ _thing_ ’ between Rey and Ben?”

“I don’t know, it’s like they’re…not enemies.”

“Well, technically,” Leia began, “if he’s been kicked out of the First Order and he’s no longer the Supreme Leader, then they’re not.”

Finn opened his mouth to refute her statement but closed it again when he realised that there was a logic to this, _weird logic_ but logic none the less. He sighed.

He leaned closer to the holo recorder and lowered his voice as though someone might hear.

“Look, I know Ren killed Snoke and that Rey went to try and turn him from the dark side. I _also_ know it didn’t work,” he said.

Laia nodded. “Ben is a complicated man, Finn, but you need to go with this. Rey knows what she’s doing.”

Finn blinked. “Okaay.” Did Leia know more than she was letting on here? And there it was again, the name ‘Ben’ seemed to roll of Leia’s tongue as easily as it did Rey’s. Before he could say anything further Leia changed the topic.

“Finn, what’s this about children on the Ascendancy?” she asked, suddenly frowning.

“Oh, right. Yes. Rey has discovered, through Reif, that there are force-sensitive children who communicate through some kind of force-powered link, and two of them are on the…actually they said they were on the Supremacy, not the Ascendancy. I think that was just a moment of confusion but…”

“Did these kids say anything else about the First Order?”

“Oh yes. Apparently they’re not happy that Hux is the Supreme Leader, I can understand that, and that he’s far more inclined to waste lives than either Snoke or Ren. As I was saying though, and I think Ren…ah, _Ben_ …thinks the first Order will tear itself apart under Hux, because of all the factions. But General, one thing surprised me - all of the younglings in this link supported the Resistance, including the ones from the First Order. General, there must be others from the First Order who would help us if they could.”

Leia held up a hand. “Finn, there are things here we need to discuss with the others, but we need to be careful who knows about these children…”

Leia stopped and looked away from the holo recorder, her mouth dropping open as her body tensed.

“General?” he called, leaning forward to look more closely at the reason for the interruption.

Through the holo recorder, he could see an image materialising in the room next to her, kneeling, and he gasped when he saw that it was Kylo Ren. The man was reaching out, placing a hand gently on hers as he addressed her in a soft tone.

“Mother.”

Finn’s jaw hit the ground. _What_ in the monsters of Kessel!!!

“You must not destroy the Ascendancy. Not yet. Snoke is still alive.”

Leia took no notice of his words, but instead gripped his hand, alarm written in every fibre of her body.

“Ben. Are…are you a projection? What are you doing? Luke _died_ when he…he projected.”

“Rey’s helping me. We’re doing this together, even though you can only see me. We can’t stay long.”

“General, what’s going on?” Finn asked in alarm and the image of Kylo Ren turned and scowled at him.

“Ben,” Leia interrupted sharply, “tell me again about Snoke. What do you mean he’s still alive?”

Ben’s face grew pensive as he took a breath. “He appeared to me and Rey as a projection. Luke helped me find his location.”

“Luke,” Leia gasped, hope shining in her eyes. Ben nodded. “Yes, he…he comes back sometimes to help me,” he said. Leia nodded and a smile spread across her face. Ben huffed in exasperation but then his brow wrinkled in apprehension. “Mother, Snoke had a clone…he’s transferred himself to this clone.”

Leia appeared to diminish. Her shoulders slumped as she took in this information, shaking her head in disbelief. Finn felt the hair on the back of his neck prickle.

“We have to go. Rey’s growing tired and I won’t let her expend herself any further.”

The image began to fade.

“Ben, wait!” Leia leapt from her chair to seize him in her small and fragile hands. Finn watched in horror as the General wrapped her arms about her enemy as though he were the dearest person in her life. For a moment, the two held each other and then Kylo Ren faded away.

Finn stared. Kylo Ren. Ben. What was going on? Had he really called her ‘mother’?

“General?”

Leia turned to him, a fierce look in her eye. “You will take care of him. You will ensure he makes it back to me.”

“General, I…” Finn felt his world turn upside down and inside out. A light flickered on, so bright his brain cringed from the glare. So _this_ was why Rey was so determined to save… _Ben_.

Finn felt like a daft idiot. Why hadn’t he made the connection before? He shook as a memory hit him from out of the depths - Han had called him ‘Ben’ on Starkiller. There were things he’d forgotten from the haze of those first mad few days after he left the First Order. Some things had been a blur, others, just bits and pieces of memory. His recollections of that short period had dimmed after he woke up on the Raddus but now…snippets suddenly fell into place.

“Snoke stole Ben from me, just like he stole you from your family,” Leia said gravely. “He just did it under our noses, bit-by-bit, until I could no longer hold on to him.”

Finn looked at her and saw the determination and the plea in her eyes. He thought of Rose and their growing child…and appreciated how his deepest fears were Leia’s painful reality. He nodded in full understanding.

“I will if I can,” he said. They stared at each other for a moment, both aware that they were trusting the other for something with no guarantees.

There was a buzz as Leia’s comm unit interrupted.

“Yes.”

“General, Chewbacca is ready to go and he’s not keen on waiting on protocol.”

“All right,” she said, and turned to Finn. “I need to speak to Chewie. I’ll put you through to Poe again.  And Finn...”

He knew what she was going to ask. “Yeah, I won’t speak about…Ben, to the others.”

He watched her expression as it softened into a smile. “Thank you…oh,” she paused and looked him in the eye, “make sure you tell your wife to take it easy. I’m worried she’s pushing herself too hard.”

“Absolutely,” he promised. All other thoughts drained from his mind as he focused on Rose. He loved that woman so much, she had a heart that was too fierce even for the likes of Hux. His breath would never fail to be halted by the memory of her biting Hux’s hand as they knelt on the cold floor of the Supremacy, awaiting execution. Yes, she was fierce, but she was soft, too, and she cared, maybe too much. She loved him, in spite of his shortcomings - no-one understood him like she did, and he understood her, which was why he would have to be firm and tell her to take it easy.

Poe’s image reappeared in front of him.

“Finn, what’s going on? Who is this ‘Ben’ person?”

Finn looked at his friend, he loved the guy but he didn’t think he’d take too well to learning about Ben. Instead, he waved a dismissive hand.

“Oh, just some force-user Rey picked up.” Finn tried not to cringe at his choice of words. Poe’s eyes narrowed and Finn knew he needed to change the subject fast and he had just the topic to divert Poe’s suspicions.

“Poe, there’s something more important. Snoke is still alive. If we destroy the Ascendancy now, we’ll lose the one weapon that might actually destroy him.”

Poe’s mouth dropped open. “What? How?” Finn felt like he was digging a hole he couldn’t get out of.

“Yeah, look, this Ben guy thinks Snoke’s still alive. Rey does too.” Finn tried to slow his words down. He was going to trip himself up and Poe was already forming the question of how reliable this information was. Finn was just trusting that Ben and Rey knew what they were talking about – they both had reason to be truthful about this.

“They reckon he had a clone – I don’t know. Must be some kind of force stuff, you’ll have to ask Rey when we get back.”

“Ask Rey. Wait, where is Rey?” Poe asked.

Finn was saved from answering by an interruption from Maz. “I knew it. I have felt something. I didn’t want to accept it, but that explains a lot,” the old woman said. “Finn, there’s more though, isn’t there.”

“Yes, the err…children that Reif has been talking to told us about Hux being the new Supreme Leader, but that his grip on power is being undermined by various factions. The First Order will rip itself apart without the Resistance doing anything but, if Snoke’s still alive... well, that changes everything.”

Rose came back into view in the holo image and, as he leaned closer, he could see the fatigue around her eyes. More than that though, he recognised the look on her face.

“Rosy, are you sure you’re not pushing yourself too much? Whatever it is, surely you could take a break and…” Rose held up a hand, pinning him with one of her _I’m talking now_ looks.

“The data Kylo Ren provided us shows a possible way to destroy the Ascendancy. I need to look into it more, but it definitely has a flaw in the system,” she grimaced. “The problem is that it comes with a sting in the tail.” Now she really did look tired.

“Sweetheart, you’re about to say something I’m not going to like, right?” he said. She nodded and looked down at their baby. He really wasn’t liking whatever this problem was.

“The only weakness I can see in the system is _after_ it fires. The drain on power leaves it vulnerable to an internal stall that could also stop the venting procedures, meaning that the next time it fires, if the stall goes for long enough, it will blow itself to pieces.” She shook her head. “But it has to fire at least once, at full power first.”

They looked at each other for a moment. Finn got the distinct impression that Poe was about to say something that would in some way go against the General’s wishes. Rose also appeared to be waiting for the hammer to fall.

“So,” Poe said. “We make sure Snoke is on the Ascendancy when it blows.”

He looked at the others. “First though, we need a sacrificial target.”

 

 

Hux stood on the bridge of The Supremacy.

He understood why Ren had liked to stand there, looking down upon his domain and considering all that lay before him. Hux smirked, but it was _his_ galaxy now. Snoke had set everything up to perfection, all he had to do now was maintain the machine. And keep the idiots from ruining it. He’d had enough of their selfish requests for freedom or _special considerations_ and all manner of other unreasonable demands. Everyone must contribute, play their part in the order of things to ensure a properly functioning society. No-one was special. Everyone would co-operate or they would feel his wrath.

Hux smiled. His _wrath_. He liked the sound of that.

Ensign Geddi approached. “Sir, all non-essential personnel have been transferred to the Ascendancy. There was a small disturbance among the slav… _mining_ and reclamation workers. However, that has been quelled by Captain Phasma and her troops, without any problems. Captain Phasma has returned to the Supremacy and we’re ready to depart.”

Hux turned to the Ensign and was pleased to see the underling had taken time with his uniform. Little things like that spoke of a man’s suitability as an officer.

“Has the child cohort been returned to the Ascendancy as well? I need them to continue their training in regards to the _mine workers_ ,” Hux said. “They need to understand the mechanisms for controlling the scum of the galaxy and enforcing a proper work regime for non-human species.”

“Yes, Supreme Leader. They’re currently under the direction of General Addak. Although the General did suggest that it would be beneficial for the children to experience battle, and how to conduct themselves during a melee such as this.”

“I’m sure he would, considering it would mean he’d also be able to attend the disciplining of the Khalak system himself,” Hux snorted in disdain. “Our foray to the Khalak system will be brief, a mere formality. All they will need is a briefing on our return.” Hux raised his chin, remembering the harsh realities of his own upbringing. “No, it’s essential that our next generation of officers and troopers be accustomed to the management of the… _expendable_ worker cohort, and for that expendable worker cohort to learn their place in all of this.” Hux waved a benevolent hand towards the panorama of space and the other ships in view. He had long ago accepted that, for the good of the many, some sacrifices must be made.

“As you wish, Supreme Leader,” Geddi murmured as he affected a slender bow that greatly impressed Hux. He liked the sense of due deference, without the grotesque and sycophantic display some had begun to annoy him with.

“Sir.” Another ensign appeared to his side and saluted. Hux raised an eyebrow as he turned to the quivering woman, waiting for her to continue.

“We have detected a signal, it’s unclear yet where it leads to, but it’s coming from Lomas. We believe it to be using a scrambling technique that the Resistance has used before.”

Hux pursed his lips. The Resistance was becoming less relevant as the power of the First Order intensified. Hux no longer had to consider Kylo Ren’s paranoid delusions about a defeated band of criminals taking over the galaxy, and he could now simply ignore that sort of waste of time and resource.

Still, a niggling thought at the back of his mind warned him to at least check the report.

“Send a cruiser to check it out, but make sure they return to the Ascendancy before we return from the Khalak system.”

The Ensign stood straight, clicked her heels together and saluted. “Yes, Supreme Leader,” she barked before turning on her heel and marching away. Hux sighed, the Resistance was no more. There had been almost no activity since Crait and the fact that Kylo Ren saw this as a concern, like some kind of calm before the storm, had bugged Hux no-end. He would no-longer allow the bogey-man threat of the Resistance to waylay the proper working of the galaxy under the First Order… _his_ regime.

“Sir, we’re ready for light speed,” another officer spoke in professional tones. Hux smiled, turning his thoughts from the trivial to far more important matters. He found himself enjoying a newly focused and professional work place. Finally he could get on with controlling the galaxy.

“Then let us depart.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I decided it was time to hear what some of the others are up to in this hellofalongstory. Thank you to ColliderOfHadron for betaing this chapter (she saved you from some seriously icky Snoke clone stuff). I hope you all had a good Christmas and New Year as well. May this be a Reylo year.


	18. We Can Fix This

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey looked up at Ben, her mouth dropping open as realisation hit them both. All of her struggles to fix the saber on her own had been a fool’s errand, a lesson they had refused to learn! 
> 
> They’d broken it together, they would have to fix it together.

Ben opened his weary eyes to see Rey looking as exhausted as he felt. As she looked up at him, he pulled her into his embrace and they leaned into each other as they held the sphere in their hands.

He wanted to help her regain her strength by drawing on the force together, _feeling_ how it worked - the more they did together, merging as one, the more they could achieve. Now in recovery, they needed the force to minister to them as one.

Instead, his mother’s face came to him, aged and worried, and not what he was expecting. He’d felt her concern for him when she’d fled to Crait and, now, he reflected, it bothered him how much he’d despised her then. Oh, he had reasons, but…could he _really_ blame her for everything, when it was Snoke who had stirred up his mind against her? He shut his mind off from the inevitable place these thoughts would lead, not ready to go there yet. He wrapped up his pain and guilt, smothering it with the power of the force as he had done a million times before, except he couldn’t quite shake the notion that he was cheating somehow. One day he would have to face up to what he’d done…

Rey, feeling his turmoil, wrapped her smaller hands around his as he held the sphere. Her caress felt so precious to him and, as she raised her eyes to look at him, he was overwhelmed to see a compassion so deep he wasn’t sure he could name it. Leaning down and resting his forehead on hers, he knew that she understood. Her closeness was a healing balm and a comfort to him.

“You keep it,” she murmured as she gently pushed the sphere towards him. “You’ll need it to find Snoke.” Ben frowned. Was she leaving it to _him_ to find Snoke? His fear of being left alone rose up to tear at his calm.

“I’m coming too,” she reassured, holding his hands tighter. “I promised to stay with you, remember?” The dark part of him rejoiced in her promise and yet the thought left a bitter taste in his mouth - he wanted her to stay because she _wanted_ to, not because she had to. He turned his hand over and let the sphere slip out of his fingers to rest in her palm.

“No, you keep it. I know where Snoke will be but I know you’ll do what’s right with it.” He could feel her doubts but was certain this was better, pushing the stone back towards her and wrapping his larger hands around hers instead.

Rey smiled, wriggling closer, and he obliged with more enthusiasm than what would have once been proper for a Supreme Leader with his _enemy_. With Rey in his arms and her mind merging with his, they both felt a pull that had nothing to do with the force. Drawing her closer, she turned her face up to his and crawled higher up into his lap. This time he waited for her to make the moves, letting her slide a hand behind his neck, pulling his mouth down to hers.

Engulfed by an urgency that galvanised his desires, he deepened the kiss, sliding his hand over her shoulder and down her arm, daring to graze his thumb along the curve of her breast. His touch faltered when he worried that his audacity might not be welcome, unsure how to proceed, but Rey’s kiss grew hungrier, and she sighed against his lips as she pressed closer.

Encouraged by her response, he allowed his thumb to caress the same line of her breast again and Rey arched towards him, as though she wanted him in the same way he wanted her. His heart stuttered and his stomach flipped as his pulse roared into life, desperate for more of her taste and touch. Instinctively sliding his fingers into her hair, he tilted her head a little sideways and began trailing gentle kisses across the soft skin of her cheek to her ear, nibbling at the lobe for a moment. Her little gasp emboldened him and he began to trace a line down her neck with his lips, revelling in her warm scent. He noted with satisfaction that Rey’s pulse beat as fast and strong as his own, and her skin was raised in goose bumps as a soft sigh escaped her open mouth.

He was about to claim the sweetness of her mouth again when the galaxy, for the third damn time, got in the way.

The sound of a child’s footsteps echoed through the temple in the direction of Reif’s home below. Kylo, who still emerged from time to time, growled and possessively held Rey tighter, but she gently pushed him away with a sweet promise in her smile. Ben didn’t resist, almost grateful for the space between them, just for the rush of gratification when he saw the outright lust in Rey’s eyes.

“One day I’m going to have you alone. No interruptions!” he vowed, his voice a deep growl he barely recognised. Rey’s eyes grew wide and dark but, before she could respond, Reif burst in and ran towards them.

“Ben! Rey! Come quickly. We’ve fixed the comm and contacted the Resistance. Finn is talking to them now.”

Rey sat up as a shock of alarm rushed through her.

“What?”

“Finn’s talking to The General,” Reif said.

“No!” Rey said in horror. “Any signal will be picked up.”

Ben frowned. “I doubt they’d be looking for that kind of signal…”

“Maybe but I wouldn’t put it past some eager young ensign who just might, in case they missed us the first time. This sort of mistake can get people killed,” Rey muttered. She pushed herself to her feet and wobbled, not quite recovered from their projection efforts. Ben was by her side in an instant to help her, pulling on the force heavily, letting it flow into himself and across the bond. Rey took his hand and squeezed it.

Without another word she took command of the situation, indicating for Reif to lead the way. Sauntering along behind her, Ben felt his heart swell as he watched her. There was so much, _too_ much, about her that made him care. He wanted her by his side, wanted her to be safe and wanted her in ways he wasn’t sure they were ready for yet.

But he would not force her. She was not _his_ to command and, smiling to himself, remembered how he’d paid for his arrogance before, when he’d overstepped the line.

He would protect her in every way he could, and refused to let Snoke hurt her like last time. He wanted so much for her, but his former master would rob them both if he could.

Ben also knew she would want to protect her friends, so he would ensure she returned to them, leaving him to do what he had to without dragging her into danger. He _had_ to end this.

He decided it would be better if he stayed away from any conversations with the Resistance. He wasn’t above asking his mother for help in achieving his own ends, but there was no way he was going to get caught up in their schemes. Rey would tell him what he needed to know. A derisive smile pulled at the corner of his mouth - he’d hated the Resistance with such a passion and for so long... and yet, now, he was ready to use them to ensure some kind of safety in the galaxy.

Realising there was no time to waste, he decided he would go back to the Silencer and prep it for flight but as he left he caught Rey’s voice through the corridors.

“Finn, what were you thinking? A signal like that could be traced.”

“I could ask you the same question, Rey. Ben said you worked together to create that projection.”

“Because we didn’t want to alert the First Order that he was still alive!”

“Or certain other members of the Resistance,” Finn snapped.

“That’s not fair. We have to be careful how we do this.”

A moment of silence before Finn spoke again.

“Look, Chewie’s coming, he’ll be here soon. We can all go back and sort this out.”

Ben didn’t want to hear any more. He was not going anywhere near the Resistance, not if he knew what was good for him - he’d only end up as pawn or prisoner once word got out. He knew his mother’s influence only went so far. He stalked back outside as though the forest beasts were nipping at his heels again and, when he cleared the door, he turned to look up the hill where his ship sat. It wouldn’t take long to scale the steep hill to his ship, especially as the air had cooled now. His thoughts plagued him as he pushed on up the hill.

He would not allow himself to be dragged back to the Resistance and neither would he haul Rey with him, to her likely death at Snoke’s hand. If he left, she would have to go back to the Resistance with Finn and Chewie - at least he knew she would be safe there with them and his mother. It would kill him to leave her behind, but he was used to being as good as dead. 

He cursed as he swiped a bunch of fronds aside and pushed up the hill, the physical exertion helping to assuage the fear in his mind. The moment he stopped to take a breath, though, his thoughts started up again.

If he was honest it was _him_ who needed her, not the other way around he realised, as he slashed at a branch with his saber. Story of his life. She would be better off without him. The thought hurt to the point where he felt like his heart might actually stop, but he continued his climb, slicing his way through the vegetation in unnecessarily savage swipes as he made his way to the top of the hill.

He would have to leave for the Ascendancy immediately - Snoke would not leave him time to prepare. He shivered and swallowed hard at the thought, realising he’d probably already taken too much time to warn his mother.

The problem was that the Silencer still bore the damage from Hux’s blast, the bent wing tip was a case in point. He reached up and commanded the force as he straightened it out, sweat beading on his forehead as he wrenched the tip into alignment, wondering if Rey would feel his use of the force and come to find him. He reached for the power of the darkness to harden his shattering heart, knowing what he must do. He must hurry if he was to keep her safe.

The shorted-out electrics in his dash would make little difference, as he could easily use the force to sense and guide his flight and to manipulate his machine. The crack in the transparisteel cockpit would be the main problem as he climbed up into his seat to get a better look at it. His external shields would hold it in place for a while during hyperspace, but atmospheric flight and open space would be the greater test.

He really should replace the transparisteel section – the problem was that if he used the few credit chips rattling about in his back pocket to purchase what he needed, it would be a screaming beacon to the First Order the moment he used them.

Maybe he could use some kind of patch. He scrabbled around in his mech kit, grabbing the solder kit first – it was meant for duralloy not transparisteel so he tossed it back. A roll of bonding tape was the best he could find, it would have to do. Quickly taping up both sides of the crack and stepping back to look at it, he realised it wasn’t great but, with shields, it just might be enough.

Before he could think too much about what he was doing, he jumped into his seat and strapped himself in. As he fired up the ship, he felt a moment of trepidation when it sputtered and glugged, then breathed a sigh of relief when the engine hummed into life.

He glanced quickly over his dash to check what worked and what didn’t. Stabilisers worked, nav computer and hyperdrive were working, but weapons and stealth tech were off-line – hopefully he wouldn’t need them. His rear shields were only at half power, not ideal but enough to hold things together, he hoped. The main problem seemed to be his atmospheric flight and landing controls, they were completely gone. He gritted his teeth – he would use the force if needed.

He hoped Rey would forgive him but he needed to go. Gripping his controls, he pulled up, and the craft lifted, power thrumming normally. He eased into the feel of his ship, letting the force guide him as it began to rise.

Rey burst from the vegetation almost directly in front of him, eyes wild and mouth open in a scream. Ben was jolted by the sheer power that hit him through the force - anger, fright, hurt and two words hurled at him across their bond that ripped at his heart.

_Come back!_

He closed his eyes and tried to go.

_Come back._

His ship continued to rise but then tilted and yawed. He caught it with the force, straightening its trajectory.

Her words sobbed at him across the bond, sounding too much like the lonely desperate child he’d seen in her mind when he’d interrogated her, and his resolve wavered.

_Come Back._

How could he do this? His heart was ripping in two.

Something dark rose up from within the bond. Rey’s anger reached out to him, raw with hurt and terrifying in its power.

_You **will** come back._

Ben watched in dread as the crack in the transparisteel he’d just tried to fix emerged from behind the bonding tape and marched across the expanse of his cockpit view. What had he been thinking, trying to go into space on bonding tape and half-strength shields? If he didn’t land again he’d never make it out of the atmosphere before it disintegrated, let alone survive open space.

Closing his eyes, he let his ship glide back down, returning it to his landing spot at the top of the hill, and to a very angry Rey. With a sinking heart, he wondered if he’d cracked more than his cockpit. As he took his hands off the dual controls, he realised they were shaking.

Rey was standing at the edge of his landing area, fists clenched and eyes blazing at him. He took a breath, feeling like a complete and utter idiot now as he swallowed nervously. Better get this over with.

In a moment of deju vu, he saw her again as she stalked him on Starkiller. He checked his saber at his side - just because her own was out of action didn’t mean anything. She’d be just as happy to use his.

He opened his cockpit and climbed out, but Rey remained where she was, silent. Was that a bad sign? Her stare was almost as painful as the wound she’d dealt him in their first fight.

And there was no point trying to pass this off as a test run on his ship or something, even as he thought of that excuse. She knew he’d been leaving…without her.  And he knew how she was feeling right now because it was how he’d felt when she’d left him on the Supremacy.

He didn’t think he could be any more in love with her as she glared at him. Sweet maker, she was _amazing_ , a whirlwind of power and emotion that threatened to burn him alive. He stopped a few paces from her.

“I’m sorry.”

It was all he could say. 

 

 

Rey felt the darkness that had risen up inside her ebb with her anger as Ben came to a stop in front of her. His apology was raw and devoid of embellishments, honest and penitent. A rush of guilt assailed her, knowing it was her darkness that had forced him to come back. Even as one part of her exulted in how she had stopped him from leaving, the other part of her, the part she wanted to control her, had been shocked and disappointed. The Jedi were right to be wary of the dark side – using it made you selfish.

She couldn’t bear for him to take another step towards her or she would crumble, and she wasn’t ready to forgive him yet. Instead, she turned and ran back down the hill, swatting leaves and branches from her face as much as tears from her eyes and hearing his crashing strides behind her.

“Rey! Wait! Please.” She kept running as more tears blinded her. When she burst out of the vegetation she stopped for a moment, looking out over the blasted landscape and feeling like her heart held a crater much the same size.

Damn him! With a snarl and stab of her outstretched hand into the air, a rock flew into the blast hole, then another and another, reasoning that Chewie would need a place to land. She most certainly did not imagine Ben’s foot under every one of the rocks she hurled into the hole.

She could feel as much as hear Ben approaching behind her. Picking up a particularly large stone, she hurled it into the crater with enough power to crack it. As it shattered, hot tears ran down her face and she brushed them aside with an angry swipe.

“Rey,” he said softly from where he’d stopped behind her. “I can’t go with you to the Resistance.” 

She stopped her violent activity, the crater mostly full. Ben moved to her side, waving a hand, and a sheet of smaller particles washed across the blast site, filling in the holes left by her efforts. She glowered at him but he only looked unhappy.

Rey felt her anger crumble like a sand statue and turned to him, wrapping her arms about him. His arms closed around her as she buried her face in his chest, breathing him in, savouring the solid feel of him, like a rock she could cling to.

“We’ll face Snoke again, together,” he murmured. “But we need to go quickly, before he’s able to regroup his power.”

“We should go on the Falcon. All of us,” she said. Ben shuddered, and she could feel his tumbling emotions, realising his aversion to that ship was probably one of the things that had triggered his attempted flight.

“I believe there’s a Wookie on that ship that doesn’t like me very much.” His attempt at sarcasm fell flat but she understood and nodded - just because things had changed between the two of them didn’t mean things were different with anyone else. Finn had reminded her of that.

“You can’t fly your ship.”

He huffed. “I could, if I could just fix the crack in the main viewport.”

She thought about it for a moment. They would be silly to leave a ship like that behind and cast about in her mind for a solution. It might be possible to mend it with what they had as she looked back up the hill to where his ship sat, just able to make out his quick fix with the bonding tape. She chuckled.

“What’s so funny?” he demanded, an indignant glower in his eyes. Rey looked up at him, unable to suppress the grin on her face.

“You thought you could go into space with only bonding tape between you and death!” She pulled away and punched him in the arm, deciding against telling him it reminded her of the stories Leia had told her about Han.

“Hey, it was all I had!”

“I know, but I’m sure we can find something better than that. When the Falcon gets here, there’ll be something we can use to fix it.”

Ben groaned. “Yeah well, just keep the beast away from me. Wookies don’t forget.” There was a catch in his voice that alerted her to the vulnerable position he was now in.

“Why don’t you stay with your ship for now? I’ll tell Chewie to stay away,” she said, hoping to calm his emotions.

It only served to aggravate him though, as she felt his self-loathing rise up. “I’m not going to hide like a fugitive,” he snapped.

Rey nodded. “I know.” She wanted to yell at him for what he’d been planning on doing. It reminded her that he was on his own trajectory with his own priorities, just like that day on the Supremacy. She couldn’t make the mistake again of presuming he would just skip back to the light and that would be it. Pulling away and heading back towards Reif’s home, she needed something to occupy her mind. If they were going to go anywhere near Snoke she wanted her saber. There had to be a way…

Ben’s emotions surged as he watched her walk inside.

“What do you expect from me Rey? I’m not here to rescue you.”

“You’re the one who needs rescuing, Ben,” she yelled back. At least he was following her inside now.

“Oh really? I can do just fine on my own, thank you,” he snarled. Rey knew it was all bluster and just kept walking.

“You think I’m just going to follow you around like a lost droid?”

She refused to respond to that, but if the shoe fit…

“I came back because you broke my main view window. Now you want me to ask a Wookie who wants me dead to fix it.”

Rey wasn’t sure if Chewie did want Ben dead, but it probably wasn’t a good idea to test the theory.

She heard his stomping footsteps behind her as she swept inside, slowing down only enough to wait for the doors to open.

“See? Told you he wouldn’t leave us behind!” Reif gloated at Finn as she stepped into the main area, with Ben hot on her heels. Finn’s glare shot straight over her shoulder to the tempest storming along behind her. With all the dignity of a Supreme Leader, he strode directly to the old lounge and sat down as though he was sitting on a throne, not a tatty old piece of junk, and folded his arms across his chest. He turned to Finn and spoke with the same natural poise Rey had seen Leia exude when addressing

“My ship needs repairs.”

Rey gazed at him, his profile in sharp relief as he sat in wounded pride. Huffing, she left the room in search of her satchel; on locating it, she pulled out the old lightsaber and found a table in the med room where she could work.

“Oh dear. That looks dire,” Sidebolt commented almost immediately, appearing out of the med room examination counter. Rey stared bleakly at the split stone, nodding in agreement. If she couldn’t fix it, how would she be able to continue her Jedi training, let alone face Snoke again?

Sidebolt pointed to the sundered weapon. “Not easy to split a Kyber crystal,” the old droid spoke in a hushed tone, uncommon for an artificial intelligence. “Not so easy to mend it either.”

Rey looked up as something in her mind seemed to draw together the last few pieces of a puzzle. “What?”

Sidebolt lifted his head. “Must have been a powerful imbalance when it let go.”

Rey frowned, her heart beating as understanding began to blaze in her mind. “Sidebolt, what are you saying?”

“It would need a powerful use of the force – balanced and powerful.”

Rey was gobsmacked. She stared at the droid as it peered down at her broken lightsaber - Sidebolt really was a very old and strange piece of machinery.

“What? How do you know…?”

“I’ve picked up a few things over the years,” Sidebolt said, but Rey was no longer listening. She pulled out the broken crystal from the sheath and laid the pieces together so they touched.

With a rush of movement, Ben had joined her, and was looking down at the fragments of what had been his grandfather’s weapon.

Sidebolt appeared quite satisfied as he looked at the two of them. “You’ll have to work at it, of course. It won’t be healed by itself,” he quipped before disappearing back into the ship.

Rey looked up at Ben, her mouth dropping open as realisation hit them both. All of her struggles to fix the saber on her own had been a fool’s errand, a lesson they had refused to learn!

They’d broken it together, they would have to fix it together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to all my readers and commenters. Thank you especially to @ColliderofHadron for your fabulous beta work on this chapter. Where would I be without you. I hope you enjoyed this chapter.

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is a rewrite of the original fic which I started as "Where I Belong". You can read the original at https://archiveofourown.org/works/14285394/chapters/32952849 . I restarted this fic as the chapters have been restructured and it was too messy to try and fix the original. This has all been in response to finding a great beta reader @colliderofhadron and I would like to say a big thank you to @colliderofhadron for all of your help in making this fic so much better. I hope you all enjoy this new and improved fic. 
> 
> Updates will come through fairly quickly to start with until I catch up to new content again and then will probably slow down again. I will do my best to keep updating as regularly as possible though.


End file.
